Dating Thread 117 - summer loving!

[InfoSec21]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

Where would the meet be?

All the communication is being done by private messaging rather than on a public forum. :)

I am about to send a group PM asking people their preferences for next steps - the one last night was really just to test if group messages even worked. We now know they can be sent, but replies come individually.

Just had breakfast date with an absolutely gorgeous man! Now fluttering between insecurity & exhilaration. What a rollercoaster...

Ooh, exciting Apple!

was in middle of messaging last night but current iron interrupted so didnt

so back today with commiserations Bant
well done cover

and yes would love to meet in London. Have messaged out

some positive news on OLD for a change I went into site last night after a few days to find Mr Social had taken himself off. Hadnt told me. Chatted later and said he wasnt comfortable seeing anyone else. But totally up to me what I do and wasnt going to push me or influence me. It just all feels easy and happy so said I would too. So know its not the norm but feels right. Feels lovely that we can just relax and get to know each other now. Date 4 next week.

Mumfun - yay, that's lovely to hear!!

It is exciting meeting someone with...potential. Particularly as I was beginning to get to the end of my tether. But! Now for the bit where you have see if he is all he appears, and if the attraction might be mutual. I don't think I'm great at reading signs and I'm no game player, so have taken the plunge with a complimentary thank you and let's do it again soon text. We shall see.

Apple - I'mthe same as you: not great at reading signs and wary of my instincts given my awful track record.

Mum - that's very gracious of Mr Social. I'm not sure I could handle if I knew The Nurse was still dating others (he may be, I'm not certain). Perhaps I'd be less inclined to want complete exclusivity if we weren't sleeping together.

It's like buying a house or going for a job interview - you kind of picture yourself moving in or getting the job...your imagination runs riot and BOOM, you get your hopes up before there is any real justification. Does anyone else do that, or am I just over excitable?!

Apple I definitely do that. Mr Bike doesn't have DCs and I wonder ahead how that will work actually imagine how days out could work , yet we're still getting to know each other so I shouldn't rush my thoughts.

I'm in the SW and can't meet in London but hope it goes well.

Should this London meet up take place in the first half of the Cornish half term (I think that's about the 26th- 31st) I may well be up for crashing. That way I can reward myself for the long, terrible slog up the A30/ A303 with two children (one a toddler) to my parents' in the Home Counties with booze and adult conversation (my parents don't count as adults, conversationally speaking).

Ah London is a bit far for me really, are most people here way down South?

Would this be a terrible way to find out if mr. Reallife is single or not...
(I did find his lookalike online on dating sites) asking him if it was him i spotted on tinder?

In my head it could go great. I thought i best get a different opinion just incase im warped though.
I might not even have it in me to mention it but it seems so much easier than just asking him outright. Because im a wimp

Nipples imagine if he looked at you in horror and denied it. Much simpler to just ask him if he fancies meeting up for a coffee/drink I think?

If you find out he is single you still need to actually ask him out.

How would you feel if a guy you'd been on 5 dates (over a month) and slept with a few times/talked to every day was still on tinder? He seemed smitten (and I am!) but we haven't had a chat about it. We met on there....
I've also noticed his location change a bit which is seemingly the only way to tell if someone actually has been active.

Nipples some people think Tinder is a bit out there and just for sex, so if he is single, isn't on it, and now knows you are....that could backfire!

See...this is why i needed opinions from others haha. Im so pleased i didnt see him today.
Am i alone on how fearful i am of rejection? Even though i really wouldnt be too bothered if he did reject. At least then id know. It doesnt help that i have never had to ask anyone out

You are not alone - but, really, it's not the end of the world if one person doesn't fancy you, rejection might seem bad but it's not.

If you can't front it out with him the best way is to make something up, like "I have to hang around after work tomorrow, meeting a friend at seven, she can't get here any earlier, do you fancy keeping me company for a coffee in the meantime?". ('she' can then text and cancel...)

I think I may be the lone northerner on this thread! Enjoy the meet up but it's a bit too far for me.

Youre right. Im just going to have to pluck up the courage and go for it one way or another.

Im a northerner too, chucklecheeksagain ☺

Northerner here too!
I'm meeting with up later for date number 2 (same guy) it's so lovely outside so hopefully we can catch the last hour in the sun.
I will update!
Does anyone else have any dates planned?

I'm a Northener 🙂🙂

Maybe we should have a northerner group meet up info !