Brave Babes (Hygge) Battle Bus: Snowed in and Drinking Hot Chocolate instead of wine

[SweetLathyrus]

Hi, I'm SweetLathyrus, Sweet for short, and I've been on and off Gerald the Brave Babes Battle Bus since 2014. Over the years, lots of us have maintained the thread, most of all the lovely Mouse, who has been here since the early days, and still scurries onboard when she can.

The bus is a place of support, safety and occasional silliness for those of us struggling with our relationship with alcohol. Some of us are sober, some are trying to be, some are moderating and aren't ready to give up alcohol just yet.

So whatever your reason for questioning the whys and WTFs of your drinking, hop on board, make yourselves comfortable and join in. Driers and Triers, all welcome.

2018 has been a busy year so far, lots of new travellers as well as old faces; if you want to read back on the journey through Dry or Dryer Jan and Feb so far, here's the link to the last thread

And in case you want to know how it all started, here is the link to JWN's original, inspiring thread

We've donned the snow chains, topped up the antifreeze, and turned the heaters up to loud, so even though it's cold outside, our welcome is always warm, so hop on and join us.

@flowersonthepiano I was just reading the entire thread - which I didn't do when I joined and got your post about the three dogs and renting - what about offering to pay extra deposit to have the dogs there? I found in the past many "no pets" places would waiver there no pets policy with some extra deposit being put down.

Afternoon babes and rothbury - I am not doing well this week. I can't seem to pull myself out of the rut from my daddy being poorly, me being overtired, client ridiculousness on a number of things last week, the snow and ice (which totally fucked my plans up from Thursday), this shitty contract negotiation which I'm now going to have to deal with, and some other stuff I can't divulge on here (it is not husband related - all is cool in that area).

Just went out for lunch with the parentals and totally lost all willpower / resolve and have drunk two peronis FFS.

Get a frigging grip. Am jumping in the car now to get back to London and am not looking forward to work this week at all. Anyway I'll stop moaning now.

Welcome new babes. xxx

Don't worry twat I am sure most of us would say our parents drive us to drink, even if they are lovely.

I totally empathise with the feeling overwhelmed. I don't have any good advice though. I love my job most of the time but I live in permanent fear of dropping a ball, and always have a long list of Things I Haven't Bloody Done.

Let's all say tomorrow is a fresh start. The snow has made us all a bit crazy, knocked us out of our usual routines and scuppered whatever plans we had. It was a diversion but it's over now.

I'm definitely up for a fresh start tomorrow Rothbury I've lost my way. Not drinking but feel crazy. Can't even blame the snow, there's none here....

Ah Twat (feels odd typing that!) parents can be the absolute limit sometimes - it's been an odd out of sorts week for people all round I think, cos of snow etc...courage mes braves and fresh start tomorrow...

Sequins - you can have a bit of my snow and we'll blame it on that! Or Rothbury might?

Hope all are well - just joined the bus on the end of last thread. It's 25 days for me today.

I ran myself physically into the ground and ended up in hospital with severe asthma, flu and a chest infection. So I had to stop smoking too, and I'm still on a reducing dose of steroids which make me feel weirdy 🙄

Had a close shave the other day when the boiler broke when it snowed and came home from work with son to a freezing house.

I was so close to walking to the shop to pick up some drinks and mounting a Basil Fawlty stylesque assault on the boiler that I can't begin to tell you... 😮

All was well in the end - I jammed on the bobble hat of sobriety and got through it...

Please may I have a massive hand hold for the next twenty minutes... I couldn’t call because my phone has work calls on it and I have to reclaim by giving itemised bill but I’m off (attempting again) to a Aa group...

Good luck Sock. You can do it! Once you get over the threshold you'll be OK. And remember, you don't have to talk - only if you feel you want to. Have everything crossed for you

Good call rothbury - I'm just going to restart on day 32 2018 tomorrow. It doesn't help I'm in my 3 week window between two holidays so I am definitely out of routine and my mindset is not where it should be at the mo!

Love to all - I love this thread :).

Back in town and watching the athletics on replay from the start. Our flat is now full of ski equipment - it appears to have taken over! I'm pretty much packed so if I'm tired at the end of the week I only have a couple of bits to shove in.

xxx

Good luck sock - sorry misread your post. xxx

Good luck sock I hope they are all lovely and kind.

If you don't like it you can leave.

I need a fresh start. hopefully will get back to work tomorrow and start to get some control of things again

Thank you, thank you. I did it (on phone so more later) much love

Aw well done Sock! Look forward to hearing about it later x

Ok, thank you so much everyone. I nearly bailed as there was a pub very close by - and I had to walk the long way home and avoid buying cigarettes as I knew I'd end up buying alcohol.

It was difficult (I'm not going to lie), it was wonderful to hear people sharing but some of it was hard to hear as well, particularly from the people who have been sober for a long time who are still struggling - I honestly thought about walking out at that point, but I have so much to lose if I don't do this.

Some people have given me phone numbers and taken mine as well.

I don't fully understand the steps or the meeting format, but it was quite empowering at the same time as being difficult.

