Feeling positive about the future after DH died

[Chasingsquirrels]

Just starting off before we hit 1000 on the last thread...

Happy birthday mini-cake.

Made me smile not taking the book so you didn't cry willow. I love a good sobbing book, but not in public.

Just sent the boys out with Charlie now it's cooled down a bit. They skipped jogging club earlier.

He does like me a lot (well his words and actions are telling me so).
I like him a lot too. It is really too early days to be putting labels or whatever to it.
But I think I'm getting in deep here, and I'm terrified of getting hurt.
I don't want to break again, and certainly not yet.

Morning all, must dash, but just come to say thanks for the wishes. Much better eve/night so hopefully today will be a bit more energetic (if only I could say the same for me)

Chilly start here - hard to believe it's going to be boiling later...

Take care all x

Morning all.
Quite overcast here an hour ago when the boys went to school and beautiful now.
On which note I need to get going, busy day with work, taxi-ing kids and bridge club.

Morning all.
Misty and overcast here too, hopefully brighten up like yesterday.

Had a 'dam bursting' from ds1 last night. Set of by being scammed by one of the friends online he hasnt spoken to for a while, he chatted, sent him a link to something which was supposed to be funny and it was a scam link where he stole half of his inverntory items from his game and blocked him! WTAF? Why would you do that to a friend?
ANyways upshot was he was distraught/angry and I got the brunt of it as he still hadnt done the dishes and I (unaware of the above) yelled at him to move it. So after the yelling match it all poured out. He is miserable, at home and at school. He is being bullied at school, just small stuff but accumulative when its every day, one of his classes is with younger kids (they have support teachers in school due to behaviour problems) but they talk and distrupt the class so its affecting his concentration. I am all for inclusion but if its affecting others learning there needs to be a solution somehow. He was crying and telling me all sorts of stuff he feels. Bit shellshocked. We need to make some changes at home to I think. I cant have him feeling like crap all the time. Anyways he stayed home today and I have fired of an email to his pastoral teachers to request a meeting at their earliest convenience once school starts.

Any ideas to build up his confidence welcome.

Best get on and do something constructive I suppose, might even rope ds1 into helping

Have a good day all.

Morning!
Overcast and a bit cooler here too :)
Chasing - have a reassuring (hug) from me - it is so new for you, and not surprisingly scary, but there is no rush.
MrsJ - good to hear its better for you, and you got through DS' birthday - good luck on the party
Willow - I always forget that you break up earlier - another 4 weeks down here
So I have managed to get a bit done this morning already.
Washing out on the line , kitchen cleaned top to bottom
I did mending yesterday ( DGS and knees in school trousers cut down to shorts - found out what is causing that - he is spinning on his left knee on the artificial grass in the playground ) along with hems on DH new trousers and some other bits and bobs. So my needs doing pile has gone, so I can do some 'new' sewing today .
Have a lovely day everyone

x post Willow - ooh, thats hard for you and DS - but a very trite thing is true - better out than in , and at least you know what he is going through/feeling. I have no real knowledge of boys - we just tried to make our girls know they were loved, and tried to build up self confidence in themselves . I think it is harder in this age of social media though ((((hugs)))

Have had an email back from pastoral teacher with the name of his new pastoral teacher when he goes back. (another new one!) She will pass on the info and new one will arrange a meet up.

Been driving him nuts this morning trying on all his clothes as I knew some had to be too small but he is embarassed to admit it. Got a pile for the rag bag! Argghgh got him 2 new pairs of joggers in same size and one fits fine with room to move the other are tight! Seriously, get a grip folks, same make, same size but they are not! Taking him on friday to get new clothes (his worst nightmare ) I wish he would wear bloody jeans, or trousers it would be so much easier and more choice but he lives in joggers, hates jeans.

Book I have a few things to sew too, been sitting there for far too long to mention! Its on my todo list today! I dont know what happened to ds1 he was always a happy confident little toddler/preschooler. Speech and language far ahead for his age, memorised books and poems as a toddler, always trying new stuff etc but somehow that confidence vanished and I have spent years telling him he is good at stuff he just has to learn it and practice it, he is just as good as anyone else, he knows how much we both love them, now he is the same on the outside but something has got lost inside. Its horrible to think he felt like this and I could be part of the problem. Thanks for the hugs. Yes social media is a pia.

