The Dating Thread Number 122: Colour By Numbers

[ConorMcGregorsChin]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

No date for me this weekend.

Mr Lost has suddenly decided to message me ( been quite for ages ) saying that he wants to see me and that he 'wants me' , he wants me to meet up with him next weekend.

Mr Mountain seems very keen, planing future dates, places where he would like to take me. I'm playing it very cool and just waiting to see how our 2nd date goes.

Mr Lost passes the 'kitchen work too test' but he doesn't pass the 'long term relationship test', I'm only talking to him in case things don't work out with Mr Mountain and I need a FWB shag .

There's also talk about Mr RL ( family friend ) moving closer and being very interested ( he's also kitchen work top passable but not long term relationship).

Really hoping Mr Mountain turns out to be relationship material. Then again this time next week I will probably end up with no irons.

Ah feck. Dd2 best friend from school dad has popped up on tinder - nothing weird I know he's single. Does that mean he right swiped me? Awks.....

Queen I would have to swipe right just to see

Love - I caaaant!!!

Plus dd2 little friend is in his photos

But are you not curious to see if he swiped right? I usually find the first few people that come up on Tinder (when I log on) have swiped right.

Fine but I'm unmatching him straight away!

No match so far thank fuck

I'm getting bored of one of my irons. MrCar seems lovely but there's no decent chat, he just wants chit chat sort of conversations whereas I enjoy having a proper good natter about topics. Getting a bit fed up of the 'hey how are you, what are you up to?' questions. We're due to meet on Tuesday but I'm having doubts about it already.

I seem to have another iron, I'll call him MrTeacher. He's suggested a drink next week, I said that was fine and he's gone quiet on me so not sure if he's an iron or not at the moment. I am hoping he replies.

Few maybe he hasn't spotted you on there yet or he swiped left.

I had a old school friend click on 'meet me' on POF, feels a bit awkward as I have known him since I was 5 and there's no way I would want to date him.

I've traded dates for bad movies & now yoga lol. Can't drink right now or I would be drowning my sorrows!

A guy who stopped me on the street and asked for my Instagram (crying with laughter) keeps messaging to get me to meet up. I'm not on social media much right now so keep missing them. Why does it feel weirder that we met in real life than online?

The dick pics are in full swing tonight....always good for a laugh....interviewing au pairs tomorrow to get some help in the evenings....then I can start making some plans to date....do you find that men find women with kids off-putting? I've made it clear I have kids in my profiles and wonder if it goes against you?....their loss if it does though I guess....

Still no march im safe :-)
Had a potential iron but think I've killed the conversation.

Just had a text exchange with my bloke mate - he's just rejected a tinder iron on date one for gluten intolerance!

Need having kids definitely affects how they see you.And especially long term relationship prospects.I have been told before that the only reason why they don't pursue serious relationship with me it's because I have children .Not one person but a few said so.

Dipping toe in, have lurked on and off this thread and may use some advice for an OLD novice.

Signed up to POF last week then got overwhelmed and hid my profile. Such a whimp. Logged in again tonight and unhid. Deep breath.

How many potential matches do you get, roughly, on tinder gold per day? Does anyone know?

Been busy cooking up a storm tonight for a partaay tomorrow. No sorrow drowning and no impromptu dates.

Ooh Smeaton that sounds good. I'm a convert to under-investing. Maybe you'll be the poster boy for this thread!

Eating did you go to lunch with Mr 3rd Person?

Love you're on a roll. So with Mr Lost had you DTD? I thought he'd pratted you around 'being ill' and 'getting up late'? Or am I muddling irons again? . With Mr Mountain don't let him whoosh you into a future that he's mapped for you on the back of a couple of hours. I'm still liking the idea of not committing further into the future than the time you've been dating. So why isn't Mr RL relationship material?

Wotcher oooh. Mr Tatt sounds all systems go. I do love crazy chemistry but I'm playing the long game for now.

So Conor are you even in a position to take up your Surfer's offer of a plane ticket? Or does he know it's impossible for you to drop knickers everything and run so it's a non-gesture really ?

Need 43's a great age. The 30 something's are in your sights as well as the silver foxes. You're in commuting distance - London's your oyster! If you're a City girl get up to Madisons to see how it shouldn't be done! Dear Lord there are some sights there.

What so do I sense a miracle cure before Monday after taking the waters somewhere like Bath or Malvern?!