Honestly, I'm glad I did it, and I am really grateful for all the support you gave me whilst I did it (and on my other thread as well). I'm now hitting the sugar hard again...

To everyone hoping for a new start tomorrow, I'm with you - I'm hoping tomorrow is easier than today for everyone.

Ps. what is with the pins?

Hi sock - do you mean pins at AA? If so I think they're for total days of sobriety...

Unlike me I think they insist on counting the sober days sequentially. I find that very perfectionistic so I'm just counting total days this year (but then I'm not trying to be entirely abstinent right now).

Well done you - that's a massive step. I have been there and no what it will take for you to do that. xxx

Well done Sock, sounds like it helped

Morning all - day 32 dawns (actual day not fucking around day). I'm very cross with myself for drinking on a Sunday pre-work. However it's done now and I can't take it back.

Feel shit and anxious this morning. Am expecting to have a difficult contract discussion today which won't resolve anything today but has to be said.

I'm up and at them...there's no point wallowing in bed. Have a good day all.

xxx

Morning,

It will be two weeks for me tomorrow. I worried I would last a day. I’ve had a few cravings but the posh fruit spritzers and odd AF beer has quenched that.
My PMS has been significantly better this month I’m using very weepy and all over the place. I’ve still been a bit grumpy but no where near as bad.
Coming to the end of a seven day stretch at work, and it’s been hectic so can’t wait for the break.

Welcome to all those who have recently jumped on board you’re in a good place here x

Twattage Hope you're day's better than you're expecting. That anxious feeling is grim. The ski clothes sound fab (my kind of colours) It won't be long until you're there.

Ma The weather looks awful. I'm not surprised the novelty's worn off. Once things go back to normal AF will come easier.

Jayne For me the longer I go the easier it's getting and the more satisfied I am with soft drinks. I'm kind of scared to drink at all now though in case I can't stop.

Flowers I hope the home situation is improving.

Welcome to Socks, Netflix, and NewStart

Hello to Lux, Sweet, Mint, Slings Rothbury and anyone else I've missed.

Nothing to report here. Still AF, don't want to go to work and tired.

Twattage you said last week or the week before your career has taken off since stopping wine. Talks that's the sort of thing I need to hear at the moment. On mother recovering (podcast) she talks about stopping drinking meaning she was able to finally get traction on her life. Hoping that happens here, always work hard but for lots of reasons taking a long time to 'take off!

Welcome to Socks, Netflix, and NewStart

Good for you sock about aa. I hope it helps I've wondered about aa.

Jayne congratulations you are doing great.

Anyone found by stopping alcohol longer term they are finding other things stepping in? My sugar in take is pretty awful at the moment. Wine was the greater evil so I've not worried but it just seems to be increasing so I need to be careful and start reducing.

I think I'd be in trouble if I got an injury and couldn't run. Wish I could just be a more chilled out person but can't seem to get there unless I run (or used to drink wine to switch off.)

Talks = thanks bloody auto correct

twattage hope your contract discussions are going better than expected!

Hope everyone else is having an OK day.

Hello lovely bus people. I have crept on and off the bus over the years but never staying long. May need a seat for longer this time. Can you help me please?

I drink too much wine and it is getting ridiculous. I have no off switch over a certain amount. Some nights i have no wine, some half a bottle then on a Friday i seem to go mad. Friday there was a bottle and a half, This happens too often. Some weeks i have no nights without at least a few glasses of wine. Enough is enough.

Thing is i feel crap. Proper crap. I feel like i have a virus. Sort of achey, not sleeping well, feeling very low and weepy. But i don't believe i have an actual virus as i am able to plod on and get things done. Is this normal? Have i wrecked myself? I fear for my liver. In fact i am terrified.

Has anyone got any words of wisdom for me? They can be kick up the arse words. That may be what i need.

Thank you.

Hi all. Thank you for the welcomes and sorry for not getting back sooner. I did get a little more sleep yesterday morning and felt tired and less crap than I deserved to feel for the rest of the day while DH did all the thinking and doing required for entertaining DD, feeding us all and clearing up.

I slept like a log last night and woke up with just the usual pang of guilt for being a rubbish wife and mother. Today I've pootled around with housework while putting off doing anything I need to do in relation to getting my business off the ground.

Bluesky your post sounds very similar to the way things are for me. No real words of wisdom, but we can get through this. I know that the background feeling of illness subsides when I've had a few consecutive AF days and an improvement in the weather will also give us all a boost. The sun nearly came out where I am today!

Evening All,

I'm sorry, I don't really know what happened. I've been feeling rough - pre-menstrual, migraine on and off for days, and struggling to catch up at work and anxiety through the roof. I pushed the fuck it button. It didn't even feel nice when I did it, a bottle Saturday and Sunday. I just wanted the world to shut up, but of course, it didn't. I've fucked up my 61 day sober run for nothing but a shed load of self-loathing and a lost weekend.

I'm AF today, I've applied for some on-line counselling, went to a meditation session at lunch time, and did an e-consult with the GP; but now the anxiety is so bad I've turned my phone off and I'm scared to look at my email. I'm a mess.