Dating Thread 115 - come join us!

[InfoSec21]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.

Bant thanks for the reply. It was just the way he was talking tonight saying he didn't want a serious relationship with anyone and also about his daughter saying he needs to get a proper girlfriend. He was saying stuff like I need time not in a relationship and there is no rush to get involved with anyone but then whenever he doesn't have his little girl he wants to see me. I just felt really friend zoned if that makes sense. I was hurt so badly last year by my ex that I do worry so much about getting hurt again.

Bluegirl it sounds like it ain't broke, so don't try to fix it!

Seriously, if the two of you are happy and honest with each other and most importantly if he behaves well towards you then go with the flow. It sounds like both of you are struggling with not having the words to describe your relationship, but it is people's behaviour that is important. How people act usually reveals how they feel. And from that perspective you seem to have a good thing going

On reflection most of us with kids/significant exes are finding our way pretty blind - what does the right relationship look like in those circumstances when you've already done the marriage/partner/parent thing? Hopefully we get to do our own thing & make up our own rules .

Ok GSM guy visited me again last night. That's 3 times in 24 hrs and no 'like' or message.

blue sounds like you are already in a relationship with him so I don't understand why he doesn't want to label it as one? It could be one of several reasons, maybe he just feels scared and it's too soon for him to admit he's in a relationship, or maybe he doesn't want to be exclusive and wants to be able to walk away at any point?, I think you need to talk to him a bit more and find out what he thinks you are if he doesn't think it's a serious relationship.

I'm going to have a break from OLD today, feeling quite stressed by everything. Mr still living with his wife keeps messaging me saying he loves me, I don't feel the same but I would like to stay friends, sadly I don't think he can be just friends, he's talking about moving out of the family home and seems to think we can then have a relationship, this isn't what I want. POF has gone quite now Mr Busman has gone, I'm still talking to Mr Beard but we didn't talk much last night, by the time he messaged me back I was going to bed so didn't answer.

Quick question. Date 3 with Mr Gym on Saturday and I've discovered it's his birthday on Sunday.
Should I do anything about it? I was going to pay for our night out on Saturday but he's already booked the cinema tickets.
I'm not seeing him on his birthday as he's got family stuff planned.

Situations like this I realise I am clueless about dating.

Date 3 is 'DTD date', isn't it? Tricky re the birthday. If I couldn't think of anything relevant, small a personal to get him, I'd probably get a card.

Certainly text on the day (unless you wake up in the same bed - then just bring him tea :) ).

I agree with LM about Blue - it sounds to me as if he wants to keep his options open, have all the sex/company etc but not commit. That's fine if it's what you both want. But it sounds as if it's not what blue wants.

I think it is time for a 'cards on the table - what does this mean to you - what do we both want' chat. And be prepared for it not to be what you want to hear and for it to be the end. Not that I would do that, I am way too cowardly.

Has anyone tried Happn? I can't decide if it's a good idea or a stalkers dream.

Blue
OutToGetYou has it sussed.

However I would just enjoy the here & now.
Rule 8 says it should be fun.
You appear to be enjoying his company. Perhaps if you can:
relax, enjoy his company have fun & lots of nookie.(bedroom antics)
If this is not your style have
"The Chat"

Hi Blue agree with Lettuce with your 2 options

Pavonia A friend really likes Happn and rates it.

LM33 agree with OuttoGet re card etc.

Lettuce Hope today is a better day and sorry re your friend

Well seeing Mr Giant after all tonight for a date as upped his interest again -he was working a lot for a few days. He can be witty and attentive and then not - so will be interesting what he is like in RL. Definitely worth the meet as have loads in common.

Wont meet other iron for a while. Otherwise dating quiet not going to contact anyone myself for a while. Busy in RL and our school holidays start today.

Hope all dates go well this weekend

but yes Pavonia can see what you mean re stalking. But she says she likes that local and that often there are connections with people she knows so there is often something known about them. Like one guy she was considering going on a date with and I knew him and could tell her a lot about him and that he was fine.

Mumfun thanks. I installed it this week and I have one "crush" so far. I might message him tomorrow.

May there be
Chocolate
Dating by proxy
Real dates aplenty
Sunshine
Picnics
Easter egghunts
Family gatherings
Friend meet-ups
Good health
Loadsa nookie
Fun & frolics
Over the Easter break.

Kicking My Mr Car into touch & the Dumping Ground on Sunday....or later on Monday.

I have very cheekily asked out a boyfriend of 23 years ago - through one of his family members who I had dinner (not planned) with last night.
I did not sleep a wink last night.
Am like a giddy drink teenager today.
Have housework and church to go to for end of term...will from all day.
Dunno what to call boyfriend of 23 years ago....very hot iron in real life 😊
I shall call him mr Sweet.

♡♡♡♡
L soup

....like a giddy drunk teenager

....I will from all day

P.S. I have no idea if mr Sweet will wanna see me again
..even as a mate
We share a hobby together..
So sport & snogging peut-free
L soup

. ..Peut-etre

outto I hadn't realised that about date 3 .
I'll get a card and see how Saturday eve goes with regard to anything else.

Blue I agree with what's been said by others here. You need to have a conversation with him as his comments and indecision are making you unhappy.

...I will GRIN all day

Update
Friend is through surgery.
Thanks for thoughts

No message back from Lois Lane since yesterday afternoon, via What's App. No second guessing though, I know the following information for sure:

1. She'd only given me her number the night before.
2. She replied yesterday lunchtime.
3. She hasn't been online in WA since teatime yesterday.
4. She's a surgeon so could well be called off to something and just unavailable.

But what I also know is that people will always find time to drop a message if they want to. That's without a doubt.

I'll find out whenever she comes back on WA I guess whether she messages me back or not.

Lois Lane sounds cool
She better answer/respond or we (online daters from here)
will send in the heavies.

Have a lovely weekend everyone!
That guy blocked me on POF. Never had that happen before, and still feeling like a bit of a cow!

Hello can I join in please ..my names Louise but I can't remember my password I picked so can't change my name duh...
Online dating is ruining me lately ..
Ok August my first ever online date and it turned into a 4 month relationship till he ghosted me 2 days before Xmas (nice)
I rejoined in January and started talking to someone ..we organised a date,spoke for 2 weeks then he deleted and blocked me ...
Started talking to someone else ,stupidly told him me and some girlfriends had bought steps tickets for December (massive fans when we were 13/14) instantly deleted and blocked me ...
Really because I like steps ..how pathetic ?
You think I'm unsuitable because I know the dance routine to tragedy !!

Sorry user but I couldn't help but laugh at that last part

The rest is so crappy and disappointing for you though. I mean, why do that to someone? If you don't want to be with someone, have the balls to take ownership for that decision and let the person know.

Onwards and upwards!

I love Steps. They're ace :)

Well I know the dance routines to most steps songs but shhhhh..il never get a date again ha ha
The guy I was seeing for 4 months really hurt me,found out he dumped me for someone else too (after Facebook stalking ) think he's split with her too now.
He was lazy ..maybe I should of ran from him.
My motivation for dating is going downhill...I actually posted on here when he canceled our first date ..your probably can't remember but he said he ran over a nail and he couldn't make it ..