Another Boring Prostitute/Husband one :(

[wotabastard]

Opened H's gmail on his laptop totally innocuously to access mine and low and behold there was an email from u k pun tin a registration email from last Monday = (don't want to link back to that scum) As you can imagine, well, I'm shattered. Two dd's, married 2013, together over 10 years. Did some digging and managed to change his password so I could access his account but there is nothing to be seen, he's not participating in any threads at all.

I was hoping there would be a private messaging thing so I could get some cast iron proof of whatever he's engaging in, but nothing, or am I missing something? I came and did some digging here and read a few threads on the subject, saw someone advising to enter username and adultwork into google, another escort site, to find feedback, so I entered his username for the other site, and he has five positive feedback listed from 2013- April 2016 on there.
His account is not active on there though anymore, so I imagine he can easily bullshit that away, though one of the girls is literally a 10 minute from us, the others all in local cities.

I'm angry I don't have clear and irrefutable proof of communications etc. I want to be able to nail the bastard up to a fucking wall with the evidence when I confront him.

I have taken photos of everything I have found on my phone and will keep them safe until needed.

I logged out of the website I changed the password for and deleted all search history of my snooping. When he tries to log in I doubt he will suspect me, he's likely to brush it off as a glitch or attempted hack or something. He also doesn't know the password to my laptop or phone. Not out of me hiding anything, just well, WE TRUSTED EACH OTHER. What a joke.

We have been having tons of amazing sex recently too. Like, soul joining in love sex. What a dickhead.

Any advice? I'm going to get a full STI exam on Friday morning.

The begging might still come - he was probably in shock that you had discovered everything - and at the way you are handling everything.

It is sad when things are not what we have believed them to be.

It is difficult to be brave and do the right thing but you are doing it op - step by step you are doing the right thing to get your dc and yourself into a better place than where you are today.

The next bit won't be fun but children are so, so resilient and they will be fine.
Stay strong for them you're doing amazingly. And remember none of this is your fault x

Thank you so much

You're doing so SO well wot

Please remember this is HIS doing, not yours.

Your kids are more resilient than you know and they'll help you through. The toughest bit is done and it's now about taking a big deep breath & adjusting.

Has he actually left the house? I hope so. I hope he's being decent enough to give you space.

Thinking of you wotabastard. If you wobble, read your username again!!

He's in a hotel

I've just seen your thread. You sound incredibly brave. Your family is worth so much more. Not only are you doing this for yourself, you are doing this to protect your children and give them a good life.

Bloody hell ive just read this.

You sound like one hell of a woman and he is the scummuest of the scumbags

If I recall you are going to get your tests today. I hope everything is ok on that side.

You'll be in shock today and probably have a relief of tension. Try to keep hydrated and eat when you can, drink sugary tea and take care of yourself.

Don't be afraid to lean on your mum or friends for help.

He has to tell the children, you are right - he can come and take them out at the weekend to do that.

None of this is your fault, keep this as your mantra. He's made his bed, now he must lie in it.

Get a solicitors appt next week, and think about what you and the kids need. Act fast while he's consumed with guilt and still in the wrong. Men like this soon try and justify their foul behaviour. Don't listen to any bullshit.

Lots of love to you today sweetheart

Release not relief!

Sending support OP this is so hard and you're dealing with it brilliantly. It's going to be a hard time but keep reminding yourself you've done nothing wrong and that he brought this on himself

Sending hugs. Thank goodness you found out............. I promise that everything will be fine. X x x

He should be begging for your forgiveness but someone who willingly pays for prostitutes behind their wife's back probably doesn't see things in the same way as everyone else.

OP, the biggest hand hold for you for the next few weeks whilst this sorts itself out. I would be careful what he says to the children. What if he changes it to "mummy says I've hurt you". Subtle change to blame the break up on you. Yeah, he was the one paying for sex but you were the one to break up the marriage. He might see it like that. I hope he is a bigger man than that though and accepts that he is a scumbag.

You're doing so so well. Wish I could have been half as strong as you are being...

Try and keep busy. The children will hopefully be a fantastic distraction and focus.

Blimey OP. Just read the thread. You've been brilliant. So sorry this has happened. He doesn't deserve you. I hope he's really suffering for being such a weak, pathetic man.

Onwards and upwards for you now

Well done OP on being so strong

OP you are incredible!

Sending you ans your children a massive hand hold, you'll get through this !

Well done for dealing with it all so admirably, hugs to you x

Your kids may not be growing up with two parents in the same home etc. as you mentioned, but they are instead growing up knowing that it is not okay to disrespect and mistreat others, especially loved ones and that is a remarkable thing OP.

Just read all through the thread. Huge admiration for your strength OP, your setting a good example for your DC. It'll be a turbulent hellish time for the next few months but you will be fine and so much better off without him. Good luck today at the clinic xxxxx

Stay strong

So sorry to hear about your troubles but SO GLAD you found out. He could have passed on a life threatening STD. How DARE he?

You are doing brilliant and honestly, you just don't need his bullshit.

He'll try and minimise it / normalise it but he's a thriller seeker and an addict and you don't want your children raised with these morals.

You'll be fine eventually but hold your nerve and ground and demand and expect from him whatever you need to live a nice life with your children.

And don't think you'll have his family support either. They'll side with him. At best they'll be silent.at worse they will pin the blame on you.

You're amazing, he's scum and your children will be fine because YOU are their mum.
Sending you positive thoughts for you too.

I just don't get how these blokes think they can get away with it without their partners finding out. It's not that hard.
Wishing you all the best now that this rubbish is removed from your life.