Is anyone awake? I think I was just raped

[AskingForIt]

I'm in shock. I don't know what to do. My friends are sleeping

I hope you have seen the police OP

just hoping you're ok OP xxx

I have just seen this, i hope you are ok op.

Ive been raped and my biggest regret is not dealing with it, or even having the evidence saved so when i did change my mind i could use it. Now its too late.

Leave yourself that option.

As for not calling them because you were raped before, Its taken me a long time to realise this. But i was watching the Jimmy Savile documentary where one of his victims was asked "how he knew she'd been groomed by someone already so therefore vulnerable"

and she simply said something along the lines of "they know, they all know. They take one look at how you carry yourself and how your eyes cast down"

take care of yourself and take every bit of help you can get

Hope you are ok OP xx

So pleased you called 101 OP, that was such a brace thing to do. Hope you're doing okay this morning. Thinking of you.

Wish I had never called the police as I look very stupid now. Apparently there is no offence because I consented to other things 'so sex was the natural conclusion'

. What? I don't understand. I thought no meant no at any juncture. What did you say to prompt them to say this.

Even though he knew I didn't want to sleep with him and he said 'don't worry I won't have sex with you' just before having sex with me

Rubbish! If you have discussed not wanting to have sex, "progressing to sex" is rape!

Did you tell them this? I don't understand.

Wow, he's really pulling every trick in the book to blackmail you into silence. Please contact rape crisis so they can give you the best advice available on how to get the bastard dealt with. I hate to say this but it sounds like he was Grooming you all along because he knew you'd been rapes before. Fucking bastard.

What?

What the police gave told you is in direct contradiction to the law. There is no such thing as 'blanket consent' Please contact rape crisis who can show you how to make a formal complaint and get the original crime dealt with

I'm just exhausted and feel so stupid. It's happened too often and I'm ashamed of myself

But that can't be right. I thought consent could be withdrawn at any point and then if a man continued it was rape.

for you.

Christ almighty I'm completely appalled. I'm sure you don't have strength forcit right now but I'm furious on your behalf and really want to make a complaint about the policeperson who spoke to you. They're so wrong.

On a more helpful to you front I'm going to see if I can find a sexual assault helpline that does open on a Sunday. 💐

0808 802 9999

They're open now

Yep, that's how misogyny works. It's exhausting and makes the victim feel shameful, although you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, and he has everything to feel shameful about. You're going to need to find some strength from somewhere though and fight this. Is there anyone there with you who can support you? What did you actually say to the police about what happened? You can paraphrase if needed. Otherwise it's hard for us to offer practical advice.

According to the CPS, " consent can be withdrawn at any time during sexual activity". So what the police officer told you was actually factually incorrect - frighteningly so, if that is what they routinely tell victims of rape. Do you feel you have the strength to make a complaint?

Rape support open now.

www.supportline.org.uk/problems/rape_sexual-assault.php

Thank you everyone. Trying to get through

He basically went from one 'activity' to penetrative sex with no discussion or indication that's what he was about to do. He knew I didn't want to sleep with him and even said 'don't worry I won't have sex with you' just before hand. He is completely devastated and has no problem acknowledging what he did.

I'm so sorry you have been dreadfully let down. Your so called friend who didn't listen to you and took advantage of you when you are vulnerable, and the police who don't understand consent. I'm so sorry.

My head is even more messed up now

OP

I have been raped in circumstances similar to yours. We believe you. Keep trying to get through, my local sexual violence team were brilliant. We also have a specialist centre for victims of rape/sexual assault that you can self-refer to 24/7 365 - could you Google if there's one near you?