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Original poster

Hotel booking on DP's online banking

402 replies

Emboo19 · 30/08/2017 08:12

Just been onto the online banking to transfer some money from DP's account to our joint one (he knows I'm doing this). He's the one who signed up to the online banking but he gave me log in details and I can see the joint account and his own account, my own account is with a different bank. (Sorry going on a bit, just want to explain how I've seen what I've see).

Anyway, usually he just transfers any money I need from his mobile, but he's busy and said for me to log on and do it, I'm going holiday shopping today and needed some extra. Then this part I'm not proud of.....it's my birthday soon and I had a sneaky look at his recent transactions, to try see what he's bought me (I know that's really, really bad!)
I noticed last week there's a payment to a hotel, which is the same hotel he's staying in at the moment, he's working away. His hotel is paid for by his work, but they share so two men to a room. The charge is the same as a double room for one night at that hotel.

Is there any possible explanation (other than the obvious) that he'd have for booking his own room for a night? I really can't think of one right now, but then I'm struggling to think of anything other than killing him right now!
And how do I speak to him about it? Wait until he's home Friday or ask over the phone?

OP posts:
Original poster
Emboo19 · 30/08/2017 09:28

Money not month!!

OP posts:
Onecutefox · 30/08/2017 09:32

Is your DH going to stay in that room or already stayed? You could call the hotel and ask.

deste · 30/08/2017 09:36

Just say to him that when you went on to transfer money from the account that you noticed they had charged him for a hotel room. Did he realise they had done that.

user1494187262 · 30/08/2017 09:38

Like you, I would be worried OP

Particularly as you've said this goes on with his colleagues.

BackieJerkhart · 30/08/2017 09:41

ask to speak to his room mate (if you know him well enough) - I'm sure you can think of an excuse as to why you want to chat to him.

Grin what planet are you on??

OP can you access his emails? Sometimes hotels send an email confirmation of bookings.

ikeadyounot · 30/08/2017 09:49

I honestly can't think of anyway around this except asking him straight.

Unless you're willing to watch and wait and see if it happens again - how often does he travel away?

GeorgiePeachie · 30/08/2017 09:51

Maybe someone ELSE of the ten men wants to get laid...

Original poster
Emboo19 · 30/08/2017 09:51

I don't know Onecutefox it was last week the payment went through on the Tuesday evening. Would it come out on the same day/time? They arrive on Monday night to the hotel.

I don't know why, but I just get a feeling it's dodgy on his part. But nothing's been different and I've always trusted him.

Not actually sure BackieJerkhart I'm just heading out, but I'll try when I'm home.

OP posts:
Original poster
Emboo19 · 30/08/2017 09:53

Why would he pay though GeorgiePeachie?

OP posts:
hellsbellsmelons · 30/08/2017 09:54

Although there could be a perfectly simple explanation.
I think you know something is amiss here.
Do some more digging.
I would assume if the room is booked and paid for by him then a meal would be as well?
Although, if a bloke had paid for my hotel I would insist on buying dinner.

BannedFromNarnia · 30/08/2017 09:54

Is it possible that he did swap rooms due to needing space on his own - snoring, whatever - and is embarrassed to tell you because he ties up his personality with being 'good with money' and would see this as a failure?

Personally I would be a bit suss at this and would want an explanation - wait till you see him in person and ask so you can see his face. I don't think you're BU to have concerns about this.

SparklingRaspberry · 30/08/2017 10:32

If he had swapped rooms for ANY reason I'm sure he would've told you OP. So personally I think him buying his own room because of snoring is clutching at straws, sorry.

I don't get people who are like "just ask him???!!!" errrmm you do realise some people are good liars, right?! If he IS up to no good, then he's gunna cover his back once the OP questions this transaction

Personally OP I'd wait and not say anything. Have a look at his phone once he's back, or just ask him out right once he's home face to face if you feel you'd be able to know whether he's lying or not.

velocitygir1 · 30/08/2017 10:42

Maybe someone else he works with is having an affair and he paid the room so his wife wouldn't see?

