The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Braving The Wine Witch & Her Alcohol Free Autumn

[Mouseface]

Hello

I’m Mouse one of the Brave Babes who ride on this wonderful Bus, called Gerald, along with all the Opal Fruits wrappers and of course Barry The squid.

We all have a wise variety of life experiences and experiences with alcohol too. We’re not admirers of hang overs and we certainly don’t do judgey pants!

We’re here to ride along with you, when life is pants but also when it’s not as well and you my want to celebrate that bit too much!

So find a seat and come take a ride. I’ll link the previous and also the very first link and the reason we’re all here.

*Mouse

Hello all you gorgeous babe's....
What a long thread and what a varied bunch we are, thank God for that! All united in our desire to stop drinking. Since I joined this thread I have felt heartened to know that I am not on my own, that my behaviour is similar to that of other people and that there is always hope and a way out. I'm so sorry I can't name check anyone or everyone but I'm running round after little ones and trying to sort tea and make house look like actual grownups live in it before my dh gets home. So apologies for short post. Massive thank you to all who encouraged me the other night, I really was feeling v low. You all helped me
I'm on day 16 of no alcohol here.

Went for a run last night in the dark and cold (which I hate) and within a 6 miler I got a pb for 5k only been slogging away at park run with virtually identical times every week, out on my own not even thinking about it and I pb
So...... someone mentioned a positive list for NOT drinking...I honk we should start one so we have a good long list for Friday and Saturday night!!!

The Positive Points to not drinking!!!!

More clarity a of thought.
Able to reassess many things.
Eat less.
Clear head in mornings.
Will probably lose a few pounds in the beginning.
No more embarrassing drunk crying sessions to anyone who will listen, instead honest conversations about feelings.

There's my two-penneth -worth. ....
Can someone more technical (I'm so not) make a list we can add to? Lol it can be our santa list for the sober minded......

Hi all just checking in! Felt very down today and still recovering from this filthy cold. Had a pint at lunchtime but on the tea now and staying clear of the wine tonight.

I'm considering speaking to my go for support - any advice or suggestions?

Very vainly, my looks change quite drastically when I drink, I get really puffy and there is a pinched look under my eyes that I absolutely hate. I lost 37 lbs by giving up the wine and so many people thought I had lost more and I know its because of the lack of bloat - I have been a lot lighter on the scales before but people haven't commented as much as before I was always drinking reguarly. The red face is also a pet hate of mine and furry teeth - need to brush them constantly when I am drinking regularly, my blood pressure rises (have managed to come off medication in the last year.....). I get heart palpitations when I drink, my resting heart rate increases, I eat far more crap, sleep is all over the place, less motivated, don't exercise at all, anxious and can feel quite low.....the list is endless and makes me wonder why on have I kept at it for so bloody long!

Evening babes.

Day 2 here. Off out to bingo tonight with a friend. She is picking me up but I made clear I'm not drinking.

I felt OK today so of course it popped in to my head that it would be fine to drink tonight. One wouldn't hurt.

I won't do it because I'm starting to hate the way it makes me feel. I don't want to be that person any more. I want to have conversations with my kids on a morning instead of dragging myself around like a half person.

Positives of not drinking

Not bloated
Stomach doesn't make frigging awful noises
No palpitations at bedtime
Can concentrate
More energy
Better parenting
No diarrhoea/constipation/both at same time
Get more done at home
Better at job
Better sex
Take more care of appearance
Less takeaways and shit food
More tea
More water
Better diet
Can read books and remember what I read
Feel calmer
Not angry with myself
Not ashamed/guilty

That's quite a lot of reasons! May treat myself to a fizzy pop tonight.

I don't think I could do this without you all.

I can't namecheck you all, Mshoolie, bee, Spanna, sleep, ginger, Lou, but you are all with me and I hope vice versa.

