How do you feel about lap dance club/pole dancing stuff.........?

[niceglasses]

My dh works in a bit of a boyish industry - mobile phones - tends to be bit 'scummy'.

I'd say ohhhh 5 or 6 times now on a night out they have ended up at these lap dance/topless places. At least he doens't lie about it! He says they just want the extra drink. He doesn't get home till about 4/5 in the morning.

I have gently let it be known I don't like it - he says its harmless.

What do you wise lot think? I don't feel like I can 'ban' him but I do feel a bit put out.

absolutely, if she chose to do it

whatever my daughter chooses to do in life i will support because IMO free will and choice rank are the most improtant gifts we possess as human beings

you go ipanemagirl

What indefensible actions are you talking about?

I would have done it if I had the guts

Do none of you (the ones who are posting about how it's all fine and dandy) think there's something wrong with a society that pays a woman more to take her clothes off than it will pay her to be a nurse? A teacher? A midwife?

Do you really all think it's fine to teach your daughters that it's ok to make a living this way because it's 'harmless'?

now, really must do dinner this time

it's been fun talking to you guys

Expat - are you not arguing??

You can't seriously think that a big wage packet justifies anything (people-trafficking? A thriving hit-man business?)

As long as she's happy doing it and it's now unlawful, then yes, I support my daughters in however they chose to live their lives.

I'm so glad my parents allowed me to do this, including making decisions they knew were going to be huge mistakes, and didn't pass judgement on me.

Their love is unconditional, so is mine for my girls.

Love your body. Love your sexuality. Love how you look.

How you chose to share once you're over 16, no longer living in my house on my dime is your business.

That's just capitalism unfortunately. Demand and supply.

Fortunately capitalism is tempered by socialism in this country, so that we have the NHS.

Dont break a leg in America if you arent insured!

I can't 'live and let live' on this issue because I DO think it affects all of us. It affects all women. So that's all the women posting on this site and all our daughters. And our sons. Our children, who are growing up seeing magazines like Nuts and Loaded displayed in the supermarket. Our sons, who, if they start buying this crap, may believe some of the myths peddled about women and sexuality.

Rowan, how many times have I used 'lawful' and 'legal'?

We're not talking about an illegal activity here.

Lap dancing, like smoking and drinking, are not illegal.

Human trafficking and murder for hire are, so don't go putting words into my mouth.

too right, wickedwaterwitch

Why does someone who strips for a living need to justify him or herself to the masses?

You didn't use the words 'legal' or 'lawful' in your post of 16.50, which was te one I was replying to.

The boundary between what is legal and what is illegal is mutable.

And a lot of people on this thread seem to have fallen for the 'empowerment' ruse, ha ha ha ha!

What's so empowering about taking your clothes off and being paid for it? Don't you think it might be more empowering to be a doctor and be paid the same rate as your male colleague? (given the gender pay gap which still exists)

So condition them not to buy it then. Or pay for it.

But why should other, consenting adults have their freedom to engage in a lawful activity curtailed because they don't fit in with your idea of morality?

That just smacks of . . . fundamentalism.

I havent read the whole thread , as it long. But, I see nothing wrong with anything like this, particularly the better organised ones, where people realy want to work there and get paid well. God, if I still had a figure, thats what I'd be doing now to earn some money! I truely believe I should've done it instead of going to university, and makde loads of moneyt when I was young. I'd have saved the whole lot; I'm like that.
I would have no problem with dh going anywhere like that; why should his interest in women dwindle just because we're together? I trust him that he's look and enjoy, but nothing more. And even if he did, it'd only be sex. It'd still be me that he loved. There's no way I'd waste energy getting all worked up about something like that. I feel secure enough with him, i know him, he knows me, and we both have our boundaries. I know, in return, exactly what he would and wouldn't mind me doing.

Look, I need to go home just now.

Continue nit-picking and arguing yourselves till kingdom come.

For all it's worth.

Agree www.

Wicked waterwitch

Which myths are these?

WWW

I've never worked for a company that pays women less for doing the same job.

Women earn FAR MORE than men in the sex industry. Look at Ronnie Jeremy, he's made a bit but nothing like the female stars! Because they are what the people pay for.

So yes, I do feel they are empowered.

When you say empowering, do you mean because if a girl can get a tenner or more out of just giving a guy a 5 minute lap dance then more foul him?

Lostpuppy (and all of you), do read this fantastic article by Janice Turner here

Here's a para from it

"Once porn and real human sexuality were distinguishable. Not even porn's biggest advocates would suggest a porn flick depicted reality, that women were gagging for sex 24/7 and would drop their clothes and submit to rough, anonymous sex at the slightest invitation. But as porn has seeped into mainstream culture, the line has blurred. To speak to men's magazine editors, it is clear they believe that somehow in recent years, porn has come true. The sexually liberated modern woman turns out to resemble - what do you know! - the pneumatic, take-me-now-big-boy fuck-puppet of male fantasy after all."

Absobloodylutely.

Lostpuppy, how do you know? Did you work in payroll for those companies? because UK wide it's still 12.6% according to govt stats

You were right in your first post, it is very scummy.