Brave Babes (Hygge) Battle Bus: Snowed in and Drinking Hot Chocolate instead of wine

[SweetLathyrus]

Hi, I'm SweetLathyrus, Sweet for short, and I've been on and off Gerald the Brave Babes Battle Bus since 2014. Over the years, lots of us have maintained the thread, most of all the lovely Mouse, who has been here since the early days, and still scurries onboard when she can.

The bus is a place of support, safety and occasional silliness for those of us struggling with our relationship with alcohol. Some of us are sober, some are trying to be, some are moderating and aren't ready to give up alcohol just yet.

So whatever your reason for questioning the whys and WTFs of your drinking, hop on board, make yourselves comfortable and join in. Driers and Triers, all welcome.

2018 has been a busy year so far, lots of new travellers as well as old faces; if you want to read back on the journey through Dry or Dryer Jan and Feb so far, here's the link to the last thread

And in case you want to know how it all started, here is the link to JWN's original, inspiring thread

We've donned the snow chains, topped up the antifreeze, and turned the heaters up to loud, so even though it's cold outside, our welcome is always warm, so hop on and join us.

He's back with peppermints and drinking ginger beer (non-alcoholic). Crisis over, for now. I can close Right Move and get on with this job (rock and roll Saturday nights here).

I think flowers I've found it hard to challenge when my own thinking about drinking has been so distorted. The longer I don't drink the more I realise how much of a hold it's hard on me and how dangerous it's been.

I really hope your dh didn't get any alcohol tonight.

Just seen no booze bought!! Really pleased.

Well done ladies :). Night night. xxx

Hello all. I'd like to clamber back on the bus, having been absent since the Autumn. I thought I was doing ok and stepped away from the bus as it was making me overly-conscious, if that makes sense?

Anyway, I have been awake since 3:45 and probably won't get back to sleep so will feel crap all day with fatigue and hangover. And the fear.

I will not drink again until I have 2 or 3 beers on Friday.

I had a sober spell, then moderated well for a good couple of months but consumption is creeping back up and this needs to stop.

Hello everyone. I've hopped on the bus a few times before so thought I'd say hello. Loving the hygge style. Six months sober last week. Snowed in so couldn't make it to my AA meeting and get my 6month chip which I was disappointed about. I get ridiculously excited about the small shiny things.

Not to sound all scaremongery Flowers but are you keeping an eye out for any secret drinking on your DH's part? If he wants to drink and knows you'll be annoyed he might start doing it secretly. I used to do that shit all the time. Hiding vodka in bottles of soft drinks. Ginger beer was a favourite because it has a pretty strong smell.

Snow's all gone here now. Weird (but very handy) how quickly it's all gone. There was tons of the stuff on Friday.

Oh and good luck Minnie!

Hi everyone, binge drinker here

I am binge drinking (4 cans or a bottle of wine) twice a week. I have 2 dc age 2 and 4, fed up of the recycling walk of shame, hangovers and major weight gain.

The worst of all is the anxiety and panic attacks, I drink because of them but they make it worse, at it’s peak I was getting totally pissed 4 times a week. I woke up this morning after going out with friends, I don’t know how much I drank but I woke up and I’d pissed the bed

That’s it really. Hoping I can stop drinking now

Just quietly saying hello as a few people heave recommended me this thread (thank you). I'm on day three - having had several failed attempts to moderate (and to quit to be honest).

I went to AA meditation for the first part last night (I tried to go to groups as well yesterday but didn't get inside the door). Today, I am feeling awful so am in bed with porridge and liver detox tea.

Does anyone have any recommendations for things to take to make it easier, make me feel better? I have to face work tomorrow (I do have some diazepam to take).

welcome to new and returning babes.
lots of help available on here for you - or will be when all the Babes check in. Having downed a bottle of wine myself yesterday I dont have much to offer.

Morning all.
Sockmobster nice to meet you. Sorry you're not feeling too well today. I don't have advice on what to take if you mean tablets? I guess my first

Sorry posted too soon. My first question would be is it safe for you to just stop? This depends on the amount you were drinking. If so I would suggest drinking lots of whatever non-alcoholic drink you fancy. You may need to up your sugar levels as you will have been consuming loads of sugar in alcohol.

Sockmobster just look after yourself, lots of treats, bath, clean sheets that sort of thing. Porridge is a nice comfort food, maybe a bit of honey on it? 3 days is a brilliant start. Well done

Sorry about all the separate posts but I'm slow at typing.
Hi Netflix welcome to the thread. I was a binger too to try to get rid of anxiety but it doesn't work as you have probably realised!! I would often wake up without remembering what the hell happened and what I drank. I have stopped this and the good news is that your anxiety will start to improve. What are your plans today?

I don’t have any for the day. I had a psychotic episode over Christmas and was given some diazepam for anxiety attacks, scared to take it because a lot of my anxiety is around taking pills. I drink instead and that helps while I’m doing it, sometimes I do things I regret a lot and feel so ashamed afterwards but they feel like a good idea at the time I am going to my first AA tomorrow. I’m 26 and don’t want to waste any more time feeling like this

Minnie hope you managed to get some more sleep. I know what you mean by becoming over conscious but I think I have had to really think about the drinking to make a difference but everyone is different.
Uggie fab news on 6 months, sorry you didn't get your 6 month chip, will you be able to get it when you next go?

Netflix just look after yourself today, that's something I didn't really do and really try to do it now. Drink lots of fluid to rehydrate, eat nice food, have a bath, clean sheets etc. Sounds like you are already focused and I hope the AA meeting goes well. Is there any today?
Your psychotic episode must have been scary. I don't have any advice on diazepam though as I have never taken it

Morning all,

Uggie I did think about that yes. He sometimes used to hide drink even when I didn't get angry about it ?? Anyway, if he did sneak something in the ginger beer (which I bought, so wouldn't have been a deliberate tactic) he didn't get pissed - I know when he's pissed. I'm not about to start policing him, there's no point. But if he starts again, I don't plan to stick around.

