Dating Thread 115 - come join us!

[InfoSec21]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

I saw them seven times last year, but they had a new album and were on tour - one was a pre tour gig and one was a free record shop thing for the album launch. Though two were two nights in a row :)

They're in Mexico currently and I did consider going to see them but it's a festival rather than a simple gig, and you get less of them at a festival. I went to one festival to see them last year (not Glasto, though they were there) and there is one this year I might go to.

It's strange to actively choose not to see a band twice, if you like them.

Yeah, I don't get that mentality at all. Seeing a band you love is better than listening to an album. So isn't is the same as asking why you'd listen to an album more than once?

They are well known as an excellent live band, really interactive with the audience and put on a great show. Honestly different every time.
I have no kids (and no partner!) a good job, no debts (not even a cc outstanding or a car loan) and my own home (subject to moving currently of course) so what I do with my money isn't really of her concern.

Could somebody help please? I've just downloaded Tinder - got swiping and now I've got to someone with a blue star next to his name and I haven't swiped him yet-does this mean he has 'superliked' me? If I swipe left will he be told or will it just be like any other no match and he won't get alerted or anything? Thanks - overthinking things probably

You tell her!! Totally right.

So Lois Lane hasn't been on What's App at all since nearly 5pm yesterday. She could well just be one of those that doesn't use online stuff much.

I figured my next plan of attack would be if she hasn't contacted by say 9pm, which is very unlikely, I could drop her a voice message on there to say hello. My Geordie tones might do the trick.

I think after that I'd have done my fair bit of chasing. I almost can't complain that she hasn't messaged because she hasn't been on there. However, if she wanted to message me she would have been on there, etc etc.

I like this one so would like to try more for sure.

Quarter, I believe you can swipe without being informed. I've superliked people recently and they've not matched and I've had nothing to say they didn't match you. They just kinda don't appear in the match section.

Thanks Info

People only get one super like per day so it's a bit of an honour to get one :)

Info, is Lois Lane the surgeon? My friends who are doctors and nurses are often difficult to pin down because of shift work and odd sleep patterns, so it could be that

What QuarterMileAtATime said. Doctors have a very different lifestyle to most people and you should take this into account.

My friends who are doctors can't check their phones at work. At all. They're lucky if they get a toilet break, let alone a chance to eat. And they always work late, so free time is often spent sleeping.

A friend of mine who is a doctor was once 3 hours late meeting me. I wouldn't put up with that sort of behaviour from anyone else. I make allowances for doctors because I know how hard their jobs are and how little in control they are of their time.

I know you are super keen, InfoSec21, but be patient.

Be patient, excellent doctor pun :) :)

I can totally be patient, I'm sure she said she doesn't work weekends. I wouldn't push her in any way, would just say hi :)

The common connection thing on Tinder is freaking me out a bit. Someone just came up who were 2nd connections via 7 people on my Facebook: someone I knew from secondary school, someone from college, someone from uni, someone from my masters (different uni and city), my SIL's BIL, a former work colleague, and my best friend's sister None of these people know each other and all live in different cities. Possibly he's one of these people who have housands of Facebook friends, but still!

I still haven't got Tinder, it wanted access to my friends list.

Can a first time be a good indicator of someone being good in bed or not? Wouldn't it be all awkward and stuff, is that when people should be bringing out all their best tricks?

This summer I went to the wedding of a couple who have been together about 14 years (2 kids). It was a drag wedding- all the men in dresses, all the women in beards (just because ). Imagine a totally pissed- up groom, a vision in blonde wig and long white dress, giving a long, rambling speech to an audience including his wife's parents: "You know.....the first time we had sex was REALLY CRAP!! Luckily it's got better since then...." (Cue frantic shushing from lots of bearded ladies ).

Does anyone swipe right on guys who clearly have pics of their ex ( or current )on the profile? I see so many. Do women do this too? I'd be mortified if a pic of me ended up on my ex's dating profile

*OutToGetYou°, I'm going to see James this summer! I've also seen them the last couple of years at festivals. They're brilliant live.

I spoke to Beardy. He wanted to meet up but I refused.

