Bring on the Spring Flings. It's Dating Thread 132!

[VetOnCall]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Hello Choc thanks for that, I might have a look

Welcome mywonderfulstar - Im in my 40s and use PoF, just be careful, dont over invest, you will get lots of messages but you have to kiss a lot of toads until you find your prince. (metaphorically speaking of course) It is a steep learning curve (Ive only been on about 5 weeks)

We will all help and support you here.

Looking forward to tomorrow evening with MrFrench

Thanks Jax I’ve just had a look at it. Do people go into much detail on their profile?

runs could you try and speak to both on the phone to see how you get on? choc is spot on though. Having things in common is so important.

Jax good luck for tomorrow!!

mywonder I'm in my late 40s. I've tried various sites but POF is the best for having so much traffic. However the majority are odd, so you do have to do a lot of sifting. Make sure you read up on lovebombing and ghosting as they'll probably happy to you at some point. And keep reading this thread. It's got me through so many different dilemmas.

I am meeting Mr Academic tomorrow for a drink. And I'm really looking forward to it. He's quite shy, but we have loads in common. We actually met on Tinder over a love of apostrophe mis-use. And it was actually only when we met last week that we realised how much we had in common.

Mywondefulstar I'm 50 and I use POF and Tinder.
I'm happy to pm you the link to my profile if you want to have a look. Or you can sign up as a man and have a quick look at the competition before deleting your profile.

Thanks Runsforcake that’s would be really helpful

choc, TomHardy Mr Hat and Mr Vest are the same age and very similar. And I suspect both are really just after FWB which I'm not so keen on trying. I'm going to try and learn a bit more about them over the next few days then make a decision.
Talking on the phone is a good call.

runs phone calls with both sounds a fine idea. If you can't decide, can you put one of them off until you can fit a coffee in or something?

Can I win the age competition please? Just been contacted by............... An 85 year old. EIGHT FIVE. I'm 46. FML.

sky I love that!! If it was me I'd reply just to be nice.

toms not a chance - he wants someone between 35 and 48, has a weight restriction and is looking for fwb 😯😂

tom and lost can I join the leaving the headfuckery alone but missing someone so bad corner?

sky that's hilarious. And he wants FWB. Well why not! There's no age restriction on that.

I've been asked by someone else if I'm free Saturday evening. Maybe I should just meet them all at different times in different bars

Runs you can run between them. On a serious note definitely put the last one back asap.

You could manage two coffees on Sat, 5-7. 30pm (say you have to get back for something), then 8pm onwards?
I have driven between coffee dates twice, it's just coffee.

Runs maybe I'm bad but at the rate men on OLD disappear I'd Kerri chatting to both and I'm willing to bet the problem will resolve itself.
One/both will disappear
One/both will take the sex chat too far
One/both will cancel on you.

As you can tell I'm feeling a bit cynical tonight 😂

Choc that's a good plan! I've already got a coffee date booked with another on Saturday morning.

Springtime my thoughts exactly. One is already a bit non-committal. The last one to ask will have to wait in line.

And to shake things up even more, one of the very first guys I met on POF has been in touch. We never actually dated because of distance & other stuff. Instead we met twice as friends and randomly keep in touch. Haven't heard from him for about 6mths & then he suddenly sends a text asking if I'm free for a coffee when I'm juggling dates with 4 men!

sky oh my word! That is brilliant!

tech yes!! Welcome. I just think about the bad bits (and ignore the cool stuff we did together) and that really keeps me going. I did text him once since we split when I was drunk. It was after a not great date and I told him I missed him and the stuff we did. He just replied "thanks and sorry things didn't work out". Twunt. Things didn't work out as he was a headfuck.

spring I think that's probably an accurate guess as to what could happen. Hopefully though one of them will turn out to be a good one runs.

Spring I'm coming to jump in the cynical corner with you! I've had two arrange dates this week and two days before in a poof of smoke they have gone! The last one I really liked by text but onwards and upwards NEXT....
but can someone please reassure me they are men that actually want to leave the house and go on a date 😩

Well I'm in the crying into my pillow
Corner as Mr Police has said that being in match and dating has made him realise he's not ready for a relationship. So sat date is cancelled.

Ahhhhh why don't people work this stuff out beforehand!

It's a horrible feeling and a lot I think are there for an ego boost. It's all about the chase and some have no or little intention of meeting. It's one of the reasons I'm on a break from OLD. I think if I'm feeling like going back I'll keep reading here.

Newphase I would be upset too, but if you saw each other for several weeks and then he said no it would be worse. At least he was honest. Have a good vent and... Next!

Love this thread! Continue to read religiously.

Sorry to hear of all the flakes out there, I’m on the edge all the time for fear of flakes! Haha it’s not really the way to live.

Seen a guy for three dates - I’m getting closer to smitten bench, waaaay too early right? Erks. (Think I know the answer), there has to be a way to not invest. Any advice?

Reading WMLB but finding it a bit old fashioned! Need a ‘how to deal with whatsapp’ chapter in there...

Thenew sorry things didn’t work out

Mr Tinder came over yesterday, he took ages to get here, spoke to him at 10.30am when he said he was going to have a shower and then leave, 3 hours later he got here (so I was a bit annoyed) this meant that he ended up being here when my dd’s got home so he met them briefly which was not really my plan. He then went home and I haven’t heard from him since, probably scared off by my kids.

thenew That's really hard. Sorry to hear he's ended things. But it's better it ends now rather than further down the line when you are really invested. As time goes on you might look back and realise there were some signs that you'd missed. You can either get back on the horse, so to speak, or take a break until you're ready. In the past I've just gone back into it, and whilst nothing has even been long lasting, it does help with your self esteem, knowing people do want to meet you.
choc is right though, most of them are in it for the chase.

popple WMLB is really helpful, isn't it? What WhatsApp advice do you need? There's bound to be someone on here who can help.

love don't despair. Is he usually good at messaging? Hopefully he will be in touch at some point today. Despite him being late, did you have a nice time together?

Tom he was working a night shift last night, I just expected a message when he got home, I know he was tired and wanted to get a hours sleep before work, he’s not the most thoughtful person so it’s not really out of character. Over all things were good when he was here. I think I just need to wait and see, I’m just gearing myself up for him disapearing at some point, I don’t usually get past date 3 or 4 so this is unusual for me, I don’t feel comfortable enough to not think he won’t just vanish.