My fucking, fucking husband

[CheesyChristie]

He's been a monumental shit to me since ds2 was born (18 months ago). It all came to a head a couple of weeks ago and I told him I was leaving if he didn't change. We had a really good talk, I explained everything I was unhappy about - having fallen into being a sahm so he can focus on his career

• moving to other side of country, again so he can focus on job
• him leaving me in the house from 6am to 9/10pm due to combination of staying at work and running/ cycling to station rather than driving even when I had gastritis and was crying asking him to come home and help me
• refusing to believe ds1 has autism despite diagnosis, thinks I am just overreacting to his behaviour as I can't cope with him
• offering no support when I was diagnosed with pnd, not once in the last year asking how I feel about it, anything.
• refusing to acknowledge ds1 needs any additional support

-doing nothing with the kids, ever Loads of other stuff I can't even think of now, but generally just treating me as a skivvy and not his wife.

Anyway after a long talk he promised to change. Look into doing one day a week from home. Only run to station once a week. Plan activities for weekend once a month.

I've just looked at my phone and I've had a missed call from his office at 3.30. He does this when he goes out with workmates - rings once when he's leaving so I can't get arsey because he didn't tell me he was going out. This means he'll be getting a taxi back from the station which costs about £35. Ds1 has an important grading tomorrow at 8.30am. It's the one thing he enjoys and is really good at. He is excited about it and I've never seen him excited before. I cannot attend if ds2 is there - ds1 needs me in the room and ds2 screams because he can't run around. Dh will not be able to look after ds2, he'll spend the morning still drunk, puking and shitting. I'm sat here sobbing.

The absolute fucking, bellend, arsecock. I want to go home. I just want my mum. I just can't do all this on my own.

Sorry, just wanted a rant really. I live in the arse end of nowhere, lived here for two years and still don't have any friends here.

Wonderful to hear you're getting some much needed support OP. Talk it all through with your mum and don't make any rush decisions, take your time xx

Bagel has taken the words out of my mouth.

Without sounding like a weirdo I've been thinking about this thread all day and hoping you just GTF outta there.

A loving and kind parent to fall on at a time like this is an absolute godsend. And she'll want to do all she can to help so let her. You're someone's child, let yourself be looked after too instead of having to steer the ship all the time.

Actually bowled over at the clear-sighted manner you've acted in. 100% impressed.

Oh well done!!! You've done brilliantly getting all that done so smoothly. You sound like a lovely mum who has a lovely mum.

You don't need that cunt

Well done, OP!!! You and your children deserve so much more.

Good luck.

All mums should be like yours. Good luck

Well done OP, if you're feeling better already it was clearly the right decision.

Well done, take your time now for a few days and take anything your husband says with a large pinch of salt

Well done lovely

I too had been wondering how things went today. These things are always hard, but nothing would be harder than going back to him.

Your dc have a great mum and a great grandma.

You've done your best. You let him know how you felt, and gave him a second chance. He didn't take it - his choice. So now you've made your choice, and it'll be the start of a new life, with you in control and the tablets in the bin.

Well done to you and your DS1

Well done you. It takes a lot of strength to do as you have done; don't forget that.

You must feel great that you've taken a positive step - this way it gives you time to think and for your OH to have a wake-up call (or start preparing for the next phase of things). Hope your mother is supportive and that you manage to relax over the weekend.

Can't believe it's so late and your husband hasn't bothered to contact you! What a twat.

Seriously, has he not even phoned to see where you are??

Excellent move. Switch your phone onto silent. Does he know you've even gone? Maybe get your DM to text him in case he calls the police to report you missing. Or get your DM to call him? I'm sure he'd be delighted to have a chat with her.

Oh bless you OP, so glad you're with your mum.

If I were you I'd text your horrible husband tomorrow and tell him you want him out so you can go back and get DS sorted for school on Monday without him there if you need to.

Excellent move. Be with your mum. Tell her everything. Good luck OP.

Well done and don't go back to that idiot

I'm sorry OP, you are being perfectly reasonable, he isn't. What did he used to be like before children?

Just read the whole thread. Wasn't expecting that update and I'm so pleased for you!

Get your dc down on the school register in your mum's area. Apply for whatever you need as a single parent and get the ball rolling.

Your H is a knob. He has thrown away a wonderful woman and two children because he put himself first. I hope he's happy in his house all by himself. Twat.

Ah, so pleased to read your update. Doing everything that you managed to do today showed great resilience, tenacity, a cool head, mental strength and motherly love. It may be a defining day in your life. Best of luck for the future.

Well done. Be with people who care and can support you.