Dating Thread 116 - come join us!

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Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

Runny, so sorry about that. I am new to this OLD (a couple of weeks) and already nothing surprises me any more.

Sorry to hear that runny

Hello all, sorry to hear about that runny, hope today goes ok for you.

bant glad the date went well for you.

My date was fun last night but no spark for me. I didn't fancy him. So I've sent the message (and feel really bad).

I did drunk text the other guy and asked him if he wanted a second date and he said he did, so that's one good thing that came out of it!

Am probably having another first date tomorrow (daytime) too.

I've suddenly got loads of activity on GSM which is surprising.

Really sorry to hear your update, RunnnyMummy. He doesn't deserve you. However you do it, dump his sorry ass!

Gutted for you runny, good luck today. Interested to hear his excuses later. What a dick.
Enjoy your third date Bant! Sounds like things are hotting up!
I've somehow ended up with 2 men and I'm stuck. Mr Accent is only free in the mornings so we have coffee/sex in the half hour before I go to work. He works evenings and can't get to my house anyway because he doesn't have a car. But the sex is mind blowing. Mr local is everything I thought I wanted but the sex is appalling. I need to let one down very gently asap but can't choose. Never thought I'd be in this position

Aaaw runny, was saddened to read your recent update
Not much to say other than he sounds like a right twat, and as much as it hurts now I think it's much better you find this out about him now rather than further down the line when feelings are stronger etc, see him for what he is - a slippery, untrustworthy guy who did you a favour by sending flirty msgs to a profile with no pic (who does that?!). Onwards and upwards... move on and find one of the good 'uns.

Runny sorry to hear that, it is horrible, it happened to me after we'd agreed to hide profiles etc, is a real blow. Some people try to shrug it off as it's just social chatting but it's crap. If you're dating someone why would you be talking to anyone else after the exclusivity chat. Just a word of caution Mr M put the blame fully at my door, called me paranoid etc and made me feel very wobbly about it all. Take care and good luck.

Sorry about that runny. That's one of my main worries about meeting someone on tinder. It seems like such a sweetshop. Agree with pp who said it is prob a bit addictive.

So I've had to cry off my date tomorrow with Irish Guy because my wisdom teeth are really not healing well. I've been in a&e twice since weds! It's awful, as I'm completely debilitated and certainly kissing would be off the menu. Have sent a contrite message asking if he could do later this week but feel nervous about it (prob irrationally)- I really hope he doesn't get put off! (But i guess if he does he's not the one..)

Mangoandpassionfruit Agree completely. When you're really into someone, you don't want to have random chats with random people to stroke your ego. Sorry you had that experience with Mr M.

RunnnyMummy As Dudette29 says, I can't believe he was tempted by a profile with no photo! Final insult. Fake you might not have been half as attractive as real you, and he went fishing anyway!

MrsPussinBoots I couldn't sleep with two men at the same time, but seeing as you have - sounds like there's a clear winner! If Mr Local were to move further away or change his working hours so he was only available at the same time as Mr Accent, how would you feel? Because availability is not a personality trait or physical aspect, it's something that can and does change.

After my experience with Mr Super Hot, I'm leaning towards Mr Accent. Are his hours so strange because he has DC? What about weekends? There is something to be said about mind-blowing... You can always train someone to be better, but mind-blowing is a special category.

I have actually ditched all of my irons because I know none of them would be as good at Mr Super Hot and I cannot stop thinking about snogging him the other day. We're not right for each other, definitely not now anyway, but I'm half-tempted to engineer running into him next week to test the theory. I've never been tempted to chase someone so clearly unsuitable, but equally, those wandering hands did wonderful things!

Princessmollygolly Sorry to hear you're in so much pain still. Timing is a bitch. Hopefully Mr Irish Guy will wait until you're feeling better but most importantly, I do hope you feel better soon. Sounds like you're having a fairly miserable Easter weekend.

