From Russia With Love (earrings 2)

[MarilynMonsoon]

Can't believe so many of you helped me that I need a new thread!?

No contact tonight, dread tomorrow's return to the flat though

The thing is, even if you were a hysterical woman who'd thrown him out over a misunderstanding, he'd still look an utter melt for ranting about it on Facebook.

Hi Marilyn,
Now is the time to remember the YouTube video about reaction or response. (Thank you to the person who posted that, sorry I forgot your name.)

What he says is irrelevant to you, ok?.
No matter who he says the bs to- it isn't about you. You know the truth, and others can see the awesome person you are and will also know the truth.
He is having a tantrum and is only further (if that's possible) embarrassing himself. He is drowning in humiliation and is trying to scratch out a single micron of self respect...of course this will be at your expense (he can dream on).

People in FB may be entertained by his drama, but, imho, no one is going to believe a single thing he says. Who on earth would believe that bloke? He has shot himself in both feet, his own ass, his test-tickles (as Elmo would say) and in the one grey cell he had (the one that got with you in the first place).

Ignore. Easier said than done, I know. He is now in your past. Leave him in your past. Just leave it.

Keep an eye on security. Keep your friends monitoring the social media in case it ramps up to levels that the police would need to get involved.

Great news about the flat! Koko

Post this on face book followed by ....from Russia with love.

I do think he knows you've blocked him so he's having another attempt to get a reaction. Your doing amazing, I agree with what someone else said, think about a few short term goals and maybe one a little further..., nothing too heavy but just little goals to focus on in between the lows x

He is a sobbing wreck of a man. Taking to Facebook with his tales of woe. How old is he, seriously? You have swerved a bullet. You may feel wobbly but even at your wobbliest you are stronger than this twerp.

Have been lurking too. OP you are fantastic! Chin up, onwards and upwards.
P.S: Can people please stop calling OP's ex a cunt as it implies depth and warmth.

Ugh, and he's a Facebook dramatist? Brilliant.

It bears repeating...you are too good for him.

This guy is something else.

So he's been shagging a colleague: which the office gossips will have on their radar by now - and now he's boohooing all over social media, where undoubtedly people from his work will be too...

I'd be so embarrassed I'd have to resign. He's going for the hat trick it seems: losing partner, home and job.

Utter penis.

Yep, people who see that on Facebook will not be thinking "Oh, Marilyn must have been a total unreasonable cow".

I cannot believe the cheek of him though, cheats, gets found out, then feels he's the wronged party.

Keep your dignity Marilyn you're doing amazing. He is continuing to demonstrate the 'real' him. With the disgustingly abusive texts. The lies to his mother. The rage and smashing things when he collected his stuff. Threatening the police on you before he found out Russia didn't want him. Dear me. A pathetic excuse for a human. A lying scumbag full of vitriol and utter nastiness.

Stupid man. He's trying to salvage his dignity only he's making it a whole lot worse. Keep digging fella.

Genuine question how old is he? I know you mentioned your age.

Why do people think putting bullshit on FB will endear them to others? Utterly mystifying ! It's not like you are going to read it and go, "Oh, OK. Come home love, I'll get the kettle on." Fuck sake!

" thrown out, by hysterical woman over a misunderstanding, basically."

Good grief.

So you misunderstood when he told you that he was seeing someone else?

Even if that were true, it doesn't matter.

You can end a relationship for any reason or just because you want to.

His permission isn't needed.

Unless you have missed out an awful lot that happened I am confused as to how you are confused over catching him out cheating and him saying yay I am free to go shag my younger blonde and have DC with her as he skipped out the door with out a care for your feelings. Then send you those texts. Then go and try to shack up with said blonde.

The misunderstanding was his. That he was God's gift. That the blonde wanted him or that you would take him back despite his actions.

The only hysterical one is him getting drunk and getting to the stage where he smashes this game at your house and behaves so bad the neighbours threaten to call the police.

Pah, Facebook. Anyone who knows anything about the situation knows it's bollocks. His best mate knows it's bollocks. His social media rantings aren't your problem.

Maybe the hysterical woman with the misunderstanding is Anne Boleynski?

Because you certainly seem to understand everything very clearly

Wow, he's turned into quite the little narcissus hasn't he?

Everyone else to blame but him.

If he finds a way to contact you, via friends, mum or face to face I'd have the stock response...

So far, since I caught you cheating, every single behaviour you've demonstrated has simply convinced me more profoundly that I took the right decision in cutting you from my life.

By this stage I would actually be considering a short cold-as-ice factual statement on my own facebook page.

Something like
Berk and I have separated after I discovered his ongoing x-month affair with Russki. Thank you so much for all your kind words and support.

Then turn off commenting too so it just stands there in its cold isolation.

Wow hes playing a dangerous game there, you could show anyone that visits you to try and sound out the truth any one of those deeply terrible text messages he sent you and he'd be blown out of the water permanently.

Don't take to Facebook - by doing this you will have more dignity than he has. Everyone knows when we see people's life stories on FB it's cringey. Sharing with hundreds of friends/people your personal life. I don't get why people do this. Airing your dirty laundry for all to see. It's cringey and it's entertainment more than anything. People look a good gossip and nosey into someone else's private life.
Keep it private, in conversation term, between whoever you wish to tell.
He on the other hand can do what he wants, as his whole FB will be laughing at him.
Silence is golden....

I agree with those who say don't take it to Facebook. I think we've all felt the temptation to make our passive aggressive rants on there, but we've also all seen what it actually looks like when people do...and it's just one of those things that never works.

Even his best mate knows the truth. I really don't see how a story this straightforward and well documented can get Chinese whispered into anything much past what it really is. Even if a few ignorant gossipy twits out there who don't know you think differently...honestly, who cares? You're never going to get universal popularity. Just get on with your life free to be yourself, an individual, and open to meeting a good man.

I agree with poster who suggests that you put up one very short message ''marriage over, husband was having an affair, I'm ok, moving in to a new flat, thanks". And then stay off fb for a while.

" Don't wrestle with a Pig, you'll get dirty and the Pig will enjoy it ".... No Fb Marilyn, he's goading and wanting a reaction......when I had to speak to the police in my dim and distant past about an abusive ex the advise I was given was not to contact him as " Don't reward him with your attention".... Best advice they could have given me....sorry to be crude but he's not worth the steam off your piss ( and no I'm not normally this crude but if there was ever a situation worthy of that comment it's this one!!!)...keep on keeping on my love!!! You are an amazing woman!!!!xx

And in your new flat you need to print off your threads so far and put them in a book marked "the story of how strong, awesome and brilliant I am and I know this because MN told me so" to read just when you need reminding.

Have been lurking, also thinking you fabulous and wishing you the best in YOUR lovely new flat. A good distraction now, planning that and how good it's going to look/smell, how you'll furnish it etc...

You need to tell people NOT to tell you what shite he is posting on FB. No contact means NO CONTACT.

Make sure you have blocked anyone he might be associated with as otherwise the next thing will be a tagged photo of him with a mystery woman popping up in your news feed from a mutual friends post.

Don't retaliate on fb. Honestly, a few weeks from now you won't give a rats arse what any of his friends or family think, just let him crack on and do whatever he wants to do.

Your best revenge is absolute radio silence.