how do you know when you have enough children

[lovemybed]

have 2 gorgeous dds just turned 5 and 3, love them to bits they are everything to me but im totally mixed up about having another,

have just started back at work which i am loving, enjoying being more independent, not having sleepless nights and its a lot easier to go away for a few nights with out worrying about feeds travel cots etc but there is a huge part of me that wants another one.

i suppose i might feel this way after having a 3rd though, so what i mean is how do you know when you are making the right choice not to have anymore, is it just normal for a woman to always want more children or do some people know when enough is enough.

9 children eh? I think ideally we'd all start younger then. Say, in our teens.

I would go on and on and if I'd started younger at want at least 6 kids.

I reguarly argue with Dh that he could drive a people carrier with the kids and I could have the tiny orange MG convertiable that I've always hankered about, giving me some 'me' time. Not very environmentally sound though and Dh hates people carriers. The car and transport issue is a big factor for us especially as we live in a rural location, you have to drive to get anywhere.

madamspud so sorry to hear your story, it must be so dificult wanting another child but knowing what damage it could do to you, you must feel so lucky to have your one ds.

just out of interest (i know it is a personnal question) have you and your dh ever thought about other ways of having another dc, like adoption etc.

I've four beautiful boys, and it has taken me ages to accept that that is my lot.
There are so many reasons not to have nay more - cost (school fees in particular), cars (what if pg no5 is twins), my age - i'm 43, and my uterus was ruptured by a careless gynae when DS4 was 1 so almost certainly wouldn't support another pg. But it's only the past 6 months or so that i have really felt happy that 4 is enough - DS1 has hit teenagerdom hard, and is a bit tricky at times, but also we have finally regained a bit of our lives, go out together occasionally just as a couple, and I've stared doing loads more riding again. I know now that I really am not prepared to go back to the babystage again, but it doesn't stop me nicking every passing baby for long cuddles

I have never known that enough was enough, i just had to wait for my body to tell me!!At 48, i have 12 children and would happily have more if I could.My youngest is nearly 3 and was going to be missing having a wee one being around but am now looking forward to my first grandchild at the end of the year. I LOVE having a big family, it's hard work but great fun....always noisy and you learn to share!!My kids are great and I dont think that they've missed out on anything so to anyone considering it...go for it if you can....and enjoy!

I have two dds. I would have another one but im too old, too tired and too poor. I'm one of 4 and i wish my dds could have had some extra siblings in case they dont get on when they grow up.

I have a 2 year old dd and a 5 week old ds and would love to have lots more, although I hated pregnancy this time it is amazing how quickly you forget. I can't imagine ever not feeling broody as I have always been, my dh and I have agreed that we will have 3 and I'm sure I'll be really sad once we're finished.

cheaperbythedozen - respect for you having 12 children - I have three and can barely manage those.

What a woman!

I felt so desperate for a 3rd it consumed almost every waking thought.
It was a nightmare anf after 15-16 months of me begging and pleading DH agreed.

It was fantastic to be pg again and i loved every mintue of it.
Ds3 was to be my baby forever

Then almost a year to day ago I fell PG again. If you search my name you'll see I was an absloute mess throughout the whole PG. It was so unplanned that it sent me doo-lally.

Ds4 is a perfect baby(evidence of this statement on my profile ), he's a delight and the older ds's all adore him. Initially I felt i could do it all again because ds4 is so wonderful I just wanted it to continue but just over the last few weeks I'll finally felt that feeling of "I'm done...my childbearing years are over" and I feel that without feeling sad at never having my own newborn to hold....well, ok maybe just a little bit sad

I've got an all consuming urge to have another-just keep feeling more and more broody I had no idea i would feel like this so soon (dd is only 9 months on monday)

She was unplanned and a huge shock to us both so even the mention of another to dp sends him funny.

The thing is i'd love 3 or maybe 4 and i'd hate a really large age gap between them all..............just need dp to realise that!!!!

At the moment though just dreaming about a magical no2

Any persuasion techniques taht work well

I have four children and am currently ttc number 5!

I always wanted three but did think there would be a pink one in there somewhere! I have three fab boys but the moment for me was when my husband said if I got pregnant again I would be a single mother of four boys! He is very easy going and not demanding so put like this I thought I would quit whilst I was ahead! Also, around the same time as him talking vascectomy my sister phoned on new years eve at midnight from a party in london and asked what we were doing - I was standing in the bathroom with a bucket of sick from one child and my husband hot on my heals with a bowl of sick from another - Ok - it was just a virus, but a one of those "what am I diong!" moments!!

sammy my DH really didn't want a third 9when I suggested it his response was "you must be joking!!!")

I waited anotehr 2 years then explained I'd been thinking about it for the two years since our conversation and the feeling wouldn't go away. Said that if he didn't agree I would always regret not having a thrid and would possibly resent him for not agreeing. He had a think then erelented

I have three boys oldest 5 tomorrow, middle one 2 and half, youngest 6 weeks, when had first felt had to have second as wanted him to have a brother or sister but wasn't particularly broody but also had PND, after second from day one craved another one didn't feel done, now i've had my third I think i'm done could do the baby bit again and again but finding the constant squabbling of the older two very draining.

I'd love more. At least two more but don't think I could do it. I'm so very tired and that first year stuff knocked me out. Not sure my body/mind/health would be up to it.

Hi I have 2 beautiful babies Megan 2 and Harry 7 months. I am desperate for another (I always wanted 3) but financially I don't think we could manage. I need to work and rely on my Mother in law for much of my child care - It might be easier in a few years but not sure if once all the nappies and sleepless nights are out the way I would want to start over! Very broody though I love giving birth and new babies DH is very scared

Always knew I wanted 4,never felt complete with 3,always felt I would have another,but DH not as keen! Reached 38 and decided 'now or never',thought we would try and see what happened.Igot pregnant straight away,DH somewhat surprised!
Has been difficult in view of age gaps,DD1 17,DS11,DD2 7, DD3 18 months,but now feel complete.No desire for number 5! It is the thought of all these teenage years ahead that worries us!

I guess you always know when you've had enough. I had two beautiful daughters, both as good as gold, but have no desire whatsoever for any more. After I had the first child I knew I wanted another. Now that I have no. 2, all broody feelings are long gone. If you're wondering whether or not to have another one, listen to your heart (and your pocket).

I had 3 ds from my first marriage and constantly felt broody. Met my wonderful dh and he wanted kids. Soon we had a dd and a bit later a ds. At last the broody feelings were gone and my family was complet......however..... while on the pill and still bf my 18mth ds I have discovered I'm pregnant again! Shocked but happy and dh is over the moon ..... so what's a half dozen kids?