The Fabulous Crown wearing cafe. No contact thread part 9...

[seshi]

Hello ladies for anyone attempting, going through or wanted to try No Contact. We don't judge on here... Just lots of lovely support and advice... Come join us

NK
I think both happiness and unhappiness/dissatisfaction are very contagious, one event followed quickly by otherevents and before you know it, it formed into a huge snowball that getting bigger and bigger.

So I think best way to deal with this is to try to calm down, meditate and convince yourself that all is well, you're safe , loved and appreciated and slowly things will be on the mend..exersise gratitude for what you have and you will have more to be greatful for..

That's my philosophy and it sort of works on me .Hugs ((()))

Teens what a beautiful post. Thanks so much you've made me cry (in a good way)

Yes teens a powerful post. Glad you are getting some recharge time.

Basseting he needs to step up. I know you said that your DC's prefer to be at your house but you do need some time. Sending loads of endurance

Seshi that is inspiring. I ran up the road with 2 of my DC's the other day and was out of breath so going to start again. It us annoting when they initiate then disappear. It is like a little like to keep you there. Annoying.

NK sorry about your Mum. I think there is a lot in accessing other relationships when you separate. I really saw my Dad in a new light when H left. Not a good light either. The controlling aspect of him that I had never thought about before. Has your Mum always been like that?

Oldbrook you really have come so far. Like teens says, that lightbulb moment, wingman, and you are done. He still hasn't realised you are serious. Can you use a blanket excuse of new job for the social events. That you need a couple of months to get on top of things. To hopefully stop any invites for a while?

seshi it was you that I sent my number to right?

Teens such a wise and true post, it made me cry too.

It's so true ... there are other things wrong with my life but difficult to know how to change it at this stage. I am massively skint and will be for another couple of months so it's hard at the moment to get new hobbies and interests going. My work is very tying and also isolating ... there are times in the last couple of months I would have killed for an office job with company and banter. I've lost nearly 2 stone in the last couple of months but too skint to go shopping for new clothes to make me feel better. I feel very stuck in a rut. Practically chain smoking, which I must kick but need the crux right now. Hopefully when the weather improves and my finances I will see opportunities and not just threats.

So the snow has arrived in bucket loads! Which means my 10k has been postponed. On a positive aspect it means I have more time to train but also means I have a full day ahead with no plans...... This makes NC so much harder...

Hi all.

Still very sick and anxious. I’m just upset all the time. I realise everything was one big lie now. If I finished with him the first time he cheated i would be in a much better place right now

@woss agree with @oldbrook regrets are pointless. You are bound to be feeling dreadful but it will pass.. This is the start of your road to recovery.... Each day you will get stronger. Keep posting... It helps @oldbrook you are right about plans changing... It does up skittles me a bit. I am still struggling to get into anything on the TV.... I still find my mind wondering. Need to find something really juicy to get into... Any recommendations?

Hi @seshi @teens my messages aren't getting through on WhatsApp - can you re-add me please? Only one grey tick

I know. I keep thinking that I didn’t keep him happy.
But he cheated on his ex wife with her friend. Caused an immense amount of damage.
Cheated on me in a spectacular way. Then started doing it again.
I should have known. When all of a sudden he gave up smoking and started talking about what other people do. These other people are normally people he has been trying to shag

@wossgoinon the pain is unbearable I know. Is it worth getting some counselling via your gp?

Day 38 here little reminder of what's supposed to be going on here Day 1 again of not looking at WhatsApp Last Seen !

Morning all. I agree with Oldbrook. Today is a new day and the start of a new chapter. We are never open to meeting someone decent if we are holding on to someone weak and abusive.

You are right. He was weak and abusive. God i feel sick

Breaking bad Seshi? Absolutely gripping! I grieved when I finished that almost as much as for NC 😂! Nothing compares! I'm watching GOT now but have seen about 5 episodes and it's so complicated... I don't get what all the fuss is about really.

I don't get GOT at all, too violent, dramatic and depressing. I don't want to hear about it at all and secretly judge people that love it as some sort of bloodthirsty maniacs in the making 😂

Morning everyone. Day 24 NC for me.

I’ve been looking at more ‘advice’ on how to get your ex back/get over a break-up and it seems you should really do NC forever. If it’s meant to be they will reach out to you, if not why do you want them. So I will continue for now to and past 30 days and at some point I should stop counting. It’s my DD’s birthday soon, I won’t break NC till after that in case he uses it as an excuse to text clutching at straws