I've joined you tonight :). My first AF night in a long time. I'm s o tempted but I have no wine in, and I have one child in bed so I can't go out. I've attacked the ironing pile and waiting for my husband to get home. He'll be pleasantly surprised to arrive home T o me drinking tea Rather THan HOlding A Glass OF Wine.

Bee and Razor we love a list Beaches is our queen of lists, aren't you babe?

Chiara good to see you back. My DD1 (now 18) suffers with depression and anxiety this started when her dad left approx 7 years ago (and got worse) When she was 14 we went to doc for help and were referred to CAMHS, waited for over a year for her appointment, the counsellor she finally got to see announced in her first appointment that she was leaving in March to retire (this was Feb) she was beside herself (what's the point in opening up to this woman when she's leaving etc - I couldn't agree more) so I found a private counsellor who was recommended to me. (£45 for 50 mins, couldn't afford it, ended up taking a second job to pay for it) DD1 finished her gcses (actually did better than she thought she would) then went to college to do A levels. Over this time she'd started to self harm, was suicidal, it was truly awful and I felt totally helpless. I took 2 months off work because I really thought she wasn't going to be alive when I got back. The doc wouldn't prescribe her antidepressants because she wasn't 18 (I fought and fought with the Doc and finally saw a different Doc just before she was 18 and got what DD1 wanted all along). She did her first year and managed to get 3 AS levels, all D's (she'd done zero work) and decided to drop out of college all together. DD1 has always been a gamer and very into her head - not outgoing, shy, doesn't say much, doesn't make friends easily, has struggled with her sexuality (she came out to me when she was 14 - she hadn't told me because she was worried about how I'd react - when she did tell me and I was absolutely ok with whoever and whatever she wants to be and is - she was like, oh FFS mum if I'd known you'd have been so cool about it I wish I'd told you years ago. From this - she confides so much more in me (I'd have never talked to my mum about stuff she talks to me about) Me being sober has helped enormously - because I'm 'with it' and much more conscious of how she's feeling.
sorry this has turned into an essay - I will get to the point - last summer I found a place called DV8 they are everywhere (ours is DV8 sussex) it's aimed at teens who have not coped (for whatever reason) with the traditional A levels, btecs etc - DD1 is doing game development and at the same time retaking her maths (has managed to get a D 3 times) It's very relaxed, really small classes.
Maybe something like this would suit you DS? Sorry for the mammoth post Chiara I just wanted you to know that you're not alone and if I can help by telling you my experience or you want to PM please do

Chiara DD did the Princes Trust (Team) programme before she went on to do DV8, it took a lot of persuasion to get her to the initial meeting, she did it and gained a bit more confidence, this may be an option?

Evening babes,
Big fail here.
I’ve done 6 weeks of 4 days AF, Monday - Thursday, really proud of myself, had decided this was the way forward, the future.
Yesterday, for some stupid reason I had a bottle and a half of wine. And then the same tonight. I’m an idiot. I felt like shit this morning and am sure I will do tomorrow.
Idiot idiot idiot

@Slingsanderrors been there, done that. Tomorrow is a new day and this doesn't mean you've failed.

AF tonight as jst back from London and feel sick when I fly. Much prefer the train. Less faffing and less claustrophobic.
small not much ogling this week but off to the Outer Hebrides next week with a very dashing Commanding Officer who will be wearing his kilt at some stage! I do believe we might be in the same hotel.....

Slings

A fresh start and a clean slate in the morning x

Didn't win a penny at the bingo!

Blimey this bus is careering along at the moment, it’s brilliant but because of the amount of posts some babes may get missed along the way. Don’t get disheartened if you don’t get a response, keep posting x

Yes Spanna I do LOVE a list, I cannot deny it! In the spirit of adding to the pro’s for not drinking I offer

Avoiding the anxious drinkers dawn
Lower bpm
Having more faith in myself
Getting into a freshly laundered bed sober
Recalling the end of the film/book/conversation the next day
Being calmer inside and out

Love to all xx

Day 26 af

Reasons to be at for me:
Not having (and loosing) the dailey wine shop conversation with myself
Not waking up at 3 panicking about the end of the night. Feeling guilty and ashamed.
Not worrying about hands shaking
Not worrying of smelling of last night's wine
Christmas has been easier to afford
I don't have to plan running (and af days) I can run any day!
Generally I feel less anxious af
The sleep I get is a better quality
Obvious but no hangovers
Not worrying about impact my drinking has on my children

slings good for you on what you have achieved. We have all slipped. You can pick yourself up and get back.