Maybe someone else wanted to move rooms and didn't have the money to do so, so your husband lent him the money.

Maybe the company messed up everyone's rooms and they all had to pay their own? And the person he was sharing with paid his half to your husband in cash?

The list and scenarios are endless. Just ask him.

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 30/08/2017 11:06

fledging she said she wasn't proud because she snooped trying to see if she could spot what he has purchased for her birthday.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 30/08/2017 11:11

OP, TBH the fact that you have immediately reached this conclusion means that you don't trust your DH. And that is problematic.

PaganGoddessBrigid · 30/08/2017 11:17

If he was sleeping with somebody surely she'd just have gone in to the room booked through his work.

I think it sounds like he handed over the wrong card, or the work card was rejected, or work omitted to book the room.

mirialis · 30/08/2017 11:22

you don't trust your DH. And that is problematic.

I don't think so - she knows her DH well enough to know this is the kind of thing he would normally have mentioned to her. She knows what his colleagues get up to (and if you have worked in a hotel you know that she's right about that). I think it's fair enough for her to be suspicious without it meaning their relationship is problematic. It could well be innocent and he's not given her cause for concern before; if so, no harm done in questioning him face to face about the hotel charge.

Mumek · 30/08/2017 11:29

Surely, if DH was cheating - he wouldn't be stupid enough to book a room in the same hotel as his work colleagues.
Just ask him (face to face) you'll know what the truth is from his reaction.

Nakedavenger74 · 30/08/2017 11:32

Almost certainly a deposit. My company pays the hotel bills ahead of my arrival but what that means is the hotel has nothing to charge to if you run riot with the mini bar then do a dawn flit.

It's only when co has paid (as in your DP's case) that they do this. When I get there they charge my card a fairly big whack depending on the number of nights I'm staying to cover incidentals; restaurant, bar, room service etc. It shows up as a charge then once I've checked out it sometimes disappears like it never happened or it shows a credit and then a debit.

Trollspoopglitter · 30/08/2017 11:38

I missed how you know it's a room charge?

If it's just a hotel charge, my first assumption would be to cover the extra expenses of his stay - anything from
a tab at hotel bar, room service, Lauder, could be dinner for 2 or 5 (depending on their prices) and he's going to claim it back on expenses. Maybe he pays in cash other times and that's why it's not on previous months.

And if this isn't a repeat charge with a repeat refund, then it is NOT a deposit, as others keep suggesting.

BackieJerkhart · 30/08/2017 11:39

Surely, if DH was cheating - he wouldn't be stupid enough to book a room in the same hotel as his work colleagues.

This is naive. Many of the colleagues won't care. It may be commonplace in their business.

If he was sleeping with somebody surely she'd just have gone in to the room booked through his work.

He shares a room with his friend who is about to get married. His friend may not have wanted to share a room with his mate while he fucked some random woman. I wouldn't.

BackieJerkhart · 30/08/2017 11:41

^If it's just a hotel charge, my first assumption would be to cover the extra expenses of his stay - anything from
a tab at hotel bar, room service, Lauder, could be dinner for 2 or 5 (depending on their prices) and he's going to claim it back on expenses. Maybe he pays in cash other times and that's why it's not on previous months.^

Op said

The charge is the same as a double room for one night at that hotel.

How likely is it that his laundry, bar tab etc would add up to the exact amount of a double room at the hotel?

splatattack · 30/08/2017 11:48

I know that you trust him but your intuition is telling you something for a reason. Try and find out more...his phone, email etc. Trust your instinct because more often than not it is right...

timeisnotaline · 30/08/2017 11:58

Given the long standing working pattern and previous discussions on rooms sharing it is pretty odd. That said it could be a hotel stuff up (unless they wouldn't usually even have his card- eg I'd use my work crefit card so no chance a charge could turn up on my personal one)

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 30/08/2017 12:15

splat that's a sure fire way for an argument to start if she's caught.
She went snooping to see if she could a transaction for her birthday gift. Finds a hotel booking, which could very well be innocent.
And you're telling her to check his phone and email.

I know if my DH had done the above I would be fuming.