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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

From Russia With Love (earrings 2)

449 replies

MarilynMonsoon · 25/06/2017 23:54

Can't believe so many of you helped me that I need a new thread!?

No contact tonight, dread tomorrow's return to the flat though

OP posts:
efc1878 · 29/06/2017 19:38

kevinbacon that's brilliant

PoorYorick · 29/06/2017 19:54

In addition to Kevin's point, the Russians have a saying: "When you argue with a madman, onlookers may not be able to tell who the mad one is."

Dontaskmegoogleit · 29/06/2017 20:44

Hi Marilyn
I agree with all that said radio silence. You have so far shown so much dignity strength and humour.
Do let this pull you down.

Take care x

Dontaskmegoogleit · 29/06/2017 20:44

Don't !!!! Not do

Doublemint · 30/06/2017 08:04

Radio silence all the way! Don't get into a fab slagging match.

Concentrate on your new flat and spending time with good friends x

Doublemint · 30/06/2017 08:05

Fb not fab ffs!

Giraffey1 · 30/06/2017 14:25

He is simply showing by his actions (FB and otherwise) what a total idiot he is. Just ignore him, and concentrate on getting set up up in your nice new flat!

Original poster
MarilynMonsoon · 30/06/2017 17:39

I have the flat!! I can move in in two weeks, so happy it's a huge weight off. I crashed really hard over the last two days and just spent them crying in the loo at work mostly, I have asked people not to tell me the fb details but most people know he had an affair and that's why I chucked him, I don't think many people are fooled.

OP posts:
SchnitzelVonKrumm · 30/06/2017 17:41

Yay! Here's to your happy future Marilyn Wine

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 30/06/2017 17:43

Am really pleased for you. I won't lie, this is still going to be hard and you will be up and down. But in the future, I hope you will see it as the luckiest escape and a chance to find real happiness.
I've been through something similar - if you ever want a friendly ear, feel free to PM and.

Kevinbaconsrealwife · 30/06/2017 17:48

Fantastic news about your new flat sweetheart....of course you've crashed and you,ll probably crash some more...but every day that passes and every tear that's shed is healing.....better out than in!!! Take care and wishing you a peaceful weekend x

GeekyWombat · 30/06/2017 17:49

Oh Marilyn so glad to hear your update and that you have good news on the flat front.

I was worried when you went quiet that reality had set in and the adrenaline had worn off leaving you a bit broken. Be gentle to yourself and take some time this weekend to do whatever it takes to help regain your equilibrium.

Flowers for you. Slow and steady wins the race and this is going to get better and easier.

Your life will get easier, and he will still be a dick. ;)

picketfences · 30/06/2017 17:54

Aww! Totally understandable reaction, it's been such a tough week for you. So glad you got the flat, thats a positive step.

meladeso · 30/06/2017 18:03

not commented yet but have been following - you poor love, you poor brilliant love though. what a star you are.

what an unspeakable twat your exDP is.

i agree with all PP that you must not engage in any social media BS, however, i do think calmly letting anyone who asks know why you binned him, is absolutely the right thing to do.

as you say, most people seem to know he cheated now, and that's a good thing IMO. don't keep it to yourself.

Dontaskmegoogleit · 30/06/2017 19:10

All the very best wishes in your new flat. .. Here's some flowers Flowers
And as much as we all should not wish our lives away. Roll on 2 weeks. Take care

MrsMozart · 30/06/2017 19:13

Good update lass.

ohfourfoxache · 30/06/2017 19:22

Oh that's wonderful news! Well done, I'm so pleased for you.

Crashing is to be expected, you've had a hell of a shock. But you're going to get through it, I promise

Gemini69 · 30/06/2017 19:32

Congratulations.... this is wonderful news xx

mydietstartsmonday · 30/06/2017 19:32

Wow, have been reading since the beginning. Well done you, good luck in the new flat. Hope you meet someone younger and fitter then him and have hot hot sex. The best revenge is too be happy.

mydietstartsmonday · 30/06/2017 19:33

*than him

sodabreadjam · 30/06/2017 20:25

You deserve a lovely new life without him. Spend the next two weeks planning what you want to do with your new flat and put your stamp on it. Rediscover everything you used to enjoy in terms of food, music, TV programmes, decor, time spent with old friends and hobbies, etc. before you met him. Experiment with new things. Enjoy being yourself again.

Rightchoiceat46 · 30/06/2017 20:40

Hey good news about the flat.

So he has resorted to fake news, the idiot.

Stay strong.

CharlieBB22 · 30/06/2017 20:40

Congratulations on the flat! Hope you get through the weekend okay, stay busy - maybe even start packing so you can be up and out quickly when the time comes. You've earned a drink this week just keeping it together!

I agree with the no contact and no FB knowledge. I do hope you have change your status to 'single' though!

Ginkypig · 30/06/2017 20:51

Your doing great! Congratulations on your new flat.

Just acknowledge that you will have crap and ok emotions for a little while and that is a completely normal response to a horrible situation and don't be too hard on yourself about whatever you feel for the next while ok.

ProphetOfDoom · 30/06/2017 21:07

That's lovely news about the flat.

The crashing & tears are to be expected because you're still dealing with the shock of it all, processing fast & been running adrenaline. You're not being 'weak' - it's weirdly just what you ought to be doing as part of being strong.