Myuser I can't be doing with that sort of 'chat'. Even my FWBs have had to be capable of a good natter about all sorts.

So Phoenix have I got this right? A guy stopped you in the street and asked for your instagram? Are you a sleb then or seriously drop dead gawjus? Not that they're mutually exclusive!

Dalphidol welcome! I hear you. I play hide and seek a lot with my profile depending on mood, resilience, how busy my life is etc. Sometimes you have to grin and bear it just to develop a thick skin.

what I thinks that's really sad that men feel that way because on the balance of probabilities a woman will probably have children....i don't know why it's such an issue though....I certainly don't see it as an issue....in fact I might even prefer it....perhaps it's because they see us as sex objects. Who knows'

Date update - I did have lunch with the third person and it can only be described as pleasant. He was very nice, the chat was easy, interesting and appropriate. There really was nothing wrong with him other than no physical attraction or spark. He has asked to see me again and at the moment it's looking like next Saturday.

My issue is date 2. He is currently away. I've only met him twice but on both occasions I has that nervous excitement in the pit of my tummy. I wanted him to touch and kiss me. But the conversation was not as good or easy as date 3.

I know in reality date 3 is the nicer person so why am I drawn to date 2.

Been I have no clue whatsoever why he stopped me! I was actually en route to the date with the guy who I thought was a great iron but disappeared, so I was well groomed, but I'm def not gorgeous. I mean he is -at least 20- 10 years younger than me (which I think is why I find it hilarious that he asked me for my Instagram). It used to happen to me a fair bit when I was younger -but not since having kids and gaining loads of weight-. I think it's because I have a striking feature -and big boobs- so I sometimes look different to other in the room? Or maybe he's really into milfs!

Eating The third person sounds like just a friend and definitely like he wouldn't pass the kitchen counter test. After you described your date I was surprised you said you're going on a second. And who wants "nice" - screw nice, I want butterflies AND banter AND charm. I'd give them both a second date if you're unsure and then I think you'll know which one (if either) is for you!

Need Yeah I think having kids makes a difference - but in a few ways. There are people who don't want your "baggage" as one guy called my DD but there are also some, depending on your age obvs, who want kids still and know you are capable and a parent already. Or there are some people (my DD's stepmum is like this) and can't have kids - meeting my ExH was great for her. (Now to the point that she spends more time with DD than he does as he keeps taking weekend work !)

User My understanding of TinderGold is that you get to see who has liked you as opposed to more potential likes every day. You also get boosts to make yourself more seen, more superlikes and a rewind option if you swiped left by accident. Not sure it's worth paying £7.49/month for when really you only get a handful of extras.

Looking forward to -walks of shame- date reports rolling in this morning!

Two dates this week, Thursday was Mr Painter, lovely guy, great banter but he was shorter than he'd said so was only the same height as me. Ended up DTD, messaged a bit the following day but my heart wasn't in it so not messaged since and he's not messaged me either. Date last night with Mr Truck, been messaging him on and off for about three weeks. Didn't look at all like his photo, told me he had four children, this went to five then six and the youngest was only months old. Date lasted two hours and I was home. Feeling a bit down about it all at the moment, sick of getting ready and going out to meet another person who doesn't live up to what I imagine x

Been I haven't DTD with Mr Lost, he had messed me around by not getting up early enough to meet up, he lives quite far away, I do really like him he's very good looking and shagable ,up until now he has been a gent when messaging me, was well behaved when we met but now suddenly he's started messaging saying 'I want you'. I would like to DTD with him but there's no way it would be anything more than that as the distance is a deal breaker for me. Mr RL is almost family (we he is family but not blood related, he's a relative of my step dads) so would be a bit awkward, he's just split with his wife and he has a history of being a bit of a player, he's not really my type but is totally shagable, I think I need to keep away from him as it could make things a bit awkward at future family events.

flower I don't understand why people lie

Flower I have no idea why people lie. It's such a turn off.

Date number 2 returns from holiday Wednesday. He as text regularly while away, so will be very surprised if we don't meet up. Texts are funny, lots of banter but also discuss various topics, so initial signs are good.

It's been years since I was in a relationship or DTD. So I'm thinking date number 2 might be a good place to start. For the first time in years I'm finding myself thinking about sex, so that is a good sign I think. I'm just so bloody nervous!