The Dating Thread Number 122: Colour By Numbers

[ConorMcGregorsChin]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

Hi Anti - didn't want to read & run. How has he made them irrelevant? That cuts straight to the quick so there's not as much there by comparison? Or is it that you believe that you don't deserve nice guys but do deserve his shit?

What platform are you on so we can help you block him? How have you let him back in?

Hang in there. This process is brutal at times but can be wonderful just moments later. (Says the woman who cried her eyes out over a ghost last week!)

Thanks Phoenix!

He's got my mob number so I need to block that on my phone - no technical difficulty - I mean I have to decide to stop desiring his messages.

He makes the others seem irrelevant because they are not exciting and he is.

There is something bad and twisted in there - in me - and I can't solve it over night. What I should do, is block him by massive will power and then try to solve the stuff over years ;)

Thanks

Anti How long have you done online dating? Im considered a veteran. I ve done it on and off since 2005! My last proper relationship was back then and since then its harder as anyone with a mobile can get on the net. Back then its was different.

People always come back. Some more worrying so. Ive had 3 women come back to "try again". I had moved on by then.

Whats wrong with 2 nice men trying to get to know you?

the niceness of other people relative to him is insane. I am such a twat. I had a minor car prang yesterday and told 3 dating irons about it, and a few people in real life. The responses range from one woman practically insisting that her husband fix it (a real life person) - to loads of sympathy from some other real life people - to sympathy from two nice irons (I cancelled a date with one, he was lovely about it, asked if everything was ok and suggested meeting near me so we didn't need the car!) - and this guy - the nasty guy! - just wants to ask me questions about how it was all my fault. (it was, but he wants to know what happened in aggressive detail.) He did say first "are you ok?" but that is pretty weak in the grand scheme of things.

So why is the nasty one the one I want?

Not ok. I shouldn't really be doing this.

That be Mr Sexting? If it is then block his ass. Some people are drawn into strong personnalities. If it doesnt feel right. Walk away now.

AntiG it feels hard now as you're drawn to Mr Sexting, but you can walk away.

I really wanted Mr Electric, but after talking about problems on here I had advice that if he was prioritising drink over me in early dating he always would. That was right and I'm glad I walked away. I'm seeing Mr PrevIron who for now is putting effort in watch this space .

Others on here will have done likewise. Follow what your head says and block Mr Sexting.

People often come back,not always.
The one I was waiting for to come back never did.Plenty of others tried though,varying from brief dates to exh

Grinch - I'm a bit like you. I have a MrSexting who doesn't treat me as nicely as the other two lovely people I'm talking to. MrS likes to wind me up and I fall for it every single time! But there's something about it. I know it's to do with my own self values. The problem is MrS is getting a bit nicer to me and now I'm getting bored!

Iv got sexting radar on. The minute someone iv not met and not been officially dating tries to sext ,gets blocked. Its huge turn off for me, red flags make me run for the hills . Block delete ignore.

Hi I just wanted to pop in for some advice. I was thinking about signing upto match.com it looks like the cheapest option is £9.99 for 6 months so it's gonna cost £60 in total is that correct? Isn't there a way to get it cheaper?

Agree about sexting before you've met. Yurrrrrck! What if you meet and fight fancy them!!! Urgh.

I've had a look at mr politician on Facebook (work account) and decided not to meet him. Too many loon flags!

I have no irons! Work very stressful just now so think I will wait a week until I crank up the apps again.

Anti - think of it this way - you want a relationship because it's fun and nice and all good things - not because it's essential. Therefore not at any cost. It's kind of like I want to buy a house next year but if it comes down to it seriously compromising my life style I won't do it - I don't want a house or a boyfriend at any cost!!

strartingtotry Yes, there is a cheaper option. I'm at work at the moment but you make the purchase you can buy one month for £30 I believe of there is a three month offer.

Match is great if you live in a city but its limited for the amount of people on there if you live in a remote area.

Ive been and off match so much Ive got shares in the place.

Queenofthedrivensnow What is a loon flag? You mention his name as Mr Politician. Is he in the Monster ravin Loony party?

Is he in the Monster ravin Loony party

Not monster raving looney I might be more keen for that - just few amber flags that make him not my cup of tea - dont want to slag him off he's ever so nice but just not my bag!

When I was a OLD beginner I used to sext quite a lot, I worked out quickly that it wasn't a fpgood idea before meeting someone, quite often they are nothing like you imagined them to be, some look nothing like their photos or are just complete twats when you speak to them I RL. I also think it's a bit sleezie and creepie. Even if I just want a hook up I need to meet someone first before I decide if they are fuckable.

If anyone tries to sext me now I just stop talking to them (slowly fade away), it ruins the whole first date thing, same with naked photos, it ruins things, I like to save it until I undress them as it's part of the fun.

I haven't really been on POF for a couple days, just talking to Mr Mountain and arranging our first date, I can't be bothered to look for other irons at the moment as I'm too bust too speak to other people and I can't find anyone that looks normal .

Yes Smeaton, sometimes it's worse then just sexual texts, I have had several videos sent to me of a grafic nature.

Yes lovemusic33 I made the mistake of getting involved in sexting before meeting as well when I was new to OLD, and stupidly went along with it. Really toe-curlingly awkward when you meet and don't fancy them at all.

And there are some who are just picture collectors and totally flake out when it comes to meeting.

Grinch you need to figure out what you want. If it's feeling as sexy as fuck and having hot sex then go for Mr Sexting in the full knowledge that that's all it is and keep control of yourself and your oxytocin. If you want a relationship then kick him into touch. I think we all go through the 'I can handle this' phase but it's not easy.

I'm very anti sexting now. I used to do it but now I just don't go there. That said I have done some via the hook-up site's messaging app if I'm really up for it but I don't want it randomly appearing on my phone!

I don't want to ride the lurching roller coaster of hope then disappointment and as I want a proper relationship I'm going back to old-fashioned and keeping it low key until we meet. First date with Mr Spires tomorrow. It's been billed as a quick coffee or drink after work that will lead to lovely long dates doing amazing things together if we click (his words). So I'm seeing this as first date minus one! We are on one or two alternating funny and informative texts a day. It's all very grown up! My interest is piqued but I'm avoiding gushing over-sharing, there's no over investing and absolutely nothing sexy. I've never been so under-invested for a first date - deliberately so! Let's face it the chances of him even looking like his pics are slim...

In other POF news there's none. I'm not actively looking and the ones that have sent a message have ONS written all over them.

Oh god Love don't remind of trophy ending videos. Why? Just why? I mean how mechanical can you get? Grabbing your phone to film that. hope he anti-bac wiped his phone afterwards. Probably not.

Beenthere anti vac wiping their phones bleugh.....reminds me I must take baby wipes into work for the general filth on the desks. Urgh

Been I think I have had 4 or 5 wank videos, followed by a message asking me if I liked the video. It's quite funny that a complete strange thinks a woman will find a video of them playing with themselves a turn on . Probably the only time a man can multi task though. Someone sent me a video the other day and they actually said another woman's name, I couldn't stop laughing, I messaged him back asking if Dawn liked the video.

Strarting if you create your profile on Match and then hang around for a month or so without paying then the price comes down . I've tried loads of paying sites but always come back to POF. POF is free and I'm quite content on there but I seem to have a higher tolerance for twat-sifting than most!