#3 He IS having an affair

[worldupsidedown]

Ok, here we go for round #3 in which we know DH is having an affair, and does not give a flying fuckof 25 years inc 19 years of marriage or respect for his LW and DD and now we try to establish what the hell thinks he's going to do next and hopefully learn about the YOWHLTF while trying to keep a calm and dignified posture

If he messaged to say he would be late, then I think 'let's leave it then' would be the best response. But whatever you decided, thinking of you.

🤔

Stay super strong. Don't have a wobble. Be stern. Mean what you say. Allow time to digest what he says. Keep eye contact. Wait before replying. It messes with their heads!

Although by now, you'll be having that discussion.

The threads are so long but I am not sure whether it is has been asked or if you have made it clear one way or another, but do you WANT to rebuild the relationship with him? Apologies if this has been made clear.

kittybiscuits that 'could' be playing into his hands. Esepcially if he didn't want to face up to her and simply offered because his MIL told him to talk to OP before talking to his parents; as OP had said it would be nice for him to talk to her before MIL.

You really need to leave dd out of this, she's your daughter not your confident.

Oh god that bloody awful shirt just came up on my Amazon feed. It really is ghastly! Serves me right for looking at it on the link

I have read from the beginning and I can say that you are without doubt a strong woman who will be the best of role models for your dd because you are not afraid to stand up for yourself, and you show that to wobble is human and does not make you weak. You DO have this world he has well and truly fucked his life... no matter what front he tries to get you to believe. Look after yourself and your dd. Good luck

Please try not to have a wobble in front of DD.
Go to the bathroom and close the door, scream in the garden- anything. Your dd world must be collapsing right now, everything she has known her whole life is never going to be the same.

By the way I think you're amazing- but please do not sit and wait for this arsehole. Give him till 10pm and then go to bed. I know you must talk, but let him see you're not going to wait for it to be on his terms, whether the trains are delayed or not.
Best wishes 💗

All those condoms strongly suggest it wasn't a one-off and wasn't unplanned. Sorry OP but you need to be realistic, he wouldn't be completely fine with ending the marriage (as your description would so far suggest he is) if it was just one or two events.

I think he's very arrogant and it's time he realised that the world doesn't dance to his tune.

Bloody milking it isn't he? You'd think he'd be rushing home!!!

Good luck 🙌🏼

world you are doing so well keeping everything together your a

Thinking of you Op, be strong you're doing so well.do not let him railroad you tonight or lead the conversation in any way-tell him how it's going to be and make sure he knows it's YOUR way now

WORLD massive hugs to you and DD. You so do not deserve this x your mind must be on overtime x what a tosser and selfish twit he is being so self serving x however please please look after you and DD X I really do think YOW is giving him shit she is running !! X hugs x

.

User the same thing happened to me! My husband was like, why are you looking at such an ugly shirt. It better not be for me! I said don't worry, you're not going through a midlife crisis and you're not stupid enough to wear such an ugly shirt. He said, is this man trying to reclaim his lad years? I said, looks like it. His response: What a utter twat.

You are really cool, OP.

I'm infuriated that he's even late! How dare he? What is he thinking?

world be as still and quiet as you can be. Do Not argue, do not agree or concur. Make notes - like you would in any other business meeting.

Do you think he's bottled about coming home to have this talk?

I really hope it is going ok!

I think it just shows his absolute total lack of any respect to not make a fucking effort to get home at a reasonable time for something so serious as his marriage ending.

A day off, half a day even for gods sake.

Chin up op

Hope all going as well as it can be. You can do this

You are doing great. I am glad you have had lots of good advice on here.

Hope it all went well and you stuck to your guns. You must be emotionally drained so be gentle with yourself - a drink and then bed. Tomorrow is another glorious day on your new road.