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Original poster

AIBU - Sent a personal pic

255 replies

ThirdTimeUnlucky · 30/05/2018 14:25

So, I've been dating a guy for 3 mths. We send personal pics to each other - no big deal. He requested one recently a bit more personal so I decided to send one today as he was stressed at work.
His response was along the lines of who's m*nge is that?
I replied 'just delete it' and then blocked him on WA.
He's now saying (via text msgs) I'm being unreasonable, he apologised for using the wrong terminology, said it took him by surprise (obviously not in a nice way). His last msg was 'I can't win'.
I was going to unblock him but he's just dug a bigger hole for himself.
Am I being unreasonable? He asked for the pic not so long ago. I even edited it with a X (kiss). I feel insulted that he didn't know it was mine! Shock. Lol.

OP posts:
EleanorHooverbelt · 30/05/2018 15:57

www.clinmedjournals.org/articles/jfmdp/journal-of-family-medicine-and-disease-prevention-jfmdp-3-059.php?jid=jfmdp

Victimized children growing up in a dysfunctional family are innocent and have absolutely no control over their toxic life environment; they grew up with multiple emotional scarring caused by repeated trauma and pain from their parents' actions, words, and attitudes. Ultimately, they will have a different growth and nurture of their individual self. The influenced individuals will resume various parenting roles rather than enjoying their childhood, vital parts of their childhood are missing, which will eventually have a harmful effect that extends to their adult life. Victimized adults tend to attempt escaping their past pain, trauma by practicing more destructive behaviors such as increase dues of alcohol, drug abuse or forced to repeat the mistreatment that was done to them.

weemouse · 30/05/2018 15:58

I am born of a simpler time, where sending Fanny and Dick pics to someone you've known for 3 months is just a no-no.

Have you no class or respect for yourself?

I just don't get it.

But good luck to you anyway.

softouch · 30/05/2018 15:58

You object to his language and the fact he didn't recognize your fanny. So you then block him ....... essentially leaving him with photos of your fanny of which he could show to the world.
You need some self respect.

Nikephorus · 30/05/2018 16:00

If it's any consolation OP, while you've no doubt increased his stress levels at work, I feel a whole more cheerful Grin.
(Apart from a craving for a Millie's cookie)

TitZillas · 30/05/2018 16:06

I understand! But I use Snapchat - pictures delete themselves. I suggest you familiarise yourself with the app, it’s a revelation - also, filters!!!
Maybe your minge could be enhanced with the ‘beauty’ filter Grin

amusedbush · 30/05/2018 16:06

Ugh, the word "pussy" gives me the heave.

EleanorHooverbelt · 30/05/2018 16:07

.

Eatmycheese · 30/05/2018 16:11

Ah well, you live and learn

SillyMoomin · 30/05/2018 16:11

LOVE it Eleanor. But we don’t know the op was smiling. It could have been a smouldering gaze. Or seductive. Or cross eyed

cjt110 · 30/05/2018 16:11

Eleanor! ShockGrin

EleanorHooverbelt · 30/05/2018 16:12

I would send that to anyone who asked me for a nude pic. She has a better figure than me too Grin

Ladywillpower · 30/05/2018 16:12

Sorry OP but I've just come in from a really trying day at work & this thread has made me laugh out loud. I am imagining a sort of fanny identity parade or a Bake Off style line up of private parts pics!

alwaysthepessimist · 30/05/2018 16:13

@EleanorHooverbelt - I just spat out my coffee at my desk laughing at that drawing!!!

As for minge photos over whatsapp - seriously op have some self respect for yourself please don't send dirty photos to someone you barely know!

Original poster
ThirdTimeUnlucky · 30/05/2018 16:13

It's really quite amusing how judgey you all are.
I have no probs sending a personal pic to my b/f. My life, my choice etc.
However stupid you think this is, it was a genuine request to my reaction I was after.

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 30/05/2018 16:16

cjt110 op chose to send the pic but it has to be his,fault. We have no idea what the background context to this is, but it must be him bullying her because it's impossible a woman would do this voluntarily.
I know women and especially girls are coerced into this stuff, but we can't assume that OP has and is more susceptible due to her damaged childhood without drone input from ip
Her only issue is he didn't recognise it, calling it Minge instead of Pussy. He should have recognised Pussy and been grateful and exhilarated, presumably going of to the loo to "relieve his stress"

hellsbellsmelons · 30/05/2018 16:18

Well personally - I think you may have over-reacted.
I would have wanted a proper talk face to face about the comment if it had upset me that much.

EleanorHooverbelt · 30/05/2018 16:22

I have no probs sending a personal pic to my b/f. My life, my choice etc

Well, in that case, for what it's worth, I think you did overreact.

The guy couldn't possibly know how you felt about the word "minge". Now that he knows how you feel about it, if he respects your opinion, he will not use it again in your presence.

If you like the guy and think there is mileage in the relationship, blocking him will not give him a chance to resolve this.

Daydreamer2407 · 30/05/2018 16:22

I must be boring as I'd never send a picture of my private parts Confused save it for when you're together

sweeneytoddsrazor · 30/05/2018 16:24

OP i don't know what about his reaction upset you but I think your reaction was OTT. You should probably apologise whilst explaining why you reacted the way you did but accept it if he doesn't agree he did something wrong.

JessicaEccles · 30/05/2018 16:28

Any older readers remember Ask the Family and 'A familiar object from an unfamiliar object'?

Eliza9917 · 30/05/2018 16:33

Unblock him, reply with sorry I was an arse, thought you'd like to see what was for dinner.

or not, and block him forever.

Charm23 · 30/05/2018 16:33

I imagine OP sent the pic in hopes of getting a complimentary reply from this guy about how he liked the pic or how it made him feel, but obviously didn't get that. I can understand why she would now be embarrassed by her actions and would rather block him and never talk about it again.

Notveryladylike · 30/05/2018 16:34

I don't know why you would block him for saying the word minge.
I really don't understand why people send pics like that, literally anyone could get a hold of it!!

pudding21 · 30/05/2018 16:36

Third its entirely up to you whether you want to send intamate photos, so long as you are comfortable with where they might end up. I think his reply was a bit off, but if he asked a week ago, maybe he was sat in a meeting and it kind of shocked him!

Minge is an awful word, I agree, but so is cunt and pussy in my opinion. I don't think there are any nice ways to describe a lady garden ;) (I am joking).

He could have said it in a jokey way, but lost in transaltion with text. i wouldn't have blocked him, you clearly like him. maybe chat about it when you next see him?

................................and if you send anymore photos be prepared to the wide variety of responses you might get ;)

Notveryladylike · 30/05/2018 16:39

You should've replied with, "Mum sends her love".
I have just nearly wet myself!!