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The yuk factor

162 replies

Snotmeitsyou · 27/03/2017 19:18

Not sure if I am in the right forum here but anyway. DP stays with me most weekends as he works away. Been together for 18 years but not lived together - reluctance on my part really.
DP seems to have some mucky behaviours I struggle with. For example, this weekend he uses loo as usual, flushed several times, then uses loo brush to 'help' contents of pan flush away. Loo brush back in holder, covered in poo. I then have to clean brush and holder.
Last week I found poo smears on wall next to loo roll. He must have got his hands dirty wiping arse then used loo roll.
He recently got into car with big poo smear up back of t-shirt. I guess he wiped bum but belt was in way and smeared his shirt.
Using his car I found crispy stuff under driver's seat - he had wiped nose on hand then wiped under seat I guess.
He can't eat a meal without getting food around face or on clothing/floor.
All this makes me feel queasy and affects how I feel about him. He is a good person but thinks I over react. He finds it funny.
Is it me or am I being a bit too fussy here?

OP posts:
hellsbellsmelons · 28/03/2017 10:11

18 years and you still don't live together (not surprised)
Is this relationship going anywhere.
If after 18 years you aren't committed to each other it seems a bit pointless???

AromatAddict · 28/03/2017 10:14

Blink Confused

blink182 · 28/03/2017 10:25

Hehe exactly Aromat, and I'm now getting flashbacks of her stuffing chocolate and crisp wrappers down the side of the sofa and behind the sofa....

And all over the car....

Always got food down her top when eating as well...

My lord - what a catch - I am in such a better place now, wouldn't put up with that nonsense.

IHeartDodo · 28/03/2017 10:25

Oh My God what have I just read!!!
Unless he has medical/special needs of some kind (in which case he needs a carer) I would not let him in my home!

DaisyBlameless · 28/03/2017 10:29

Leave him before you catch hepatitis from the dirty bastard.

maras2 · 28/03/2017 10:48

I'm on Statins but only manage to poo every other day. Confused
He's just dirty.

pangolina · 28/03/2017 11:22

If he has always been like this and remains 'unaware' then you only have two options: accept that this is who he is or leave. I cannot imagine that he will suddenly see the light. If I got poo on the walls or my clothes I'd be so paranoid about it happening again that I can't imagine it could.
How is your relationship aside from this?
Also, stop cleaning up after him

aSleepyPrincess · 28/03/2017 11:43

I actually can't believe what I have just read, there truly are some filthy people on this planet. I makes me so sorry to think that you would feel you were over reacting to shit up the bathroom wall and on your partners shirt, I mean really? I would have hit the bloody roof at the dirty bugger!
As a separate point, you mention the dogs being prolific pooers? I have to wonder at the smell that must greet you when you arrive home.......Shock

mortificado · 28/03/2017 11:49

This is grim. 😷

UpYerGansey · 28/03/2017 11:58

He'd last all of 18 minutes in my house.
I'm sorry you've found yourself in this situation.

He needs to clean up his act 100%, or take himself and his utterly grim arse elsewhere.

FeliciaJollygoodfellow · 28/03/2017 12:52

Ew this is gross.

I had a boyfriend once like blink182's wife - he'd scratch his arse, literally his arsehole, sniff his fingers and then not wash his hands. He stunk. I put up with it because I was young and in love - if DH did that when we first met I would have told him where to go.

I'm torn between feeling a bit sorry for him because he clearly hasn't been taught how to wipe his arse, and completely incredulous that he hasn't been able to learn in the however many years he's been doing it himself. My five year old doesn't get shit up his back or on the walls and he's only been doing it a couple of years!

Adora10 · 28/03/2017 13:25

Even if he was not taught he's a bloody adult and has eye and hand co ordination so he's choosing to half clean his arse, and leave half his shit over the house; how on earth can you even be in the same room as this vile sub human; it's just not right.

ScrambledSmegs · 28/03/2017 13:43

It's the fact that he finds it funny Angry. If he was deeply mortified and promised to try and be less repulsive when you confronted him then I'd be inclined to be slightly more forgiving, but to laugh? It shows little respect for you and your feelings.

In answer to your question - no, you aren't fussy, quite the opposite in fact. Also, trust you own emotions ok this - no one has the right to tell you how you should feel.

Fruitcocktail6 · 28/03/2017 13:44

This is disgusting. I work with three year olds and they manage not to get shit on their clothes. Ffs.

Patriciathestripper1 · 28/03/2017 13:45

EnvyEnvyEnvy not envy what a pig

JustSpeakSense · 28/03/2017 13:51

This is absolutely disgusting and not at all normal.

ShootFruit · 28/03/2017 13:53

I was half way through my lunch when I opened this post. Read the op and I can't eat any more. Good grief I can't believe you've put up with this dirty creature for so long Confused. It's not normal.

However, some of the responses on here made me howl with laughter. The kids think I've lost it!

shakeyospeare · 28/03/2017 13:54

off point A housemate from years ago once used the bathmat to wipe his arse on and then hung it back over the bath, with a YUGE shit stain.

Apparently it was my turn to buy toilet paper...

ShootFruit · 28/03/2017 13:58

Pineappleeyes wtf, ** im trying to figure out why he didn't clean his arse first before cleaning the floor! What did he expect having his reversing shitty arse bare to the wind but for it to hit something. Some of you have met some fright disgusting buggers. Just grim!

But funny Grin

murphys · 28/03/2017 14:03

You say everyone else has always cleaned up after him, so now is the time for that to change OP.

I think you have had a unnecessarily hard time here, but it really isn't normal behaviour, hence the shock factor.

I went to the toilet at one of my clients, and there is a big sign up... to the lady that smeared her sanitary towel all over the wall... please bear in mind that other ladies use this bathroom, and who do you expect to clean it up. Please clean it and refrain from doing it again here.

The fact that a sign had to be put up as someone had done this...boggled the mind...

Adora10 · 28/03/2017 14:04

The one that made me laugh was the guy on all fours going backwards wiping the shit off the floor only to bang his shitty arse into the bathroom door, I mean, who the hell are these people PMSL

Deathraystare · 28/03/2017 14:52

I find it disgusting and offensive. He thinks it is funny and is DISRESPECTING you. I hope uyou don't have kids. Seriously if your little kid was doing this, you would wonder what was wrong with them. You must see that from the remarks on here it is NOT NORMAL.

SabineUndine · 28/03/2017 16:11

What are the rest of his family like? I mean, normally, kids get shown how to clean themselves as soon as their arms are long enough to reach. Didn't his parents bother with him? He certainly isn't behaving normally at all, and I'd have dumped him years back.

LorLorr2 · 28/03/2017 16:16

If I was with someone who did this but they were otherwise nice, caring and all the other qualities I love then I wouldn't dump him as his weakness here is something that can be improved with teaching!

Adora10 · 28/03/2017 16:28

How romantic, spending 18 years of your life teaching an adult how to clean his own arse.

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