I agree, she's not the love of his life. She's very far from that but he's got to convince everyone, and even more importantly himself that she is. He knows he's going to look like a complete idiot otherwise. So that's what the SM posts and tattoo are about. He's also going to have to try to mould himself around her expectations too, and perhaps that's even a novelty for him for the moment, but he's got to keep her onside for now.
It's interesting about his daughters. Did he remove himself, or allow them to remove themselves, from his life as ruthlessly as he's moved away from you? If so, that shows a particular type of character that can really take compartmentalising to a high level.
His ego must be crushed that you've not begged him to come back. Really crushed. So I think there is a degree of deliberate rubbing your nose in it, for punishment and to try to provoke a reaction. His deluded self doesn't realise though, that all he is doing is making himself look like a foolish, mid-life crisis man.
I also think it's really strange that he's not been in touch to sort out finances, the house etc. Why? If he was genuinely blissfully happy with OW then I'm fairly sure he would be wanting to get his finances sorted and chuck his lot in with her. He's not done that though. Is he pretending this whole sorry mess isn't happening? Is he holding out hope that he can come home? Is he shit scared to move this forward now? The no contact can't continue indefinately. This stuff has to be sorted, so why isn't he taking steps to sort it?
I wonder if, thinking back, you can now see some unpleasant character traits that were always evident, but not so obvious at the time as they weren't aimed at you. The lack of contact with his own daughters? Perhaps his need to be seen to be doing well, look good?
Anyway, I hope you have a good week and continue to grow stronger daily. FWIW I think it's done you good to now know a little of what he's doing.