Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Slept with someone last night and regret it

254 replies

Emma98 · 18/03/2017 06:56

I'm single and 13 weeks pregnant I work in a pub and have been chatting to one of the regulars for a few weeks. Anyway to cut a long story short after work last night he came back to mine and we ended up sleeping together. When I've woken up this morning he has gone. I text him and haven't had a reply yet. So I'm guessing he was just after one thing and now he has had it he's not interested.

Now I just think I'm stupid for thinking it was anything more serious and totally regret it

OP posts:
BusterGonad · 18/03/2017 07:41

I'm surprised that he'd do a runner considering he's a local at the pub you work in! What a dick head!

BusterGonad · 18/03/2017 07:42

Don't tell your mum unless she's the type to hug you and let you whimper in self pity whilst making you cups of tea and offering cake! Grin

Annesmyth123 · 18/03/2017 07:43

He may still be asleep.

How can it be "anything more serious" - surely it was just, at this point, a one night stand?

SleepingTiger · 18/03/2017 07:45

Assuming he didn't realise you were pregnant but still keeps coming back to the pub.

Think about the fun you could have when you start to show. The panic in his eyes......

BusterGonad · 18/03/2017 07:48

Sleepingtiger I was thinking that but wasn't sure it'll go down well! 😂Grin

Andrewofgg · 18/03/2017 07:48

SleepingTiger Grin but assuming he has a calendar the panic won't last long.

DevelopingDetritus · 18/03/2017 07:51

Bastard.

Annesmyth123 · 18/03/2017 07:52

Why is he a bastard?

SleepingTiger · 18/03/2017 07:52

Well if he is a shit OP may enjoy a bit of revenge. In my experience the average beery bloke would still worry even if protection was used.

Anyway, hope I haven't derailed the thread OP. Look after yourself and remember his behaviour is appalling.

SandyGEE12 · 18/03/2017 07:58

Did you enjoy your night? Try and focus on thinking about a fun night that you had and move on. Try and focus on you now, look after yourself, can you have a nice day appreciating your own company, having a few treats? If he is interested in more he will get in contact. If he doesn't, you are far better off without him and consider it a lucky escape. I had experience of pursuing a relationship someone who wasn't interested in a relationship but we had lots of great sex, but it went on for a while and I ended up getting hurt alot, and making a fool of myself at times. I moved away, started a great relationship and now have a great family. There is now way I would have any of this with the other guy. I now look back and try and remember the great sex, and (and forget the hurt) appreciate that I did move on and that even though I didn't realise it at the time, ended up getting what I wanted from life. I wish I had moved on earlier.

BusterGonad · 18/03/2017 08:00

Come in Andrew I doubt he'd know the exact size of a pregnant ladies tummy to the exact night he slept with her. Some women carry small some big. When I was 28 weeks pregnant I was still wearing my size 12 Topshop skinny jeans...but that's a story for another day!

Annesmyth123 · 18/03/2017 08:00

If I was a bloke, looking for "something more" and I slept with a woman who hadn't told me she was 3 months pregnant (with someone else's child) I'd think she was all kinds of a bastard. And I'd run like fuck and not contact her again. It's a bit duplicitous.

MorrisZapp · 18/03/2017 08:02

Hmm yes that is a bit odd. If it was a one night stand then fair enough but if you're expecting more, it seems a bit dodgy to me.

bloodyfuming9 · 18/03/2017 08:03

You haven't had a reply yet because he's probably still asleep!
Is he definitely single? if he isn't, then it would explain his leaving...

ittooshallpass · 18/03/2017 08:05

Why is his behaviour appalling?

2 consenting adults have sex. He gets up and goes home. OP is posting about a lack of response to a text before most people are even awake on a Saturday morning.

In all honesty, what do you want from this man OP? A relationship? A father-figure for your baby? A bit of fun? Decide what you want and take it from there.

frauleinsallybowles · 18/03/2017 08:05

boy is he in for a shock in the next few months when you starts to show.

Annesmyth123 · 18/03/2017 08:05

And, maybe I'm missing something, but why would any grown adult tell their mother they had a one night stand? I don't get that. I don't understand why you'd tell your mother that at all.

NoLotteryWinYet · 18/03/2017 08:06

creeping out in the night is dickish, contact avoiding behaviour and mannerless, and treating the other person as a disposable commodity.

Annesmyth123 · 18/03/2017 08:07

It's dickish, avoiding behaviour and mannerless to sleep with someone and not tell them you are 3 months pregnant with someone else's child.

DevelopingDetritus · 18/03/2017 08:12

Hopefully he finds another pub!

NoLotteryWinYet · 18/03/2017 08:13

i agree it would have been better to set all expectations clearly upfront! I don't think we should be being unkind to emma though, I don't remember pregnancy as my best time for clear thinking.

DevelopingDetritus · 18/03/2017 08:14

It's dickish, avoiding behaviour and mannerless to sleep with someone and not tell them you are 3 months pregnant with someone else's child. Don't think there was any call for that harshness.

Emma98 · 18/03/2017 08:14

Fell back to sleep for half an hour and come back and not sure where to start with the replies that have come in!

OP posts:
Annesmyth123 · 18/03/2017 08:15

Neither did I think there was any cause for the harshness towards this man.

Thanksforasking · 18/03/2017 08:16

What did you actually want/expect from him?