Sockmobster nice to see you over here , excellent suggestions from Sequins, I also found that sweeties/chocolate help as a 'treat' to replace the 'treat' poison of alcohol.

On the AA meetings, I haven't personally tried them, but have read on here of others who phoned the AA helpline, and they arranged for someone to meet them outside the meeting and go in with them. It sounds like that might be helpful to you? I also read that it's a good idea to turn up early, because there is usually some people outside waiting, or inside making tea/coffee.

Ma how are you this morning? Are you coming back on the nice warm Hygge bus out of that chilly sidecar? These green opal fruits are delicious

Hi Flowers good news on DH and the ginger beer btw. You must feel relieved.

Ma are you able to get out yet?

I'm going to yoga this morning, it keeps me sane

Morning all. Long time lurker here. Love reading about you all and get a lot of strength here.
flowers in the attic I can relate to you a lot. I was in the same position four years ago with my ex, he drank daily I'd say two bottles of red wine. Occasionally he'd attempt to cut it out but then I'd find hidden bottles down the sofa. He couldn't see an issue with this !, In the end I had to leave as relationship got very toxic. To this day he still drinks a lot by the look of him :( but know I just feel sad for him and what this may do to our son.
I was never a daily drinker but I'd tend to drink more to blot my feelings out. Nowadays I am moderating but I have to watch it carefully.
Hope we are all chugging along okay today. This weather is annoying ! Wanted to go and do a exercise class but it's shut ! X

Good morning babes and

After today I will be out of the sidecar and back on the Hygge Bus full time. Scary but has to be done. I was going to go to the shops today but I just couldn't be arsed to dress properly (leggings and scabby jumper here) and put my face on, so it's another day watching Phil & Kirsty and doing work and housework.

netflix welcome. You say you are scared of tablets, but there are tablets that would be far less harmful to you than alcohol that might help with your anxiety. You may have tried some? You may not get the right one first time. I absolutely bloody love diazepam but know how addictive it is for me so only take it if something REALLY bad has happened (about once every two years kid of thing)

I currently take duloxetine for my anxiety, just a small 30mg dose. I tried others before that but they had side effects I couldn't handle. This one is good for me. Do you have a sympathetic GP you could talk to?

Hello sock I hope you are feeling better. I have never been to AA but my cousin has completely turned his life around with it. Can you do some nice things for yourself? Paint your toenails, dust off your body moisturiser, face pack, that kind of thing?

I can see a pattern with some of us that we don't think we are worth it. We feel self indulgent when considering our own needs. Well fuck it, we are worth it.

twat I am sure you look fabulous in your ski gear. My cousins run a ski business on the French/Swiss/Italian border and they absolutely love the life. I have been once and didn't like the cold, although I did enjoy the skiing. Couldn't do it now!!!

Ma I really feel for you. I wish I could give you a big hug. Would it make you feel better to make plans/spreadsheets that kind of thing? Or indulge in some online property or holiday porn?

Sorry for the long post - off to do some work now.

I just lost a big long ranty post. Probably just as well. It is STILL snowing. I actually think I'm going to go mad

@Sequinsofcourse I hope it's safe to stop, this is day three. I am questioning that myself, but I have been told because I was going one day drinking, one day not drinking, one day drinking, one day not drinking etc. it would be OK. I had reduced quite a lot as well... The thing that I have found difficult with professionals is that most didn't think it was a good idea to stop because it was largely self-medication and they said that they would be concerned for my mental health. At the same time, it's alcohol has almost totally ruined my life (combined with mental health problems and having some twits in my life). They were much more for the moderation idea, but every week I screwed it up at least once - it just doesn't work for me - and the knock on effects have become quite serious as it started to impact my day-to-day life severely.

Like netflix, anxiety is my biggest reason to drink.

Today, I have been for a walk, been out for brunch (I wanted Sunday Roast, but all pubs around here so I went for brunch instead, have watched a film, have an essay due tomorrow but I am trying to put that off to later as can't think straight.

I am looking into some things I can help to get my liver / kidneys back in shape (actually my liver function tests were perfect but I know my body is not in good shape because I feel like shit most of the time). Drinking lots of water, have had a liver detox tea, and had some prunes on my porridge.

I am now back in bed, there's an AA meeting at 17:00 and I am going to see how I feel - there's one tomorrow night after work too. I will try calling tomorrow if I don't go tonight and seeing if someone can meet me there.

@rothbury I may do the face mask suggestion above this afternoon as a treat to myself, and buy myself some flowers.

@flowersonthepiano Thank you for the welcome, nice to be here - hope I can just manage to stay.

@Netflixandchill we have quite a bit in common and are at similar stages. I have found the diazepam helps the anxiousness at night (mine is evening related usually, although this morning I woke up anxious). I wish I'd asked for something to help me sleep though.

@Newstartforme2018 Which exercise class do you do? A poster has suggested i join one so looking for a good suggestion!

Hope everyone has a nice afternoon, thank you for all the support and suggestions.

Hello, welcome Netflix Newstart and Sock you'll find lot's of friendly help and support here.

Ma you must be going stir crazy, all that snow.

Not much to report from me, busy with work, lot's of ideas in the pipeline. Losing weight slowly, continuing to try to look after myself well and quite surprisingly as I said I never wanted to go anywhere near a man again after I left my ex, I'm starting to think a male friend might be quite nice after all. Where does one find a nice chap these days? Funny how I spent all those miserable years with a miserable WB and now it's like he never existed for me. Freedom is good.