The Fabulous Crown wearing cafe. No contact thread part 9...

[seshi]

Hello ladies for anyone attempting, going through or wanted to try No Contact. We don't judge on here... Just lots of lovely support and advice... Come join us

Don't go @Bloodyuselessatthinkingofaname we all need each other to keep going!!!

My new motto

Love it belonger

Thanks for the answer Belonger. Nobody has the right to make you feel like that and he is definitely not worth being in contact with if that's how you feel.

Basseting unfortunately nothing you say about DOM surprises me anymore. You seem like such a lovely woman. I hope and pray you will let him go and enjoy your twilight years with someone you deserve

Welcome onthe you'll get amazing support on here.

Ginger I don't think either of you will back down anytime soon. It's very tit for that. Myself and my H are like that. It's toxic and draining

@NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5 how do I deal with it then? I just can't bear this awful cycle. I'm trying to not engage with the crazy but it's such a headfuck. l don't even care if won't back down I just want him to accept that it's making me unhappy.

Grrrr whilst I’m doing ok today I weakened and looked at NC on google images (he does lots of public speaking in his field) Oh well, sort of can’t believe that unless anything changes I will never see or speak to him again (our worlds don’t collide in any way)
But never mind - not tempted to break NC

I think you're doing really well ginger, I would keep going with not engaging with his attempts to play Mr Generously Trying To Talk About What's Wrong With You. Keep working on sorting the practicalities of separating your business interests. Have less and less contact with him, minimise every response. He might well increase his efforts to pull you back in but come and tell us and we'll keep you straight!

ravens I'm in awe of your ability to not contact! Fabulous.

@Belonger if I look back over the past 6 months I can see I've been stepping g back bit by tiny bit. It's like getting free of bindweed.

Bloody I am also addicted to WhatsApp checking and we are in a small town so tend to run into each other on nights out etc... awkward!

@Ravenscloak god damn google!

Ginger well myself and my H are separating but we've had 17yrs of toxicness (Is that a word!). I'd just engage with him as little as possible. Maybe he likes the drama of the exchanges. It's fairly clear you don't so don't give him what he wants/craves.

Have to agree with Basseting there Ginger (I'm just catching up on the day) he is slowly beginning to make DOM sound like a gent. He is horrendous.

Basseting glad you got support from other parents. It is vital when your kids have additional needs.

Ravens you are so right to put such value on yourself. You are sounding fierce!

Ah Teens so sorry you're feeling like this. I can feel how hurt you are. It's absolutely horrible.

Anxious how are you? How's your H behaving?

Hi My and Belonger

61 photos found and restored.
Christ on a bike.
that level of upset is not good for me.

Can I have a glass of something strong please?

I know before you said your relationship with you H was/is similar. Last time I caught up with stuff on the last thread he wasn't taking it well (i went awol in the hope tjat my NC had miraculously changed into a kind, compassionate, supportive partner. I was deluded, obviously) - hows it going now?

That's brilliant @Basseting! And breathe xx

@Basseting

NK 'twilight years' (I'm only just 50 a few weeks ago)
Do you know something I dont?

user we all get negative at times ..it doesn't matter ! It's just life , part and parcel .

oldbrook This is a very valid point " It's probably really confusing for them if they are used to us acting a certain way then suddenly not." I was always there chasing him , offering myself up for when it suited him. I expect he is really surprised that I have not been in contact .

ginger F*ck him - he sounds like an arse !

basseting what a story - it sounds like a movie !!

seshi If he can't organise a phone then he doesn't deserve a place in your life !!

teens " there is no one around that could compensate for his absence.." he's another knob and you will feel better ..unfortunately it just takes time .

itsa well done on getting over Day 30 ..it does get easier somewhat, doesn't it ?

Teens what about some girlie nights out. You literally can't beat them or do a come dine with me with some friends!

Itsa so sorry things aren't going great for you. It's lovely to hear that you are over your NC. Gives us all hope I think.

Basseting hope you get the photos back. I don't have an iPhone but maybe give Apple a ring.

Seshi keeping my fingers crossed that he goes to the gig with you. It's not until the 23rd though is it?

Belonger well done you should be proud of yourself.

Bloody well if you have to go I'll need to exit left with you. I'm not even doing NC anymore! Good all on the Eggs Benedict

@Basseting you're only 2 years older than me. Never mind steptoe get out there and shake your tail feather!!!! He soooo doesn't deserve you.

NK hope all is going as well as it can in the circumstances.

belonger you sound so determined about it all yet realistic at the same time

Catching up with all of this keeps me off WhatsApp ! Please someone say to me " WTF are you looking at him on WhatsApp for ? It tells you bugger all other than that he is alive " ..maybe tomorrow I will try not to look !

Thanks very much for asking Ginger. He is currently in complete denial and I have no energy to bring it up with all that was going on workwise. The countdown to mediation is on and it's now 14 weeks I think. I will have to bring it up again but the thoughts of it.