An update on my 'To top off my crap year...' thread

[October]

Message withdrawn

i was serious!

Oh, ok - saddo

i am i am

Went to WW tonight. I was 12 st 4lbs (although I normally attend a morning meeting and don't eat before I go, so would be 3-4lbs lighter than that). I knew it would be that bad but am thoroughly pissed off that I let it get so bad. My goal weight last time (in the morning, on an empty stomach!) was 8st 7lbs, so I need to lose over 3.5 stones. I am just so stupid to have let it get back to this. I know the depression and my crap year (what with h and my mum) has contributed, but most people eat LESS when they are unhappy! I just trough in .

I'm a fat pig. Was moaning about having had to take ds with me and h said that I choose to work and have my sewing course, so I will have to put up with taking ds to the only meeting that I can get to

Bollocks, bollocks, bollocks

And my new ADs are giving me the 'two-bob bits' which is not good

I was having such a bright week too...

YOU ARE NOT A FAT PIG AND I DONT WANT TO HEAR YOU SAY THAT EVER AGAIN!

i've put on weight too btw, i'm not overweight but it hasnt helped my mood, but it's horrible to hear you call yourself that

you know you could lose 10 or 11 stone by dumping your h , lol

I would be happy to get back to 9 stones tbh. I think that is a manageable weight for me. Don't feel in the mood for dieting AT ALL but need to. My knees are hurting for the first time ever and I am feeling breathless all the time, which is very worrying!

And I feel 'burly' which I hate. I look down and see myself as a slim person. Then, I catch a glimpse of myself in a window and freak out.

Going to bed now but thanks for listening Lou.

i'm not liking my tummy v much atm

but dont put yourself down so badly, please, it's self defeating

night night x

hello, just caught up after being on hols for a week.

12 stone is NOT that bad, getting yourself a SW or WW mag, they always have someone in who is thrilled to be down to 13 stone from 20 stone or something.

Oh Dior - "burly" is exactly how I feel! I weigh about the same as you but I must be shorter as I am definitely a size 16.

I was pear shaped before having DD, now my belly is still huge and hangs over my clothes. thats what Ive got a complex about - most women with a belly have nice slim legs, but Ive still got my tree trunks as well as the belly!

I gave up WW as the leader was bigger than me, and used to do that sucking through her teeth thing if I put on a lb - I wanted to shout at her had she not heard of menstrual cycles and water retention FGS! It got so bad that not only would I always go for a pee before weigh in, Id take my chunky silver necklace off too

Im a bit resigned to it now, although ive got a glass cabinet at the top of the stairs, so every time I go up them I have to look at the matronly figure I dont recognise as me plodding up them.

I also comfort eat (badly) and have no will power at all.

I think I might lose weight when DP leaves as I wont have to eat meat and 2 veg meals with him, I can even go veggie if I want to.

Thanks everyone. I know what you say MTS - it is all releative. Now it has become about my health too though as I am breathless and have painful knees. The other thing is that I am so pissed off with myself for having gained all the weight that I lost. I know it went on slowly and that I have been struggling with a lot of things lately, but I am just so cross at myself.

H just rang me to see how I am today, because I had to come home yesterday and was fed up. SO he is not all bad I suppose

And Fubsy - I have 'chicken drum stick' thighs!

Just popped in to say that I have met my new boss. He is one of these 'I want you to create and expand your role and I'll let you do as much training as you feel you need' people - FAB! I also got a £1.50 pay rise which takes me from craopla-ish money to fairly decent wage for the area. I can't expect more for doing four days a week, part-time and term-time only!

I'm skipping around and have eaten well today too...

And h has been really positive about the pay rise. And G has spoken to me today. The only problem is that I realise that I do still fancy him, but I am not going to act on it. I am glad that he is being friendlier.

Hey well done glad work is turning out so well. Congratulations on your pay rise they obviously value your work. You just made me with your comment about G. Just catching up on this and think it has been fairly obvious that you still fancy him

Any news of when your Relate appointment is?

Hey well done glad work is turning out so well. Congratulations on your pay rise they obviously value your work. You just made me with your comment about G. Just catching up on this and think it has been fairly obvious that you still fancy him

Any news of when your Relate appointment is?

Great news
So pleased that you're sounding so much more positive and things are looking up xx

good news

Bluesky - no news on the appointments. I wish they would hurry up. H is trying to be nice again, but I get the feeling it is because I have hit another lowish patch. This time last week he was being an arse and I was happy (coincidence?) I think there is a lot to say, and I am gradually coming to the realisation that we are never going to be more than companions. Tanee mentioned this in one of her earlier posts and I felt so sad when I realised that the word covered our situation exactly.

OK, so it obvious that I still fancy G . Yes, I do - but I don't fancy his wolfish side. I am really glad that things are becoming easier to deal with in the office and that we are able to discuss things a bit more openly (work only though). It has been hard during the last two months and I have pulled though. At least I haven't cried over him for a couple of weeks, which is good .

Spoke to my current boss this afternoon, and he said that the new boss was complimentary about me and could see me managing an office for him in the future. Admittedly I did tell him that this was my plan when ds is older, but he seems open to it, which I am glad about.