Squirrels you just have to trust him. There are no guarentees, wish I could give you some, but he sounds very nice and I think you would have spotted if he was a wrong un by now, you are far to astute to be fooled by fancy words/actions. The fact that you both can spend time out and about or sit and chat and its comfortable just the two of you and leads to smooches is a good sign is it not? I think you need to trust yourself too. ((hugs))

Not a good afternoon here. We live on a very quiet 20 mile an hour road. We've just had an ambulance and two police 🚨 cars go screaming past and the air ambulance landed in the field just down the road too. 40 minutes and no sign of air ambulance leaving!!! Very worrying as we know everyone who lives down there!

Air ambulance left 5 minutes ago... 😪

oh no 84 - not nice to think about, its upsetting when you know the people, and who it might be .
Had a good day here , we got our pressure washer out and cleaned outside all over the place , I even did the bins ! - nice to get them clean with a good bit of sunshine to help it along . Got the ironing out of the way after lunch. Then the sewing machine out and faffed around and got some bits made. Went off to the allotment after coffee to water and pick courgettes , broad beans and raspberries . DH is making risotto with the courgettes and broad beans with some bits of chicken left from Sunday, so I haven't even had to cook !
Very relaxed here....

Rumours are circulating around the village.....

Hope you get reliable news soon 84

Sounds like a productive day book

Oh willow that sounds upsetting for both of you. Are they on holiday now for the summer or nor till Friday?

squirrel you must be terrified of getting hurt. Willing that it doesn't happen. Hope Charlie has been behaving after his spate of antics recently.

Busy day tomorrow and sports day Friday argh! This time of year is so busy! Both DC also have a school trip next week - like they've run out of things to do so let's take them on a trip....

MrsJ yes we are freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Ooh sports day, its always a long afternoon isnt it ?

84 hope its not as serious as it sounds.

Book another busy day, you never stop (even when you are sitting down!)

Need to bring the washing in and sort it out. Hosp for scan tomorrow, ds2 coming with me for company, might drag ds1 along and go out for lunch after it.

Good luck at the hospital.

Sports day is in the morning luckily as it's meant to be very hot!

Catch up with you all later x

Quick dip in just to see how the scan went Willow - hope you are enjoying your lunch out with the boys :)
Will be out and away shortly to pick up DGS and do a bit of shopping, not much - its too hot!
Have a good day all

Afyernoo all.
Just back home. Scan done won't find out results till next week.
Stopped off at a cafe for lunch and too stuffed so got puds to bring home😀 had to open car doors and hang about for a while as it was too hot to sit in when we came out! 30° air vents didnt even come close to below luke warn until we were nearly home.
Got to take ds2 to his palls next they are hanging out till time for cadets.

Slightly cooler this side only 27°😉

Hope you are all enjoying the weather but not too hot

Have heard a version of what happened yesterday.
Can't say anymore really.
Was going to go 🛒 with Mum but too hot. Cooler now so have taken Mr B for a walk and made elderflower cordial for usand chocolate brownies for the local country fair!

(((hugs))) 84

I've been a bit absent again, been reading but not keeping up with posting.

Willow I am so sorry to read your post about ds1, it's so hard to see them struggling with things. I don't know what to suggest. The tech clearly isn't helping, but taking it away? Would that just make him feel more isolated?
Whats with same make "identical" clothes, I find this too.
And fingers crossed for scan results x

book busy as always. DGS spinning on the grass made me laugh, and ARTIFICIAL grass?? I love it when I've pressure washer, haven't done it this year.

84 Hope you are okay, its hard when things happen to people you know.

MrsJ have fun at sports day, ours was always in the morning as well

I've really struggled this week, I think it's been my emotions catching up with me. I'm not sure if I said that Sat evening with C turned into Sat night and Sun morning. It's very early days and it's going way too fast, but I have fallen for him. And I wasn't expecting that - I was just planning on dating, seeing how things went, getting out a bit.

Thank God it's Friday! I am soooo tired - late nights & early mornings; looking forward to a lie in this weekend.

Chasing, sorry to hear you are struggling. I think it's inevitable, given what has happened over the past few years. No advice, except to do what YOU want, whatever that may be.
If you & C want to see more of each other, go for it. If not, then slow it down. Do you think he feels the same way? (No need to answer if you'd rather not).