Aw sorry to hear you are in pain princess. Hope you feel better very soon.
Enjoy the third date bant.
I have a second date next week and I'm going on another first date tonight. I'm not all that enthused about dating these days. Sometimes I still miss my ex even though he abused me. But I'll get over it. There are many people in the world.
I inexplicably felt upset last night. I've been taking to someone for ages and ages. I wasn't 100% sure I'd like them. They were v cultured, serious, intellectual and vegan (I'm an omnivore). I mentioned I'd been doing something with my children. He sent me a long but nice message back saying he wasn't sure what I was looking for, but he wouldn't get into a serious relationship with someone with children. He said he was sure my children were lovely (that really grated for some reason, though I know he was trying to be nice) and he was sorry he hadn't realised my situation.
I do have it on my profile that I'm a mother. I don't talk much about the dc on messaging apps, unless it comes up. I don't like to. That part of my life is private. Of course I know that loads of people would rather date someone with no dc. It was just the way he said ' my situation' as if it was so out of the ordinary. Why assume a mid 30s woman doesn't have children?

Farontothemaddingcrowd if you had it on your profile then it is his mistake. I prefer not to mention my kids in my profile, but I drop the fact that they exist into messages early on. Like you I find it silly if someone assumes that a person in their thirties or forties doesn't have kids. If it's important they should ask.

Yes exactly. If it's vital then you ask or look properly at their profile. But my children are not 'a situation.'

Thanks Pringle and madding. I've had a hell of a time since weds- the op was bad enough but it's been worse since, I would probably rattle with painkillers if someone shook me! Not easy coping with a 2yo dd as well. I currently can't really open my mouth so worst of all Easter choc is off the menu (and my Lindt dark chocolate bunny will have to wait )
Got a nice message back v quick from Irish Guy saying no worries about tomorrow and he could do whenever I feel better this week I think end of week is sensible as I have awful swelling and pain and probably will til tomorrow, but I don't want to appear like I don't want to see him, which I really do!! Still as he's not free tues I think I'll suggest thurs/fri to be on safe side. Absolutely awful timing- I've been gagging to go to bed with him see him since our date last Sunday!!

Morning all.

Runnny - that's shit of him. It's one thing to tie up a few loose conversations with people, it's another to be responding to new messages - and flirting with someone when you don't know what they look like - well that's just addiction. I'm sorry.

Date 3 went well. It. Erm. Ended about an hour ago..

I've had almost no sleep. :)

My rule about waiting until date 5 or so seemed to go out of the window when she asked if she could stay over.

I won't see her again for a few days but I'll need that to recover anyway.

mrs pussinboots the only thing re mr accent is the culture differances.
From my experience merging too totally different cultures is hard and they often pine after there own women after so long.

I renember in a previous thread you said he was born in turkey? if he's from an eu country this probably doesn't apply so ignore above.

Ooh v exciting Bant!

Runnny sorry to hear about this guy messaging others. He will try to talk his way out of it I'd imagine, although not sure how that would be possible.

Bant that's amazing. Sounds like it's going really well for you!!

Not much news from me, haven't found my new car yet. Women? None of them either!!

Just on my way to another date. Currently juggling three irons (that I've actually met). This is a date 1. I'll call him wildcard.

Juggling irons sounds dangerous doesn't it?

Bant that's great news, rules are made to be broken if it feels right

Far good luck with the date, when i first started dating I only did one iron at a time but that was too much with the high and lows. I've found having a few stop OI too much

Well my fresh meet theory has worked. Having a month out to regroup and then come back has give me time to revaluate what I want from all this and I just had the ideal date.
Mr southern picked me up this morning due to my broken arm and not been able to drive. We went to a Manor House where we walked the grounds with a coffee and had to hide under the trees when it started chucking it down. Conversation flowed with ease so we went to a country pub he knew of for dinner. He thanked me for a lovely date with a little kiss and dropped me home where I kissed him and he asked for another date when he gets back from business this week.

This is the kind of dating I want!!!

Ahh minop that sounds lovely.
I am on my way to date no 1 with Mr Italy, have three other irons, one seeing tomorrow. Agree it really helps with the over investing. Experience with with Mr M really, nearly made me fall over. You do have to have a thick skin. Not sure quite there yet. Runny, hope it's going ok and you've sorted things one way or the other.
Bant out of interest has that made you feel any differently about having a relationship with her having gone against your usual rules?

I am liking Mr Wildcard. Quite a lot. He likes me, I can always tell.

Another one here going well...only had one date and I'm very hopeful of him being the one for me! I should be cautious as I've been here before but I really do believe it's special just by the way we are already...

Time will tell no deed been done yet