30 days no contact - Thread no 2

[Mumanddadtoone]

As the last thread is almost full, thought I'd start a new one.

This is for all of us who are trying to do at least 30 days without contact with an ex.
So whatever your reasons for instigating no contact please feel free to join in and we can all support each other.

Iris65 huge hugs to you, i can't believe all that you're going through, rest up and hope that cold shifts soon.

So proud of all you girls. You're all doing well.

Today was starting over again so Day 1 NC for me, it's been an up and down day and there have been weak moments but overall i've felt strong. Going to workout now (can't be bothered but it makes me feel better) then head to bed.

Well done everyone xx

dinner I don't judge at all, i've made mistakes too. Big hugs to you and wow for being so secretive for so long, that must make it so much worse and more difficult without the support of friends. But you have us xx

Evening ladies. Need some hand holding - so upset this evening. Missing him like mad, thinking of all the good times we had together and how happy we were. Can’t understand why he just ended it so abruptly. I would never believe that he a liar or a game player. He ended it by text and I never got the closure - he refused to talk and explain things. This lack of closure is driving me absolutely mad! I think after he ended it, I just realised how much I loved him. I just can’t stop crying. I don’t think I will ever meet anybody who would be like him. I wonder if he thinks about me at all. All my friends said that he definitely had feelings for me and they were shocked when he ended the relationship - it was just not like him.

I just feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest. Please, tell me this pain will go. I have been through break ups before but this time it feels so different - probably because I love him so much.

Thanks dinner :) It’s been nearly a week NC now. I think about him every day and night. There were absolutely NO signs that this was going to end so suddenly. It was so out of his character. I still can’t believe it happened and I ve lost him.
I’ve read somewhere that love is addiction and when you break up with somebody you love, your brain produces something that is very similar to what drug addicts feel when they crave drugs.
I am going mad

liza sorry it's a bit late, I decided to just go out and have a nice time. Now the best one to listen to I feel while your heart is still fragile is this one, the one while you sleep.

And then you can move onto others just to build your self esteem and positivity up a bit.

I wish I would stop waking up at 4am! My mind goes into overdrive!

I just keep thinking- when all the initial hurt and sadness subsides and I feel like I’m finally getting somewhere- when would be the right time to starting talking to stbxh again?

He wants to be friends for dd’s sake. Can this happen?? Or will it just set me back when we do start talking again. They say you have to be emotionally detached- can this ever really happen with the father of your child?

Happy I am making myself remember the horrible stuff whenever I start thinking about the good stuff. If you haven't got that then you could try reciting 'This too shall pass' when you start thinking about the good things. Getting angry abou the way you were dumped and remembering it might help too.
Liza I had to stay in touch with my physically abusive husband because we had a son. A friend did all of the communication for me or you could try email/text. Fewer emotional triggers that way.
dinner' You're right, the pain does fade.
meow I find the gym helps too.
anxious the heart and the mind often disagree!

I am so fed up

dinnerdatediaster- Not good My crazy mind decided to message him yesterday telling him that I still love him and want to make things right. I woke up to no reply. He never ignores my messages so feel like I've pushed him too far this time. Feel like an utter mug. Well done for getting to Day 14. Am praying for the day I can say I am on that day which is seeming impossible at the moment x

Back here again. I was here at the beginning of the first thread. In a similar situation to @dinnerdatedisaster
It's just so hard, someone I've spoken to everyday of my life for 10 years. Started as friends ended up in a totally fucked up disfunctional relationship. Both unhappily desperately married for years. I seperated before any of this began. And I guess I thought I had loved him quietly for so many years and thought he felt the same.
So I've lost my closest friend and my life is a mess.
Day 2 for me.
I haven't managed to go for more than a few weeks without talking to him. But I desperately need to break this cycle. It's making me very unwell.
I am also so fucking angry that years and years of him telling me he was unhappy and that he loved me. (When we were friends) and now he just gets to carry on with his bloody life

dinnerdatediaster- I don't even think I want to be with him thats the annoying thing! I don't think he will change but I am finding it hard to adapt at the thought of us not together- although that wasn't even great. There is a whole playlist on spotify called single independent ladies- highly recommend!

Why did you call?! You were doing soooo well!x

dinnerdatedisaster- Oh babe! Mine just replied so I replied back. Day 1 tomorrow lol?