This sounds like a cliché but sadly true - we only get one chance at life and we have to grab happiness when we can. I'm sure things will work out for you.

84, for you also, sounds like a sad week.
I know several medics who are based on our air ambulance. It's an amazing service and whilst the outcomes aren't always the best, it is good to know it's there when needed.

Your DGS spinning and putting holes in the knee of his trousers made me smile book. Brought back memories of when DS2 did the same - IN A BRAND NEW SUIT purchased for a relative's wedding!!! I was when I saw the state of his knees! Luckily it was after the official photos! 😁

Willow, your poor DS. Maybe limit the tech a bit and keep talking to him; it's important theses teens know we are on their side and I'm sure your lovely boy does. You do so much for your lads; they know you have their back. ❤️

Good Luck for Sports Day, I know some DC don't like them. Do they do Parents Races MrsJ? The sight of a dozen or so 30+yr old (mainly out of condition) men thundering down the 10Om sprint has never left me!!; 😂

Have a good day everyone, off to work soon for me. Boss off today - feels like a holiday! 😉

Morning all
lovely here, but just a tad cooler, so much more comfortable for me.
Willow - fingers crossed for next week, and the scan. Hope that now your boys have finished for the summer, there will be less problems for you - certainly hope so!
Horse - I am so, so glad I don't have to work in this heat, it must be tiring but enjoy the little bit of freedom today, boss free and the weekend lie -ins :)
MrsJ - hope you are okay , and the sports day goes well this morning.
84 - I bet Mr B preferred the walk in the cool - really fancy some elderflower cordial now
Chasing - its all a bit of an emotional rollercoaster isn't it . I bet you don't know if you are stood on your head or your heels. Just let yourself relax about it, take your time and see where it leads you.
Off to do some committee work this morning and a stint at the allotment - picking fruit and such and it didn't get watered yesterday , so need to make sure everything gets done thoroughly today. My arms will be 2" longer by the end of the day....
Faffing inside this afternoon , out of the sun
Have a great day everyone

forgot to say - the artificial grass . As DGS is in his first year, they have their own little fenced in playground outside the classroom , half of it is the artificial grass, so not a vast area, but enough!

Morning all.
Overcast today not so nice.

We are shopping today then going swimming if piss this afternoon. Ds1 not keen as he is embarrassed about being overweight so will see what happens.
Watched tv last night binge watching the dog rescuers of all things. Makes you furious then happy at the way the dogs are helped and find new homes 😀

Ds2 had bit of meltdown over friends constantly calling/ttexting him about playing with them on xbox when he couldn't actually get onto the game they were playing but they didnt start a new one for him to join. What the heck? When we were out yesterday his phone went constantly from when we sat down for lunch till we got home asking him when he was coming over! How did they think he was going to get there any quicker when he told them where we were? This generation seem to have no concept of time!

Have told them both we are having tech free days and will be spendumg days going out durung hols. Ds1 not happy he serms to think he has a right to do whatever he wants in hols and we had a ridiculous argument over chores.
I think he lives in a fantasy world where he doesnt have to do anything until it suits him! As long as he does it quickly and half heartedly eventually its ok. I am worried about his futire tbh.

But will see how the tech free days go. If i dont appear for a day thats the reason😀

Squirrels no real advice just grab happiness when.you can you deserve it.

Don't work too hard Horse
Goid luck with sports day MrsJ

Currently laying in the cool of the evening on my new sun lounger. I bought them from my catalogue on a buy one get one half price so two for £30. Had a mishap the first day when the back flew up and hit the bridge of my glasses resulting in blood trickling down my nose...!!

Oof!84 thats the kind of thing that happens to me😀 hope its not too sore.

Never got swimming there was something on at pool but we are goung to see jurassic world 2 tomorrow😀
Got ds1 more joggers and a baseball cap and socks and didnt kill him! His attitude to the clothes trying on bit sucked. Got sime foid bits and went to bank and cafe then home. Yet another yelling match later over wifi. Some of his arguments are bizarre and he cant seem to see that. All calm now.

I dread having a house with neighbours although if they have a bedroom each it will be 100 times easier.
Have bid on another house in the area but not in school town. Hey ho better than nothing.