Dh has died and the MN lifesavers are helping us to keep our heads above water

[JuanPotatoTwo]

New thread :). Thought I'd start this one like I ended the last one - Bertie crashed out after a busy day's mischief making.

((hugs)) from me too Chasing - sounds to me like you have been holding the tears in, and once you let go, they are there, waiting to fall. So let them xx
Been crotcheting for Manchester, but just finished for the night - tired fingers .
Its rather warm - it has been scorching this afternoon, watering full blast.

Oh so sorry Chasing, its such a sad time for you. Absolutely no words can change this terrible loss you feel, but there in spirit for you

And for you too Juan

Night all, feeling quite sad now reading Chasing's update ....

Oh bugger, just lost a long post. The essence of it was Squirrels do whatever the fuck it takes to get through, especially tomorrow. I will think of you frequently tomorrow - I do anyway - but I know tomorrow will be hard. Let's face it, our situations are shit ones and nothing we do is going to give John and Mark back to us, so anything to get us through each second of each minute of each hard day is fine. We will get to a certain level of acceptability (if that's even a word) at some point - I presume - but what that level will be who knows? Won't be like it was with John and Mark but might be enough to get us through our lives with a modicum of contentment or whatever. Lots of love to you. And to others in our position too.

Morning ladies, just checking in to give you both a hug for the day ahead Juan and Squirrels

I've completely messed up my IT system for MN as I logged into the Ipad on my Google acc (never normally log in on there but wanted to check on Squirrel) and now I have 2 names and get email notifications to both email accounts

Morning all
Chasing - sending ((hugs)) and a shoulder to lean on today , hope you get through it, in whichever way you can x
Juan - yep, a level of acceptability , and I think maybe with accepting will come a bit of peace too xx
Well, a relatively un busy day - off to have a haircut this morning, and then off to town to do a bit of shopping , followed by a supermarket shop. I will get my lunch out too :) DD has asked for help in finding a uv swim hat for DGS -( he has a head rather like my DH - basically enormous ,) and the kids ones just do not fit , so scouring around to see if we can find an adult version that doesn't cost the earth. I found on on Mr Google, but £20 ? !!!
Have a good day all

Hi All

Squirrels sending virtual tissues and hand hold, if you need to cry then cry, you do what you have to do to get through this moment, this hour this day.

Juan thanks but nope it just got more surreal today, back on phone trying to get through to council again. It just seems one thing after another this past week and am drowning in 'stuff' I need to get done but just cant for some reason. I just seem to be in a fog at the moment. But will get there in the end no doubt.

P7 is 11/12y they go to high school at 12y. Am sure he is loving it they have such a lot of activities to keep them occupied and tire them out Dont tell him but forgot to feed the bloody guinea pigs first thing, was going out at 9.30 when it suddenly hit me!

Need to finish the bathroom off, just the velux to do and the bath panel. If I never see that bathroom again it will be too soon! Think I will get someone in to do my bedroom, my dodgy joints do not like all the climbing on chairs, and crawling about the floor doing skirting boards etc

I wrote a long post this morning but MN froze when I hit post and I lost it - grr.

Basically thanking you all, and saying I can't remember what. Sorry!

Today was better than last night (thankfully), with somewhat of a wobble when John's old friends texted to say they were thinking of us both - so I cried on our lovely receptionist. Then home to flowers on the doorstep from said friends, so lovely of them.

Glad things were a bit better today squirrels and that you have such nice friends.

Evening
good to hear from you Chasing , and glad that today wasn't quite as awful as it could have been. Lovely friends sending flowers .
Willow I never notice these things until the next day.when I can't move ..... decorating is just never ending once you start.
I have had a lovely day, and even managed to find a new top today - I have almost given up looking these days, so it was a bit of a surprise. DH needed to be in M&S for some bits, I went wandering off , found the top. Was still wandering when he came back with a 20% voucher off womens clothing , so rather pleased. Mind you, it was the only thing on 2 floors of clothes I liked at all!
I did forget to go and look at material though - one of the reasons I went to town
I see Murray is going to meet your fav Juan - no contest?
Have a nice evening folks
Thoughts and Prayers x

Good find, and bonus on the 20% off!

Am looking at holidays for the boys and I in the summer holidays.

Thinking of you today in particular Squirrels Love to you also Juan

I've just had a lovely BBQ tea while listening to DD1 telling us all about her first day shadowing teachers at DD2's school getting experience before starting her PGCE in the autumn. Everyone seemed surprised that she was DD2's sister. DD2 is not a model student but teachers are fond of her due to her personality

I've had acupuncture today for my frozen shoulder. It was a very strange sensation but I've got more movement so I'm happy.

Heading to Liverpool at the weekend to take MIL to the Sgt. Pepper anniversary concert. She is a huge tennis fan so will be happy to sit with me and a glass of wine while chatting tennis. Only me and SIL3 are happy to watch tennis with her so she is looking forward to our visit.

