The Fabulous Crown wearing cafe. No contact thread part 9...

[seshi]

Hello ladies for anyone attempting, going through or wanted to try No Contact. We don't judge on here... Just lots of lovely support and advice... Come join us

@itsa it did make me feel good yes... But I am trying to really lean back and not get my hopes up too much x

Welcome meow sounds like you’ve got the right idea.
Thank you everyone! It’s day 21 NC tomorrow - I will make it to day 30. You are all wonderful - and no more looking at his pictures!!
ginger he really can’t let you go can he!
oldbrook glad having left your old job is giving you calmness
seshi sound like you going NC has turned the tables - he’s coming to the concert, he misses you ... sounds like you have options - if you want them.
NK bloody user and everyone else, thanks for your comments! I love this thread

@ravens I love this thread too.... I think i would have sunk without it... I think its helped me muster up something I haven't had for ages and that's a bit of dignity

@seshi yes. Here's to dignity

Evening ladies,

Ginger - he is bullying you. I cannot believe he is turning your blood test into an opportunity for him. Did he book out the time so that you have to see him?

NK - I really understand the guilt you feel about H and how exhausting it is needing to again explain it is over. Just remember he chose to leave it too late to make an effort. 6 years is s long time to be so unhappy for. He made his bed. The mediation will help with this but I know 14 weeks us still a long time to go. What has happened on the job front? So pleased if is improving.

I love the pooches! Sorry i haven't been on much. I have read through everything and am with you all but too many to respind to individually. So busy as doing extra hours and kids seem to have so much on. H and his financial fuck up has got worse and as expected massively impacted on me and children. I have had a talk with him about 5 times in the last 2 weeks. It is draining. This us how he gets away with it as then i just can't face talking about it anymore, feel immense guilt and so he slips in again.

Lookalike has been initiating contact and wants to meet up. I am truly off NC wagon as even contacted true NC today. If he didn't think i was crazy before he definitely will now.

@anxiousnow lovely to see you. Have a glass of something nice. You too sound exhausted. There seems to be a common theme here which is entitled partners thinking they can do what they want while their paramours pick up the pieces. I'm sorry you feel a bit all over the place but not surprised you're in contact with NC(s) - I would too!!!

My ExH is still being difficult about money despite the fact we’ve been divorced a year! I got the email today - probably why I’ve had a bad day.

One of the things my NC said when he dumped me was that he had found supporting me through a particularly difficult time stressful and he wasn’t sure he wanted to. Despite saying he loved me, he couldn’t really cut it when it mattered. I’m not sure whether anything he said was true any more - it certainly doesn’t match his actions. I’m better off moving on I think, he’s tainted what we had now anyway.

Yes i agree. Having to be here means it is tainted in some way anyway. But, it doesn't stop it hurting. You deserve a man you wants to support you, and you him.

Oldbrook, I saw this yesterday and thought of you.

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And this is for everyone

Seshi - could you suggest to NC that you travel together if you are worried about him not showing? I love how you are pushing yourself into all these things. Warrior Queen.

Theparting- how funny old flame popping up when he might be of use to you. Good idea to wait a month. Shame that we are becoming programmed to expect the hurt and you weighing up which will hurt less.

I am up. Feel sick. And sick in the knowledge that he chose his phone over me. Why do I want the person to hurt me to comfort me.

How do I stop ? It’s like a constant ache

After everything. He cheated on me for a year and I still took him back. Then he does this. I have blocked him but still wanting him to contact me. How fucked up is that

Morning all hope everyone has a good day

Thought for the day

Hi anxious sorry to hear you sounding so when down by your husband and situation. Is it that which has made you reach out to nc? I think when over things feel difficult it is normal to want to reach out. You are not crazy and just don't care if that is what he thinks. I hope today is a better day for you. X

Morning everyone.... Hooe we are OK. @woss you sound like you have had a terribly anxious night. All of us on this thread have been there. Baby steps today. Just focus on getting through each hour today. Read all of our threads if you can. Try and get our for a walk, exercise today. It's all about practicing self care. How would you treat a friend if they were going through this...? Well that's how you need to treat yourself.

@parting I understand how you feel about replacing NC with your old flame.... And I completely get the thing about well if I get hurt it will at least mean that I am moving on from original NC. I have done this in the past.... In an odd way it can work but it can also be like adding a wound on top of an old one. Maybe enjoy the flirting and distraction but take your time. I am aiming to be totally happy by myself and not rely on a relationship to fulfil me.... I am not there yet by a long shot as I have always put so much emphasis on being in one... But I am realising that this is what makes me vulnerable. Be careful

@anxious I think I will ask NC if we can travel together. Going to wait to see if he reaches out to me again though first.

Gosh there are so many of us on here now it's hard to individually message everyone but just to say that you are all fab

@anxiousnow hope you are feeling a bit stronger today... Yesterday was hard for you but I think that you actually probably turned a bit of a corner xxx

Day 35 NC Day2 No WhatsApp Stalking Feel like crap though yesterday and today . Think it's just all tied into "how is my life going to be forward on from here ". That question was there before NC came into my life and has now returned . He was a diversion and I lost the plot there for a while thinking there was maybe a future with him in it .

I'm reading posts though. Good luck, everyone.

@Bloody you will find someone else..
.... You have loved before and you will again. Its all too easy to think they were your last chance. When is your date BTW?

Day 21 NC today. It feels like an age. Hope everyone has a good day today