30 days no contact - Thread no 2

[Mumanddadtoone]

As the last thread is almost full, thought I'd start a new one.

This is for all of us who are trying to do at least 30 days without contact with an ex.
So whatever your reasons for instigating no contact please feel free to join in and we can all support each other.

geri there's a few to choose from so try these:

Dinner don't call him!!!
Why'd you want to?

dinner I get where you're coming from, I mean I miss telling him about mine and hearing what he's been up to but this is only out of habit because you've been used to it so it will feel out of the norm right now but it'll pass. Go have a nice relaxing evening and just pamper yourself and only think about you. And then look forward to seeing them tomorrow. Coming back off holiday is always a crap time but think how much you enjoyed it and perhaps look at where to go next.

Happy Halloween everyone!

dinner that's the part of NC I struggle with the most. The sharing of your life with that one person. Each day at least 1 or 100 things pop in my head that I would want to share with him. I'm finally starting to see there is no point now though. He doesn't care. But it sucks so much, because he used to act like he did and would message me so much.

But like someone else (Ami?) said it is just a habit, and after a while you get a new normal. I think though it is sometimes hard to talk about things as deeply with friends as you would with an ex. But feel free to share with us how your day was or whatever you want to talk about. I know it's not the same, but sometimes it just helps to chat about anything and everything.

itsjustmarley the hypnosis has helped me i think, i have thought about him today but it's been more distant than usual and whilst i feel upset about everything there is certainly some inner strength i have today that's making me feel less sad. going to listen again tonight.

Sorry people are struggling. It’s tough trying to get used to not having that certain person in your life anymore. And even tougher when you still have to see them because of dc and act like nothing has happened.

Ps itsjustmarley- which hypnosis do you recommend out of the ones you’ve put on here today? X

Me too. Do you ever wonder were they really intetested? All that intetest in my day and me and my kids was it all because they wanted sex/relationship/the chase but no longer care or didn't care in the beginning. Men seem to be able to just switch off. The last few days before mine disappwared he had begged me to come see him as had missed me so much. Then wham gone. Are they just more stubborn so don't want to show their hurt but are really going through it or just switch off next

I’m told that men just shut away their emotions so the don’t have to deal with them. Of course this means they never truly get over the end of the relationship until it all comes out months later, sometimes years.
So rest assured they’re likely feeling like shit but won’t show it.

They do block it out, act like women are crazy for being so upset. We’re the hysterical ones for having emotions and daring to express them. They tell people ‘it wasn’t that serious’, ‘it wasn’t working’, ‘I don’t know why she’s so upset’. Anything to make themselves look reasonable and rational.

In a few months when they realise the grass is not greener, that they are lonely, that they are stuck with someone who is not you, they realise what they’ve lost. Then they are the total losers because you have fabulously moved on. They will know you have, by seeing you or through friends or social media etc. Wait for that day when you can tell them to f right off

I can’t wait for that day Ami

Me too!

I would imagine my exbf is shocked that I haven’t tried to contact him as in the past I would have done.

We’ve had onoff times in the past when I would def. contact him

It’s now Day 24!!

Heart 24 days is amazing! Well done!! Day 35 here (had to think about that). All still good with me. Glass of wine, bake off and then early night. Just perfect 👌

Dinner that is different and I absolutely don’t condone that. I couldn’t ever be OW. BUT your feelings are just as valid as everyone else’s and this thread is for support in getting over someone, taking your life back and recovering. He’s obviously a nasty shit cheating on his wife and hurting both of you whilst he thinks he’s cock of the walk. Stay away from him. He’s not available anyway, he’s a lying cheating scumbag. And stay away from married men, that won’t ever end well.

Just wrote a post on the 'ridiculous things your ex said during divorce/separation' thread. It made me feel a lot better.

Anytime my mind wanders towards remembering the good times and the physical affection I recall some of the stuff from my (long list) of selfish, nasty and cruel things that he has done and said.

It has to be done. Its like a physical addiction. Friday is moving day.

Hope everyone is doing OK. I am too tired to read much of the thread as I was at my Dad's funeral (150 miles away) yesterday and also have a bad cold.

I can’t tell anyone that we have now split up and I’m feeling crap about it all.

That makes it really hard. I went through a similar thing when I was made redundant as they had a confidentiality clause because redundancies could damage the business reputation. It was awful facing people and not being able to tell them.

Iris65 hope you feel better soon and sorry about your dad

My ex said he wanted to stay in touch and when I said I didn't and have already blocked him he then said 'Oh, that's easy. I'll just use another phone number and email.'

WTF was I thinking when I told him? I have refused to tell him where I am going amd he said he needed to know to make sure I had somewhere to go! This from the tosser who gave me two days to leave the week that my Dad died!

Thanks Ami. On the drive home, my friend drove me there and back (300 mile round trip) I cried and sobbed so much over everything I thought I would never stop.

Iris, sorry to read about you losing your Dad. Can't believe your ex rushing you at such a sad time. Glad you had your friend with you for the funeral.

Dinner glad you realised how wrong it was. Must be so hard having to.keep quiet about your heartbreak. You are well rid of him though, cheating scum.

Even though I know I am well rid too it doesn't seem to help does it.