Serial Leaver - Left Again. What Do I Do???

[Quootiepie]

My (D)H has left AGAIN. Woke up this morning to find no sign of him and bankcard infront of PC. Wasn't until I went downstairs later on I saw he had posted his key through the letterbox. He left on Monday (I think) until Wednesday night, when I went in the middle of the night to beg for him back at his mums. He had just dumped shopping inside the door, and zoomed off again, me running barefoot in dressing gown trying to chase his car . Previous to that, about 2 weeks ago he left, and just dumped milk for DS through the catflap as he had left him with nothing, although by the time someone had to come and bring me milk. He promises over and over again he wont do it anymore, last night we were totally fine and yet this morning he left. I am not independant at all, and this constant kicking me back down is just too much. What on earth can I do? I dont know even what I mean by that. THe crisis team are coming sometime this evening, and I have thought about getting DS put into care because I really cannot cope another night jumping at every noise, checking the hall for notes or supplies, and just general whatsthefuckingpoint-ness. I do still love him, when he is OK he really is totally fine, realises his mistakes, but... I cant cope with this. I really cant.

SHe never asked if I was ok or anything when she rung, I can almost see her grin now thinking she might get DS as IF I would let him go near her without me. Which is what she suggested - him by himself to her

will call at 10.15 if they havent

QP - SS won't take your DS because they have his best interests at heart. They know that the place that he is loved and cared for and safest is with his mummy!

You might be having a little blip right now - but your DS's happiness is ultimately about the long term, not about whether for a few hours or days he is left to amuse himself for a while!

Just by being there for him you are being the best mummy he needs

QP

Make the call now re the Mother and Baby Unit.

errr, ok. Losing all my confidence though now, dunno if its because the first rush of panic has gone

well, think about how you will feel if DS goes to MIL, that should spur you on

where do you live q?

You will get through this depression - you may not believe this but you will someday come out of this dark valley you are currently in. And you will still be holding your son's hand when you do so.

berkshire

that was random, just got told they would call back in morning, mentioned mum and baby unit and he said something about he thinks it's book in advance, then basically said "ok, bye"

well, call back and say you want to book in

I did ask, he just diverted it abit.

you need a straight answer
a

and what is happening tonight?

nothing is. They are just calling tomorrow.

why dont you try and get some sleep

i dont want to all alone I know I will cry and wake DS< or have panic attacks and that. I cannot face the lonelyness

QP are you near reading at all?

Bracknell

yes - she's near Reading

take him into bed with you

you have to sleep at some point

even when my mum died i still slept for some time, even tho it was the worst thing to ever happen to me

you have a resonsibility to your son

go sleep with him if it helps you nod off

QP I can get to reading next week if you want a coffee.

QP - I've got the number for crisis team if you want to call them back

he wont stay in the bed, he rolls over and crawls off

I am scared to call them now, lost all confidence

CALL THEM , GET AN ANSWER, GO TO SLEEP ! oops