I don't care if he tells his new GF he's meeting up with me. He's dating her now and I know full well he does not see me as just a friend. I don't care if the two of them are only seeing each other casually and if he were to tell her we were meeting up - it's just not good girl code.

I told him when he finally friendzones me properly, then I'll see him as a friend and not before. He reluctantly agreed. He thinks that will be a while. I knew it.

I hate myself for always doing the right thing.

I don't really get the idea of becoming friends with irons. Do lots of people do this?

I was chatting with someone who I quickly worked out was not suitable (works away for a month at a time and has 3 kids so I decided against it) but we got on well while chatting. I told him I didn't want to get involved with someone in his situation as it wouldn't work for me. He was fine about it.

Since then, he has messaged me a few times. First time I replied in a friendly way but left it there, but then he messaged again and I ignored.

I presume he is home for his month off and looking for a ONS. Am I wrong to assume this? I don't want that.

Even if he just wants to be friends, I'm seeing Mr Web now so it would be weird wouldn't it?

I think if we met as friends, I'd be worried he was expecting more. We met on a dating site after all!

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach We have a really powerful connection; if we can't do lovers, I'd settle for friends. But what I won't settle for is meeting up with him when he's dating someone else exclusively and still not over me. I know how that would end and it's not pretty. It would not be fair to the other woman. It wouldn't.

Sooper I see a lot of women's profiles on Tinder that show them with a guy. Occasionally they will put things like "the guy in the pic is my brother" but most of the time not, which just makes you wonder if its an ex. But then you get some profiles where there is just one photo, which shows a group of women on a night out and you're just supposed to telepathetically know which is the one who owns the profile.

Once Oddly enough, I was going to say no, I don't get the idea of becoming friends with irons. Except I realised that two irons (one POF, one OKC) from when I did OLD 6 years ago did indeed become friends. But I probably wouldn't let that happen again as I already have enough female friends as it is.

I have stayed friends with a few irons but generally I don't think it works, the ones I have stayed in touch with occasionally try to take things thurther which is awkward. I'm a friendly person and I tend to get on with everyone but not everyone can manage to 'just be friends'.

I'm still talking to Mr Beard and trying to arrange a date but I feel we have talked too much and he is slightly OI. Last night he told me his full name 'in case I wanted to have a nose at his Facebook account', of course I had a nose, nothing untoward there but just conforms that I'm not sure if he is my type, he's a bit of a hippy, likes rock music and likes going out on the piss with his friends (his house mates), no problem with that but not really my thing. I think I need to find some more irons to take the focus off of Mr Beard a bit.

POF is dead, I joined a few others but seems to be the same faces everywhere.

Pringle it sounds like you have the right idea! Btw my post wasn't specifically aimed at you, and not judging at all. Just wondering if it's a common thing to do. Should I be considering it? Lol!

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach ShatnersWig I had this conversation with a good friend of mine who dated a lot before she settled down. She agreed with me that if you've ever been in an actual relationship, it's hard and rarely works. However, if you've only been on a few dates, it can work if you both want it to. She's got a few male friends that way and her DH is fine with it.

Beardy is the only iron I've met who I would consider being friends with. Although, I think that's because both of us don't want to close that door forever and if we're ever both single at the same time, who knows? Which is an awful basis for a friendship. I'm one of those women who has tons of male friends, hardly any female friends and most women hate.

Lovemusic33 What is it with Beards and FB? Beardy asked for my surname so he could FB stalk me. I declined.

I think my next iron is going to be a Bumble iron. I've been accumulating lots of Bumble matches, so need to swipe right to a few and get chatting. I think I'm ready to get back in the game.

I've deleted and reinstalled my tinder app. Lots more hotties now so waiting for the matches to roll in..... or probably not. I did match with a guy I met on a night out years and years ago so trying to be brave and send the first message. We already have each other's phone numbers so there's one thing I don't have to tick off

Pof is just rubbish at the minute. I unhid myself and there's not a lot happening. Might have to follow infos lead (I think it was info?) and delete and reinstall that too.

The start of summer always makes me want to meet someone!