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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dilemma on this weird Tinder situation

482 replies

Tyrianstoe · 13/01/2018 17:34

Had to nickname change as I'm a regular and to be fair I'm embarrassed. Split up with my ex 2 weeks ago (his fault, broke my trust) and in a fit of anger and suspicion set up a Tinder account on Thursday night to see if he's on there as that's where we met. Anyway, was swiping through and I saw this lovely looking guy who had a very funny profile that mentioned a very obscure band that I love so swiped guiltily right. Don't know why I feel bad because my ex is a lying arsehole, but I'm aware it's too soon. This guy messaged me! So I said 'I like that band loads, nobody has heard of them' and we swapped messages. Then I thought I'm being a bit of a dick here so I deleted my Tinder but said if he wanted to message me off there he could and gave him my number. Thinking he wouldn't.

He found me on WhatsApp. He was telling me about his little boy who is going for an assessment for a disability, I write the assessments as a job so he was asking me what to expect. Then, this is where it gets weird...he asks me where I come from. Told him. He's from the same town. Not too weird. So asks where I live now, I live in another town not far away. He moved to my town 5 days ago. This morning he mentioned he lived opposite an emergency services station. So do I. He told me the name of his street. My house looks onto that street! I can see his house from mine.

So I do t know whether this is just too bizarre and I stop messaging him but...I don't want to! He seems sound. He doesn't use any words on my banned list, is retraining to do a job I'd love to do, likes the same music, doesn't put xxx on anything, doesn't use lol and doesn't call me Hun/babe Grin I'm mad aren't I? This has got big fat rebound all over it. But my interest is piqued. Slap me with a wet fish!

OP posts:
OverTheParapet · 18/01/2018 19:16

Bow chica a bow wow!

TheMogget · 18/01/2018 19:21

Gaaah how lovely, he sounds really nice and not a dickhead which is always a bonus!

Jellybean2017 · 18/01/2018 19:25

This is a lovely thread! Hope all continues to go well 😊

Tyrianstoe · 18/01/2018 19:29

It's very nice that he's making contingency plans. I dunno if it's just because he wants a shag but if he does...fine by me! I'm really changing my attitude to all this stuff. Keeping it simple.

OP posts:
Tyrianstoe · 18/01/2018 19:33

I don't feel angsty. I'm not waiting for him to text but when he does I just text him back, none of that wait an hour shit. I am not thinking of where this could go. I'm not analysing his feelings or mine. It's just really fun. Weirdly fun.

OP posts:
DavidBowiesNumber1 · 18/01/2018 19:35

You deserve to be happy and it sounds like your new beau certainly ticks all the boxes Flowers
Have a lovely time tomorrow night, whatever you end up doing....... Wink

TheSassyAssassin · 18/01/2018 19:40

Good. No stupid rules or silly games. Just natural. As it should be Smile

ClareB83 · 18/01/2018 20:03

Good stuff! The only guy who didn't play games with me is the guy I'm marrying in 9 days!

Tyrianstoe · 18/01/2018 20:49

clare WOW!! That is excellent! Congratulations. Are you all ready for the wedding? Have a great day!! Flowers

OP posts:
HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 18/01/2018 21:07

Damien Lewis' kids used to go to the same school as my friend's kids. Apparently he would cause complete chaos on the school run with all the mums trying to get a glimpse Grin

Poor bloke though, imagine not being able to take your kids to school for fear of causing mayhem.

Pandoraphile · 18/01/2018 23:44

Hearts - we've got Tom Hardy as a parent at our school!

MinceAndTatties · 19/01/2018 01:18

You're NEVER too old for the good things in life!

I had lots of partners in my teens and twenties, then an 18-year relationship which ended in 2013. I can't tell you how surprised and fucking delighted I was to discover the best sex of my entire life in my relationship after this :D

Tickety7 · 19/01/2018 02:07

Awwwww, what a fantastic thread, OP.

Go get you some of that ginger love!

ClareB83 · 19/01/2018 07:58

I'm pretty much sorted OP for the wedding OP. Apart from the wedding dress. They ordered the wrong size so now I'm waiting for a replacement to arrive from Holland.

Other than that...

Tyrianstoe · 19/01/2018 08:33

Oh god clare fingers crossed it comes quickly...

Very snowy and icy this morning and more snow due today where I live. Hope I don't get stuck at work. Meeting number four tonight in 8 days of knowing each other Shock

OP posts:
Tyrianstoe · 19/01/2018 08:35

Tom Hardy doing the school run? I can't imagine the chaos Grin

OP posts:
ClareB83 · 19/01/2018 08:39

I think it'll be OK. Otherwise they'll just have to get creative letting out the small dress. Something will get sorted.

And wooo 4th meeting. I love that 'can't wait to see each other feeling'. I still count the hours sometimes.

TheSassyAssassin · 19/01/2018 10:49

we've got Tom Hardy as a parent at our school!

Pandoraphile you've also just gained yourself a new BFF who is entirely happy to help with all school run favours...Me!! Grin

Will raise a glass of wine to you later Tyrianstoe, hope you have a fab time being snow-bound Wink

Pandoraphile · 19/01/2018 11:24

He doesn't do the school run, just turns up to events. He wears a baseball cap and normally has his baby strapped to his chest.

Most embarrassingly, when his child had just started at the school, I saw him standing alone in the playground looking a bit confused. Had no idea who he was back then and I assumed he was a new gap student and asked him if he was all right and did he need to be somewhere. He was very polite and reassured me that he was fine 🙈

I've also spoken to him and shook his hand at a school event. I pretended I didn't know who he was and he's just lovely. As is his g/f. So down to earth.

TheSassyAssassin · 19/01/2018 11:40

Love that you thought he was a student! And nice to hear he's a decent bloke Smile

MoNigheanDonn · 19/01/2018 12:12

OMG you fox (sorry didn't check in before now!)

I think I'd forget the cinema and just go for the wood burner and Netflix Wink

Abouttoblow · 19/01/2018 16:39

I second Mo

Woodburner and Netflix definitely!

TheSassyAssassin · 19/01/2018 18:12

You dug your nice pants out yet Tyrianstoe ? Grin Hope you have a lovely time Smile

DancesWithOtters · 19/01/2018 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sosog00d · 19/01/2018 18:34

Netflix and wood, more like 😝

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