@silkpyjamasallday I'm sorry you had that experience. What nasty pieces of work those women must have been to socialize with you and act friendly and then do that.
Getting involved with someone else's spouse shows a tremendous lack of character. I think that part of the anger comes from knowing that someone acted with no regard to how their actions would effect you, pretended you weren't a person with feelings. It shows a tremendous lack of empathy. It's very dehumanizing.
We were in a situation where my DH's boss was having an affair openly at work, but we were still required to socialize with him and his wife. It was creepy to watch, and we kept all contact to a minimum to avoid being complicit in his lies. When his wife finally figured it out and left him, his colleagues were happy for her that she broke free of him.
@sofato5miles "I think one thing that is often forgotten in the slagging (see several posts of it following yours) is that how rarely people meet other people that they can fancy and fall in love."
Evidently the person you had this lovely experience with has already found someone else to fancy and fall in love with or they wouldn't be married. I think that if someone only falls for married people, they might want to look more closely at themselves as to why. It really isn't a sign of emotional health.
You already know what he will do when the going gets tough -- he'll find someone new to fancy and fall in love with. The new relationship and falling in love are so much more fun and exciting than figuring out how to stay in love while life is happening.