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Original poster

Bring on the Spring Flings. It's Dating Thread 132!

999 replies

VetOnCall · 02/04/2018 22:56

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
CoverMeLads · 19/04/2018 13:49

Val my kitten is white; might have to get him a flat cap and a tiny accordion.....

Lovemusic33 · 19/04/2018 14:03

Pudding I understand working nights is hard, I wouldn’t have minded if he has just said ‘I’m too tired to come over’ but he didn’t exactly say that. I’m not going to ask him when I’m going to see him, will leave it with him, not going to chase him around. I’m an outdoorsy person, if the suns out and I’m not at work I want to be out, I’m not sure if it’s going to work with someone who works nights and spends most of the day in bed. I’m not actually sure how he thinks a relationship will work whilst working nights. I’m going to go out and enjoy the sun in my garden.

Chocolate123 · 19/04/2018 16:40

Love I learned the hard way not to wait around for a guy. I ask when and where are we meeting etc and if he starts messing around I don't give too many chances. If they are eager to see you they will make time and effort. Yes working nights is difficult but he shouldn't have suggested it then. A relationship needs work from both sides not just yours.

ValMc1 · 19/04/2018 16:42

It's days like today that I miss not having a partner - I would love to be sitting in my garden having a glass of wine while he cooks something on the barbie (not that I've got one - exH got that in the divorce)

Lovemusic33 · 19/04/2018 16:58

He’s just messaged me, hasn’t even mentioned today plans.

Val I feel the same, I love the summer, sitting out in my garden, would be nice to have someone to enjoy it with. I shall sit in my hot tub alone and watch the birds.

ValMc1 · 19/04/2018 17:16

Love I'm just cutting my grass and I'll join you !

CoverMeLads · 19/04/2018 17:24

I’d like to be in a gastropub beer garden. Or a field. Or the gardens at Versailles (but only if I owned the place and had it to myself).

ValMc1 · 19/04/2018 18:01

Love I have Robin join me - my new mate - he is scrummy - my darling old cat died just before Christmas so now he can join me without fear !

fraggle500 · 19/04/2018 19:51

Hi
After reading all your posts with interest - I want to join the club!
Been OLD on and off for 5 years. A few dates, lots of disappointment and just need a general " it's not just me" POV about this OLD lark.
I've hoping to learn how to navigate the path and look at for red flags 😊

Lovemusic33 · 19/04/2018 19:51

I have arranged to go out tomorrow with a friend so if MrTinder suddenly decides he wants to see me I can say I’m busy.

The longer evenings are harder, at least in the winter I could hide under a blanket and go to bed early. Summer is harder, would love someone to sit outside with, to have a bbq with, I don’t think Mr Tinder will ever be that as he would always be working.

broccolicheesebake · 19/04/2018 22:21

Been chatting with a couple of guys on bumble. One dropped in to conversation when discussing relationships that they miss the physical side rather than the relationship. Would you take that as a polite way of saying they are just up for a shag? Or am I reading too much in to it?

Other guy we've been chatting about personality disorders, Trump and attachment theory Grin... Cool!

pudding21 · 19/04/2018 23:24

Yes, they're saying exactly that. Go in with open eyes.

All arranged with mr french, going to stay with him Monday night as he lives near the airport (I'm an hour away). He's really upped the flirting and opened up a little more. I'm already excited!

pudding21 · 19/04/2018 23:25

I say upped The flirting it's still Nice and not too full on despite the fireworks when we met ;)

Chocmallows · 20/04/2018 00:52

Back from my date with Mr Cute. I thought it was heading for friendship, but straight after the date he messaged about date 3. Think he's a slow mover in terms of physical actions, but that suits me. Date 3 this weekend, so I'll see if I can get a snog then.