Morning all!! Hope everyone is Ok!

Almost Af Yesterrday (ie just one pint at lunchtime but nothing else in the evening other than tea)

Got a kidney infection and still recovering from a cold so had awful night sweats but at least I don't stink of last night's wine!!!

Started reading "kick the drink easily" last night and really want to do this. Physically feeling rubbish and mentally quite low but don't want my kids being raised by an alcohol addict. Thanks for creating this thread. Am using it as a lifeline atm. Admitted to my mum that I think I have a problem(she's been worried for years) so that's a start!

Thanks babes, today is a new day, today I will not drink. I’ve just poured half a bottle of wine down the sink.
Onwards and upwards........

Well done slings - I almost cried the last time I did that!!! You can do this x

The not worrying about smelling of last nights wine is another huge one for me....

Also the planning of the running - I am training for a fairly big run and the weeks I have a drink all training goes out the window which really irritates me!!

Ive started to listen to a new podcast:
Mother recovering

Only heard the first one but I found it useful.

Slings well done for pouring wine down the sink, I'm impressed that you didn't drink the other half last night

Spanna, Chiara - moving posts from both of you, and know Ma is in a similar position with her DD. You are all wonderful mums dealing with your own stuff AND taking on your children's issues as all mothers do, and doing a brilliant support job, even if it feels hard at the time. Big hugs and to all.

(PS Spanna I paid less than half price for the Gazelles as friend has DH who gets staff discount on top of the Black Friday price. She made him order for everyone in the North of England that she's ever met. They must have an articulated lorry doing the delivery just to her house.)

Sweet - gorgeous dress. That is the sort of shape I go for when I do go crazy and wear dresses. How's the gym going? We can support each other if you like. I am heading off there now. WB banging around in kitchen - offered to make dinner then got in a mood about it. I am making it worse by going out at teatime - but also better as I'm not here . Pilates and yoga sounds lovely but I am such a stresshead I can't get on with either of them. Right now I am doing weightlifting and boxing. I will either miraculously become strong and svelte or I'll end up looking like a man. But at least I will be able to punch anyone who dares say so. Then run away in my Gazelles.

Loving all the reasons for being AF. I do love a list. I'll try to add mine presently and also to read back and reply to all your posts and properly get to know the newbies (welcome to you all!) I've been in London for a couple of days and the thread has sped along without me and don't have time to catch up right now.

Was at a work 'do' on Monday and although I didn't get drunk (unprofessional!) I did drink more than I intended to. I start slowly but then speed up as it gets into my bloodstream. Got to 10.30 and I just walked out before I had any more. So no disasters but it makes me even more stressed about all the Christmas socialising. I think because I have a self-imposed rule not to drink at home now (for very good reasons) that when I go out some self-sabotaging part of me wants to make up for it. Am seriously thinking of stopping for good in January. But then I say that every year (sigh)

Back after Body Pump - laters taters xxx

hope so impressed with all the gym work. I do fuck all. I stayed in the Qbic inLondon on Monday night. Love it.Well done to all thr small and big steps by new Babes and I agree with beaches. Dont feel left out if you are not name checked, its just so hard to remember everyone!

Bloody hell Ma I was booked in the Qbic on Monday but changed it last minute as found a hotel in walking distance of the party I had to go to (we were organising it). If I had known you were there I'd have said sod it, forked out for an Uber, left the party early and we could have met up!!!! Must co-ordinate our work trips better