Evening all. Hope you've all made the most of the sunshine.

Had a stressful day mostly of my own making/stupidity but so many moany moments by the smalls that I've threatened to bring them home tomorrow the moment I've had enough of them (and can follow through as we've got annual passes so not spending money as such)

Thinking that I will turn in super early and then maybe we'll all be a bit brighter tomorrow

I'm glad that your day wasn't too bad Squirrel, friends sound lovely and holiday plans like a good distraction.

Good that the acupuncture worked wife, not something that appeals to me bug I had acupressure on my back years ago and it was amazing.

Hope you have a decent night sleep cake and a better day tomorrow.

I'm still reading book - the love story that was making me cry. Well it just did a number on me, I'm at about 80% but can't keep my eyes open will have to put it down. It's The Turning Point by Freya North.

Hugs Juan

Hope you got some sleep! DS woke at 5:30, I'd been awake for a bit by then. Can hear snoring from upstairs.

Have to say I'm not feeling better, but at least it's a new day. Have to see ex tomorrow at the bank so anxiety quite high...

Thinking of everyone.

Straight to sleep after I posted that cake, if I had smalls at home waking me at ungodly hours like you do I'd have to be asleep earlier.

Work again today, not totally sure how feeling about it - up and down like everything else I suppose?

Morning
a bit behind schedule today.
Last night was much too warm for me, humid , so didn't sleep well, so got up a bit late.
Just dashing off to do a bit at the allotment, but not too much, then home for a shower.
Cake - a hand hold - doesn't sound like you are too good, but sending you some (hugs)
Woolly - so at last the acupuncture is helping - good to hear. My DD did her PGCE a few years ago now - really opened her eyes ( I don't know if it will be the same thing, but she had to do two placements - one was in one of the biggest most deprived areas in the North, second was a really top notch private school, where pupils got helipcoptered in!)
Must dash now
Thoughts and Prayers for all xx

Thanks book not much fun but so much better off than many, so trying to cling onto that!

We've only just got home and spent 6 hours out and had a blast!

Hugs to you all x

Good to hear you had a blast cake ☺

TheWoollybacksWife have you nc'd from another Woolly name?? I'm so dense sometimes.

Evening all. Cake I'm sorry you're having such a stressful time of it at the minute. And Squirrels glad you got through yesterday.

I went today, at my suggestion, to a garden centre nearby with a friend. It has a lovely cafe but I've avoided going there since Mark died because we went there often together as he liked it a lot. I was fine until we got to the counter when I just started crying. Friend ushered me to a table, and the lady serving us was also a friend so understood what had happened. It really came out of nowhere - one minute I was fine, the next - sobbing (as I am now retelling it:( ).

Yesterday I spoke to one of Mark's ex Headingly team mates I hadn't had a chance to speak to at the funeral and who I've never met. But he and Mark's best friend were out together so they rang and told me some stories of the old days! Cheered me up and made me sad all at the same time.

No real plans at minute for the weekend although I will of course be watching Pot playing Murray tomorrow. And getting angry with the commentators who always presume that every Brit automatically wants Murray to win!

Hope everyone has a good evening.

I feel so sad tonight. I keep looking at my phone screen saver (which is the picture I put up on the first thread I posted) and asking "why did you leave me?". I'm not angry with him, which I know is a stage of grief often to be got through, I just feel abandoned and bewildered and purposeless :(

Juan ((hugs)) - not sure I have any words that can help, but I am here with a shoulder to lean on.

((Juan)).
I often find myself saying, out loud, "why did you have to die John".
And, I want a shag.

Cake with IT ishoos again!

I really have nothing to moan about because through all the rubbish bits at least I know DH has my back. Must be so very hard for you both to not only have sole responsibility but also such a great loss.

I'm free Tuesday or Thursday if you'd like a coffee Juan

We spent a lovely day together and did lots of rides, had ice cream and donuts and then DD and I went to get the last few bits for her residential after tea.

How is this for a laugh... Let her look for shorts while I looked at shoes - independence and all that, and she came back saying the prints she liked are skirts. So told her to to bring some and we can try them on...turns out they weren't skirts but boob tubes

(Just for context, she's so tall she can shop on adult side, I don't normally take her to shops where they sell boobtubes for 10yos)

I'm going to try and turn in soon. Seeing ex tomorrow to sort bank stuff, big one has a cinema visit with a friend, small a birthday party to attend and MIL is arriving at 4pm so need to find time and energy to clean and cook a roast too!

ElPeskyJuan - so sorry you feel so sad, but (& I hate to say it) I think it is inevitable. And that you feel so lost - my heart goes out to you and I am sending you my love & lots of cyber hugs... (((xxx))).

I love Andy (despite all his mutterings) & hope he wins.

I love ElPot (:phwoar. phwoar: phwoar) & hope he wins.

If I was going to put money on it it would be with ElPot!

I will be watching from behind the sofa tomorrow!