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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Met a guy, do I message him or not?

261 replies

paleontologist22 · 25/02/2018 23:00

Early last week I had an overnight stay at a hotel in town due to a works event. In the residents bar at night, I got chatting to a guy who was also there on work. We hit it off and got on like a house on fire. Around 4am he said he had to get some sleep as had to be up early. I said bye to him but he said he would see me at breakfast and maybe we could swap phone numbers then and keep in touch. I ended up sleeping straight through breakfast and therefore never saw him again.

Now I know his full name, and I've found him on social media (yes I googled him!). Would it be really stalkerish of me to send him a quick message? Just to say something like oh thanks for keeping us company, let me know if you're ever in this part of the country again?

Or do I just leave it and forget about him? I mean he was just a guy. And he actually lives in another country so I don't think anything would ever really happen but I just haven't been able to stop thinking about him and how well we got on or even how attracted I was to him!

OP posts:
Trailedanderror · 09/03/2018 11:43

Yay! Fortune favours the brave. 💪🏼

topsy2tails · 09/03/2018 12:00

Yay!! SmileSmile

Merrz · 09/03/2018 12:02

I would message him. You could always just say sorry you didn't catch him in the morning but you slept through breakfast and just wanted to say thanks for a lovely evening. After all it was really you that stood him up. If he doesn't reply then hey but what have you got to loose, it's not as if you're likely to bump into him again and it be awkward?!

Merrz · 09/03/2018 12:04

Ooops sorry i only read the 1st page Blush
Yay that's great news, you never know what the future holds. How far away does he live? ie Amsterdam or Australia?

SuperSkyRocketing · 09/03/2018 12:10

Love this update!

paleontologist22 · 09/03/2018 15:13

America Confused

In all honesty I didn't think this was the start of a blossoming relationship. I'm just getting out of a divorce and he obviously lives in a different country but we are both enjoying spending time together and talking, making each other laugh. The few hours we've had together have been brilliant and that's all I'm holding on to!

OP posts:
SmileyBird · 10/03/2018 00:58

So glad you messaged him!!!

letsdolunch321 · 10/03/2018 01:16

Well done for messaging him. As long as you both enjoyed it that be the main thing.

TakeThatFuckingDressOffNow · 10/03/2018 06:26

Thanks for the update!!!!

Well done for messaging. Grin 💗💗💗

PLFDiDi · 10/03/2018 07:03

Yipee being brave paid off 💪💪😁

GreenMeerkat · 10/03/2018 07:11

For heaven's sake do it!

If he finds it stalkerish, he won't message you back and you won't see him again. Big deal.

If he messages you back then great!

What do you have to lose? Go for it

GreenMeerkat · 10/03/2018 07:12

That'll teach me to not scroll to the bottom of a thread. Doh!

But yay, glad you messaged him and it worked out!

paleontologist22 · 02/04/2018 06:25

Just in case anyone was interested in another update...

He went back to the US. We had a lovely little time together and still plan on keeping in touch but I don't see the relationship going any further simply due to the distance. He'll be back in the country in a few months time again so we have provisional plans to meet up again but who knows.

Thanks MN for pushing me to message him the first time, we've both had an amazing albeit short time together! Smile

OP posts:
Milomonster · 02/04/2018 10:59

Gorgeous thread! So glad you messaged him. This would be my dream scenario (thinking of all sorts of scenarios as I come out of a divorce). Please please update in a few months when he’s back. Who knows - you may end up traveling there before he comes back?

paleontologist22 · 02/04/2018 18:09

Thanks @Milomonster! Not sure about travelling there.. I'm just coming out of a divorce and not sure I could handle another huge life move! He does come back to the UK once every 3/4 months or so and we have put stuff in the diaries with regards to meeting up. Let's just see how it works with the time difference and stuff!

OP posts:
paleontologist22 · 30/09/2018 00:23

Not sure if anyone will read my update but I just came across thus old thread of mine.

We kept in touch over the summer, a few messages every few days or so. No pressure, just friendly messages back and forth. He's now back in the country and we've just arranged to meet again next weekend Smile

OP posts:
SnipSnipMisterBurgess · 30/09/2018 00:29

That’s lovely! I love nice updates.

That said ... don’t put your life on hold. Are you dating generally?

eaturveggies · 30/09/2018 01:31

That's lovely Smile

Aridane · 30/09/2018 01:43

I remember -thanks for the update

paleontologist22 · 30/09/2018 01:50

I wouldn't say I'm actively looking and dating. I got divorced late last year. After so many years of being married, so I'm very much enjoying being free and single, this is just a lovely little bonus!

OP posts:
heartyrebel · 30/09/2018 02:26

Lovely update Grin

SpoonBlender · 30/09/2018 02:37

Hurrah! Go you :)

Milomonster · 30/09/2018 08:02

I followed this - how wonderful!
Did you meet any other interesting people in between? I recall you saying youbjust came out of a divorce (similar to me)?
Please please update after you meet!

MontalbanoFan · 30/09/2018 08:52

Lovely thread, OP. I’ve got a lovely, warm glow after reading this.
Best wishes for the future Smile.

bigchris · 30/09/2018 09:17

Awww what a lovely thread just shows it sometimes worth taking the bull by the horns

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