The Dating Thread Number 122: Colour By Numbers

[ConorMcGregorsChin]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

Been - he's lovely and a really good dad but my instincts and patience are telling me to bank this one for now

Do you ladies get asked a question by irons if you want anymore children? Before you meet? And what do you make of it if yes?
To me seems too personal question

More kids or marriage is too personal but....in some ways it's the guy when they answer letting you know what's available.

It put me right off. I'm 28 I don't know if I want more kids. I would get married again to the right person. I don't want to start a relationship with caveats like that already in place. I want to make those decisions together at the time.

Otoh the late 30's dating market is according to my exh quite heavy on women really wanting a first baby so if the guy is dead set on no more it's better to be honest especially if there are tangible reasons - the snip for example!!

what I have been asked about kidsby a few irons, I don't mind being asked because if they want kids it's a bit of a waste of time meeting, I don't plan on having anymore but then again maybe if I was in a good relationship I might change my mind. Marriage is a hard one to ask about because things can change a lot, I'm sure a lot of people that have just come out of one might say 'never again' but could easily change there mind in a few years when they are madly in love.

I don't mind being asked if I want more kids. If someone really wants them then I'd love to but they'd have to understand Time might be against us. If they don't want kids, well I have one so that could be awkward.

Marriage I have no desire to do it again but if someone swept me off my feet, never say never!

They are personal questions but fair ones I think given age & life desires.

Well the question was asked by someone that has a 4 year old child,recently separated(around 6 months) and knows I have 2.
Anyway I like him a lot,ticks a lot of boxes.
We did chat before but couple of weeks ago he gone distant,wasn't messaging every day but to be fair he said please bear with me for few days unti my sporting commitment end. I did bear few days still no contact from him so I texted him saying looks like he forgot about me so that's ok and good luck in future. He read but never replied. I deleted contact and basically forgot about him.Somehow last night remembered,went on WhatsApp to snoop. I had no contact saved but his incoming call from before still showing on the log. Anyway awkwardly unintentianally while looking at his "last been " pressed call button and tried to end straight away. I was mortified! Hoping he wouldn't see it.Anyway less then ten minutes after he called and we ended up talking for about 1,5 hrs. Still thinking about him today!

Hmmmm..

The iron is a banker so has more than a job .He's intelligent,educated,has a posh telephone manner,looks like looks after himself fitnesswise as has sporting hobbies,not bad looking at all.

What's - sounds good!

Love I love pizza - food for thought!

UPS picked up a parcel the other day. The guy was hot and dressed just the bloke in Legally Blonde. I think I need a job where I'm sending parcels by UPS. He has a job, a uniform, transport but no pizza...

Not ups it's not their own vehicle!

Haha. Love the idea of pizza delivery guy.
But.... I had to stop ordering from mine as he inappropriately texted me at 1am one morning. I'd never exchanged more than vague pleasantries (His English wasn't very good) I had never flirted with him or given any indication. He obviously had access to my phone number as part of the order process. I was quite shocked. I wanted to report him but didn't as there was no more from him after I replied telling him to back off.

On a happier note, I had my Christmas Waitrose shop delivered by a hot young surfer dude type. He was late so gave me free champagne. Double whammy!!

Whatis - I have to be honest if I got a passive aggressive message from someone saying that I must've forgotten them I'd ignore too. I think you either have to just suck it up & ignore/not get in touch yourself or straight up ask what's going on. Anything else looks like game playing or desperate & you never get a straight answer. Did you ask him why you hadn't heard from him?

Conor - please tell me you are not so organised at life that you're having a Christmas shop delivered now!

Conor wow! The cheek. I assume he must be successful sometimes like the POF Pests... how annoying to lose a good pizza place.

Haha. No Phoenix this was last Christmas!

Yeah Been pretty creepy.
My Dad always said that if I guy asks 20 girls in a nightclub for a blow job, one would say yes. Pretty grim. But he lived his youth in the 60s. Gave me a pretty healthy heads up from a young age as to what to occasionally expect from some blokes!

I have a date with Mr Mountain on Friday (lunch and a walk), excited but nervous. I've been in so many dates but it doesn't get any easier. I hate going for lunch because I get to nervous to eat. Anyway, he lives in a real house, has his own business, is single and when I looked him up on Facebook it turns out we have friends in common. He's a bit older than me but that doesn't bother me too much.

So I haven't heard anything from the irons who wanted to meet this week. In fact I'm going to stop calling them irons until there's an actual date in the diary.

But two new weekend matches have asked for specific dates so this week I will be seeing RugbyIron & Digital Iron on Fri & Sat.

Still not sure whether to keep the sitter for Thurs night or not? I would expect if he wanted to see me he would at least have messaged me over the weekend?

phoenix its bloody annoying when you arrange a sitter and then the iron disappears. My iron for today disappeared but I wouldn't have been able to go anyway due to a family emergency. Hopefully my Friday date will stay in touch, he seems quite keen and wants to book a table at a pub.

Phoenix
He said something along the lines of cold feet and apologised before I had a chance to say anything. It was funny he kept asking questions one after another and I got an impression he was desperate for me not to end the call .
Not sure if I was passive aggressive, it annoyed me I've not heard from him for days and in my experience it shows person simply not interested so I just let him know I'm not going to wait around for him. Pretty standard when you feel there is a potential but it's not my fault it didn't developed.

Hi everyone. Sorry for posting and vanishing. My god, been reading all these posts. What an eye opener... stalking on social media, it hadn't occured to me. So naive. I'm only on Guardian Soulmates as I suspected I see my ex on Tinder or POF shudder Also the issue of getting childcare and then being cancelled on at the last minute. That would wind me up!

Have supposedly got a first date tomorrow, becoming more like it will be a hook up but it's only a walk in the park until when/if I get the feels. Waiting to see is he cancels now... but there's been some fruity texting in the meantime

Such a comfort to have this thread. Hope you're all well x

I'm not sure I can do dating.

to cut a few long stories short, there are two really apparently very nice men who are making big / huge efforts to get to know me; and one very not nice man (Mr Sexting) who has blown their efforts out of the water by resurfacing and making them seem irrelevant.

Please tell me how to block him and stick to it. I know he is unhealthy.

I am such a badass about everything else but I am shit at this.

I think I shouldn't even be talking to nice people as it's so unfair when Mr S has me in such a mess while doing so little.

I had a therapist who said: if you could see what the hook is, how they get you on the hook, could you deal with it better? I know a lot about what the hook is, but it doesn't neutralise it at all