Lovemusic33 · 20/04/2018 08:55

Mr Tinder messaged to see of I was free today, asking me to come to his house. Told him I'm busy and then arranged to see him Sunday. I need to ask him what he is actually looking for because I'm not going to do all the running around just for sex, I can't afford to keep driving over to his, if it's just a fwb thing I would rather find someone who lives closer or who is willing to travel to me.

user1490465531 · 20/04/2018 09:01

Lovemusic this seems to much like a FWB arrangement why can't he meet half way and go out and do something on your date like walks dinner etc.
If it's always at his house for a shag I would bin him.

ValMc1 · 20/04/2018 09:07

Love I agree with User - suggest lunch somewhere between the two of you and gauge his reaction - it could tell you a lot.

Chocolate123 · 20/04/2018 09:31

Love I had a situation before he kept wanting to go to his house. One day I one afternoon I said yes I'll come over and we can go out for lunch and a walk. When I got there he said let's skip lunch and go upstairs. I was firm and said no I'm hungry let's go out. We did and he actually sulked for the whole lunch. I went back got my car made an excuse and left. Got home and sent him a message saying I wasn't interested in a FWB I wanted a relationship and he said well an important part of it is sex!!! I deleted him and never saw him again. You should call his bluff over the weekend and as others have said suggest something outdoors no where near either house so he'll know that it won't end up in bed.

IronNeonClasp · 20/04/2018 09:38

Caught up.
The more I read (and experience) I really think I'm going to take a break...

Jaxinthebox · 20/04/2018 11:31

oh I have my very own MrFrench
god he is HOT! we have been chatting for a few days, didnt think it would go anywhere really but it has moved along at a nice pace, he phoned me last night for a quick chat. He has a strange accent, mixture of Scottish and French. We are meeting on Wednesday as he is off next week.

Also have mrmotorbike nice, normal, chatty - but his kids are still pretty young (not teens like mine) this is my Sunday coffee date (hangover dependent)

And lastly a man who is into Dom/Sub scene - just talking to him. He is very interesting and articulate. I know nothing about it - apart from the 50 shades and other usual things. It has piqued my curiosity levels though.

pudding21 · 20/04/2018 15:33

love it sounds like Mr Tinder wants all the benefits but without making effort, if that is not what you want, I'd say its best you tell him and see if he steps up. If he doesn't find another Mr Tinder ;)

Jax Seems to be a lot of Frenchies about ;) Have fun! My Mr French also lived in Scotland so has a strange but sexy twang to his accent. I think a lot of guys try talking to sub/ dom talk, but I bet only a few really practice it with any level of real experience. I don't know that much about it all really, but I imagine done right, can be an interesting relationship. I think a lot of guys thinks it just means they can choke/spank/ tie up a woman and that makes them a Dom.

I am really excited about Monday, it will be a nice way to leave Portugal and start the business trip. Just hope I don't get another urine infection ;)

Jaxinthebox · 20/04/2018 16:01

are you any better pudding . I had a UTI last year and it took 3 courses of antibiotics to clear it! Bloody agony.

MrFrench does indeed have a sexy French/scottish accent.

I have actually read quite a lot about the whole D/S and its interesting. Think one would have to be pretty careful though, otherwise it could all end in disaster.

pudding21 · 20/04/2018 16:11

I am thanks Jax, almost totally back to normal, still got a couple more days of antibiotics. I think its cleared now.

Lovemusic33 · 20/04/2018 16:13

I’m going to suggest meeting half way with Mr Tinder. Last weekend we were meant to go out but due to the weather we didn’t go and spent most of the day at his house. He was the one that suggested going out, he also mentioned ‘not basing a relationship on sex’. I’m having awful problems with my periods so I don’t think sex will be on the cards this weekend anyway, we shall see what his reaction is. A bit pissed off as last weekend we discussed coming off of OLD and making it a permenant thing, we also talked about what we want out of a relationship so I assumed this would be more than FWB. Feeling a bit fed up.

Jaxinthebox · 20/04/2018 17:06

I messaged you pudding

love . see what happens this weekend and by his reaction you will know the score.