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Original poster

AIBU - Sent a personal pic

255 replies

ThirdTimeUnlucky · 30/05/2018 14:25

So, I've been dating a guy for 3 mths. We send personal pics to each other - no big deal. He requested one recently a bit more personal so I decided to send one today as he was stressed at work.
His response was along the lines of who's m*nge is that?
I replied 'just delete it' and then blocked him on WA.
He's now saying (via text msgs) I'm being unreasonable, he apologised for using the wrong terminology, said it took him by surprise (obviously not in a nice way). His last msg was 'I can't win'.
I was going to unblock him but he's just dug a bigger hole for himself.
Am I being unreasonable? He asked for the pic not so long ago. I even edited it with a X (kiss). I feel insulted that he didn't know it was mine! Shock. Lol.

OP posts:
dinosaurkisses · 30/05/2018 15:29

There's nothing shocking about a picture of your vagina- it is just a bit Hmm to send an image like that when you are sensitive enough to be mortally offended by the reciever being a bit ??? about said picture being sent on a Wednesday afternoon at work.

cjt110 · 30/05/2018 15:29

But what's the point of asking for opinions when everyone is having a laugh at my expense at the idea of sending personal pics.

YWBU to send a personal picture.
YABU to be offended by the word minge and the fact that he didnt recognise yours.... happy?

PlatypusPie · 30/05/2018 15:30

I have love letters tucked away from various beau ( well love letters is overstating it a bit, but if not all were passionate they were funny and charming ) I look forward to looking over them when I am a very old lady and being reminded of the actual interaction of our more personal bits.

Built in obsolescence of much of modern tech might be the saving grace of those who clicked, sent and regretted.

UserV · 30/05/2018 15:30

Seriously, have some self respect. Grow a thicker skin if you get offended by a word someone uses for something.

Agree.

I cannot believe that someone who is so vulgar and blasé that they would send a photo of their chuff to a virtual stranger, would be so mortally wounded by what he said.

Has the OP been here since her original post by the way?

EleanorHooverbelt · 30/05/2018 15:30

Also, I don't give a flying feck who he shows it to as long as it's not family, lol

But this is exactly the problem. You can't control this now. He could potentially show his brother/cousin etc. I sincerely hope he doesn't of course.

deadringer · 30/05/2018 15:30

I assume the op was upset that he didn't know who sent it, not because he didn't recognize her bits, but because surely if she is in a relationship with him no other woman would be sending him intimate photos, so he should have known it was her. Anyway whatever op, it's really not a good idea, you hardly know this guy.

FairNotFair · 30/05/2018 15:31

I'm just enjoying the crack Smile

cjt110 · 30/05/2018 15:32

EleanorHooverbelt I must agree wholeheartedly with the post you have made. OP I think the reason people are reacting the way they are is that you have not shown yourself much self respect here. Please value yourself and your body more.

MaryandMichael · 30/05/2018 15:32

God help us, I thought she had mange.

VioletCharlotte · 30/05/2018 15:32

... and this is why I don't date!

How did we get to a place where it's considered perfectly normal to send pictures of your fanny to someone when they're at work?!

PattiStanger · 30/05/2018 15:33

This is making me feel like I'm from a bygone era, when did pictures of genitals become an acceptable method of reducing work stress?

And how odd to wait a week before sending it.

Block him if you're annoyed with him, you don't need the internet's approval.

BlueBalletDress · 30/05/2018 15:34

You can't block him and split up after sending a fanny pic Shock He could send it anywhere!

If I were you I'd hang in there until your minge is a distant memory...then dump him.

UserV · 30/05/2018 15:34

Sorry @eleanorhooverbelt I am not going to 'flame' you but are you winding us up?

The OP CHOSE to send her fanny pic. This man didn't treat her like a piece of meat; she CHOSE to send the pic.

RubySapphireEmerald · 30/05/2018 15:35

Clearly I have led a sheltered life. Shock

EleanorHooverbelt · 30/05/2018 15:35

@cjt110

Whew! Thanks Smile

I am sure some posters will not agree with me (not everyone will) but it's nice that you understood what I was trying to say and don't think I'm too maiden aunt about this.

daffodillament · 30/05/2018 15:36

Also, I don't give a flying feck who he shows it to as long as it's not family, lol Really ?????

dogsdinnerlady · 30/05/2018 15:36

I would LTB on the grounds that he doesn't know his 'who's' from his 'whose'.

UserV · 30/05/2018 15:36

I agree with some of your post Eleanor, but it does not apply to the OP in my opinion!

cjt110 · 30/05/2018 15:37

UserV In Eleanor's defence, yes the OP sent the photo but it was in return for photos/requests to do so. Never heard of peer pressure? Or done something because you thought you had to?

SleepingStandingUp · 30/05/2018 15:38

Eh up lass, smashin vag, I'm just off to loo to crack one off!

Is that what you were hoping for?

TitZillas · 30/05/2018 15:39

OP have you never heard of Snapchat?! Wink

starsandstuff · 30/05/2018 15:39

Aw OP. The way people are reacting you'd think you'd sent pics of their minge, ffs.

It's totally your own business what you do with your body including photographing it and sharing it with someone if that's what you want to do.

I totally get why you're upset that you sent what you thought was a sexy photo and got back a slap in the face instead of a positive reaction. I think blocking him immediately was pure embarrassment, but I don't think it was necessarily the wrong thing. He sounds like a bit of a jerk - that was insensitive and then following it up with a whiny "I can't win"...yeah, fuck that.

Off you go an find someone who thinks your pussy is fabulous and is thrilled to bits to be allowed access to it in any way shape or form of YOUR choosing.

(PS I prefer "pussy" as well - minge is the preserve of the 13 year old boy. I'm quite partial to a foof as well.)

WhatATimeToBeAlive · 30/05/2018 15:39

He was probably completely shocked to receive a pic of your bits while he was at work. If he asked you a week ago then it's likely he was in the mood at the time, but for something like that to "pop up" when he's working on his tax return Excel Spreadsheet, or whatever, would have been a bit of surprise as he was maybe expecting to see "hi how's your day", so thought it was a joke. If you're having sex I'm a bit surprised he didn't recognise it - guess he's had more of a close-up now than previously.

EleanorHooverbelt · 30/05/2018 15:40

@UserV

I see what you mean about my post.

I agree the OP wanted to do this, but I also think that a lot of young people are subconsciously pressured nowadays into this sort of behaviour to be cool and edgy and so guys don't get bored of them. Like in older times, girls would feel pressure to "put out" against their better judgement iyswim.

If the OP is indeed cool and sanguine about this, that's great. But then I feel she would then have let this guy's comment just roll off her back and also she'd be totally unconcerned about where the pic ended up.

I think the OP needs to be alone with herself and untangle her REAL feelings about this and why she feels that way.

No judgement from me either way, it's just that if she is doing something that upsets her so badly, then she needs to own it or change it.

SleepingStandingUp · 30/05/2018 15:40

A week ago cjt110 and op has said nothing to suggest it was more than a one off requests.

And peer pressure from who? You think all the women at work talk about how much their men like their photos of their vulvas??

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