Pictures - opinions on these texts please

[newnamechange84]

Just a small snapshot of what my 'd'p sends his 'friend'. Friend or more? Opinions please - this is a long running problem

Good luck Op.

I found similar messages in the winter. It's just such an awful feeling and he shouldn't be treating you with such disrespect and disregard. You have no children together which makes things easier for you, although it will still be terribly hard.

Op you are doing the right thing you deserve so much more in life then a looser like him. Your strong and we are all here for you stay strong hunni xxx

OP, I just wanted to pick you up on one thing you said at the very beginning.

It's not about being size 14 vs size 6. It's about him and his infidelity. When I was newly married in my 20's, i was size 6/8 and pretty (even though I didn't realise it at the time) and within a year he wanted to ditch me to be with another woman, several sizes bigger, not much to look at and much older than me. I remember thinking how could he when I am surely more attractive? It took me a long time to realise it's nothing to do with her attractiveness or mine, it's all to do with him being a cheat.

So please don't go down that road with yourself. It's tempting to, as this sort of thing knocks the confidence, but it's not based on the truth so don't let it become your truth.

Your being so strong and should be so so proud of yourself! He's a user and is going to have a big shock by the sounds of it when he doesn't have you to sponge off any longer. Don't believe the lies he's going to spill to get you to give him another chance because he will do it all over again with this girl, he clearly has feelings for her so let her put up with his shit. I hope you and your kids enjoy Disneyland ❤️

Pack his fucking bags and kick the bastard out. No way in hell he's innocent & you deserve MUCH BETTER!!!

Good Grief! You can't live with someone who tells someone he is flirting with that he will never be happy with you and 'when you know you know' . The only context for that is that he is clearly using you.

Using you to get through Uni , for s house, for a free holiday.

Never mind any fidelity questions, don't get sucked into 'did he, didn't he' 'would he, wouldn't he'. All irrelevant. His total betrayal is there, telling her he will never be happy with you while leeching off your money.

Leave her out of it, just kick him out with your head held high.

How on earth have you supported him on a student loan and afforded £2K on Disney?!!! . You need to do my budgeting for me

So glad to read you've got a firm plan of action. What an arsehole he is

Good luck OP. I shall be on here today for a hand hold along with the others.

You deserve so much better.

Hope you're okay OP.

My exP did something similar to me. I found messages to a friend of his ex (not even his ex!) minimising our relationship saying it was just a fling and he didn't mean it, when it certainly wasn't just a fling. The messages were really flirty, like 'ooh I'd love to see you in that new dress 😉', bleugh!!

Anyway I confronted him and ended up forgiving him, I was very young and stupid. It was the start of the end though and we didn't last much longer.

He's quite clearly paving the way too start something but she isn't interested. Does he think saying when you know you know, she's going to jump straight on him?

Totally edging his bets. If she gave the green light he would be all over her.

Quote his own words at him when you tell him it's over

"When you know, you just know"

Sorry you're going through this. Hope he suffers for being such a dickhead!

What a bastard, you deserve so much better than him!

Honestly the things he was saying about you! How dare he!

Pack his stuff and leave it outside. He's a loser.

Take and keep copies of all texts in various safe places. He will lie and minimise all this as I suspect he has been to you already if you've been arguing about his 'friendship' with this person.

Looking back at them can keep your resolve strong when it starts to weaken.

Wow. What a cheeky using bastard, leeching from you and getting his kicks pathetically trying to chat up young girls. I don't often agree with blaming the "OW", but laughing about hugging you?... Stace is an attention seeking cunt and "D"P is an even bigger cunt.

Completely agree with Ratatouille's text idea. And PP who have said change the names on the holiday and take a friend. There's no fucking way in hell I'd be supporting him in any way after disrespecting you so much.

for you OP. You deserve so much better!

Please stay strong with this OP, LTB with your head held high, or he will be the one leaving you for someone else as soon as they reciprocate his feelings. You will get lots of support and good advice here.

Thank you all so much. I think he might be onto me, need to get through today. I'll be updating cause this is one of the only things that is keeping me going.

Change the locks.

Don't keep any of his stuff, definitely don't keep his i-pad

Whilst it might feel satisfying in theory I wouldn't quote his texts or even tell him why he's out. He's the kind of creep who will blame you for looking at his stuff, tell you its in your head, and basically make it your fault. I wouldn't even hear him out. Don't be angry, just calm and unemotional.

Just say, its not working out, you've felt like this a while and you need to prioritise your children. Also, you can't afford him.

He has done before mpp. Says I shouldn't be looking through his stuff, if I trust him

I would actually put those messages on Facebook and tag them both. Maybe I'm an evil cow but he is actually a c&*t!! You deserve better. Change the name on the holiday and go with a friend. It's paid for anyway so don't waste it, it'll give you something to look forward to

Who WOULD trust him after the things you've seen?! He's not trustworthy in the slightest and those messages more than prove it. I would get his name taken off the holiday asap, its a shame for his kids but this is all down to him and they have him to thank for this.

Glad that you've got a plan of action OP. We're all here for a hand hold.

I don't think there's anything wrong with quoting his own words at him in a BRIEF message when you kick him out (let's him know exactly why he's out the door without the need for further explanation) but beyond that, I would try and keep your dignity and rise above it all. Definitely no drama and no messages to the OW. I know that it feels like it would be empowering but it's really not. It weakens your position. My mum sent a very dramatic message to my dad's OW and to be honest it just made her look like the crazy unhinged ex and played right into his hands. It didn't make the OW feel sorry or bad. It just made my mum a laughing stock. I tried to warn her but she wouldn't listen and now she wishes she had.

Good luck getting rid. He sounds gross.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Those messages must have been really hard for you to read 😕

Get rid of him, you're worth so so much more. Always remember your worth and don't let anyone or anything make you think different.

OP - sorry about all of this!

In the first screen - it says - 'there is no coming back from what had happened recently' - what is he talking about?
Have you been arguing?

It does all look like he is using her to offload. And she does the same.

Do not 'explain' to him why you want to end it. He will twist everything and find a way to put the blame on you. Before you know it you'll be apologising to him!

Just say you are not happy any more, can't see a future and want to be alone. Forget about getting an explanation off him as it's not going to happen with this man. You will never trust him and to stay with him will cause you enormous anxiety and stress (been there!).

Good luck OP. You know you're worth more than this shit