Things you don't miss about an Ex

[Wheelycote]

Recently become single and have been bereft. I read something on another thread and it reminded me of a behaviour ex had. Sulking.
It's strange how, things like that become the norm.

The rose tinted glasses are starting to fall. It won't happen overnight, we were together for 8 years.

Pls share something about an ex, that you don't miss.

His mother!

Loving this thread !!!

The blame game ( everything my fault or somebody else's )
Feet up on the sofa while he gave out orders
Being aggressive
Constantly the victim
Self obsessed
Interruption of conversation ( then it becoming about him)
No empathy
Jogging bottoms and polo shirts ( what was that all about)
Being his armchair therapist
What ever people had done he always had done better.
No help at all around the home
Always a drama
Accusations of affairs !!!! How I had the time !
Lack of money terrible spending habits.
Drinking and drug taking ( never ever drug taking whilst being out with me )
His lack of social skills
Road rage

Walking on egg shells

Life is better and calmer !!!!!

His laundry left everywhere and general messiness;

His bossiness;

His lack of help with childcare and housework;

His mother;

His inability to stick to a budget, and the huge debt I ended up with after we split up;

His inability to take no for an answer;

His lack of emotional intelligence.

Gaslighting, making me question my sanity.
Waking me up in the night, every night for years.
Demanding new this that and the other and haranguing until he got it.
Demands for ever more money so that the rest of us went without.
Demands for sex to reduce his angry testosterone levels, and badgering until he got.
Cooking a meal he liked only for him to say 'it tastes different this time, I don't like it'. Or telling me he'd gone off it, once I'd cooked it and dished it up.
Calling us names, belittling us.
Never ever cooking, cleaning or helping at all.
The list is endless and he's still living in a parallel universe in which he is the wronged party. Elsewhere, thank goodness!

YY to the lies and the gaslighting and the eggshells.

Also how everything was always turned onto me or other people and was never his fault - it was really amazing how angry he could be with others over things that were clearly and obviously his own fault.

Also the money, constantly bailing him out, him spending my money all the time.

His complete inability to be kind and supportive.

His lateness for everything.

Him always being tired or ill and expecting me to comfort him and look after him but his total abscence whenever I was ill.

Constant secrets...

Constant bullying of me and others.

One thing I do miss is his lovely mum who does not deserve a son like him

Being constantly woken up by him turning over in bed
Criticism
Debt
Passive aggression
Lies
Gluttony
Selfishness
His mother and her apron strings
Obsession with overuse of garlic (triggered a garlic allergy!)
Moaning
Whistling
Half finished jobs
Ironing his shirts

Talking over me.

Being utterly self-centred.

Being really as boring as fuck.

Telling me to 'sh' when I laughed out loud.

Saying 'sarrogate' instead of 'surrogate' and 'killed two birds IN one stone' - by the end I had to hide the knives over these.

Unbelievably shit sex.

Over-sensitivity to any perceived criticism.

Laziness.

'That'll do' attitude.

His fucking banjos.

Arguing the toss over every. Little. Thing.

Jealousy.

Silent treatment.

God, he was (is) a weapons-grade tosser.

Telling me I'm shit at my job. Telling me any advancement was too much for me just like my exh did.
Telling me I was just about coping when I met him. I was a lone parent of a 2 and 5 year old without even an overdraft let alone debt and no one had any concerns about my immaculate happy children.

Dragging me through a court case for him to see his daughter after he, just he fucked up and his ex withheld contact - sensible woman that she is.

Telling me unless I'm interacting with my children at all times then I'm a shit mum.

My bf had to talk me through that having a coffee whilst our 5 children who have been friends their whole lives played in the garden - in sight of us was normal and healthy.

Ex had a flea in his ear about play dates being just a social gathering for mums and were negligent!!!

I don't miss

*the boasting about everything. "Im the fastest in my job" "my best mates a DJ"
*Inability to see that he was embarrassing himself and people were cringing (at mostly his boasting)

• inability to see how shite he was at sex. Wham bam thank you mam. Horrendous at oral but thought he was gods gift.
• how he had to put our lives on Facebook! Every tiny detail! *when catching him out in a lie, him saying "I don't remember saying that before" *pretending to everyone he was a perfect dad and he did shite all - they weren't not my kids and I done everything!

***the fact he had to be the centre of attention at all times. Biggest attention seeeker going

Snoring
Nothing was ever his fault
Ignoring the children and me
Walking on eggshells

Cherry he sounds like a prize knob you are well rid!

I also need to add obsessive Facebook etc use. I'm shocking at wasting time on the net but when I'm alone ffs.

Shit phone etiquette.

Noisy eating for the misaphonia sufferers here

The noisy eating (had to leave the room if he was eating an apple)
The put downs that were done for my own good
But most of all the cheating

I don't miss feeling like I was never good enough for him

Anything about him. Dumping him was a great decision. DH is everything he wasn't. He rarely crosses my mind.

Queen he was believe me! That's only half.

He'd strip naked at barbecues, post pictures of his testicles on Facebook, he was a clown and a compulsive liar.

Everyone has seen through him now.

Oh god yes that reminds me...

Being surgically attached to his phone... I'd get dressed up to go out for a nice meal and would always be sat twiddling my thumbs being ignored in favour of his phone, chess, talking to OW (because I was 'boring' ), risk, reading news.... he'd order way too much food and I'd always pay for the privilege of being ignored.

Oh yes grumpy for my own good....how could I forget the character assassinations for my own good...

The walking on eggshells,
the explosive temper,
the horrific debt,
his key in the door,
the knowing every special occasion would get ruined ,
doing all his thinking for him.
the horrid grandad jeans he wore,
the childish sulks,
the screaming at me for not looking at him 'right'
the silent treatment
and the blank looks at every simple question 'do you want a cup of tea?' Him -
and his smell, you know how someones natural scent can make you want to leap on them and do stuff? - his became sour and acrid.

Always walking ahead of me when out.

Turning his back on me and walking away every time we had a conversation and I was speaking.

And everything else mentioned on this thread.

The blowing hot and cold

Selfishness

And everything being about him

Cherry they would've made for an interesting profile picture

Queen oh I'm with you there on the noisy eating!!!

Mumbod loving the 'weaponsgrade tosser'😂😂 love it