Brave Babes are boinging into Spring..Join us here!

[dementedma]

We are a bus load of Babes all battling alcohol and trying to resist, reduce and get our lives back under control. Whatever you have to say, we will have heard it before and no-one will judge you. This is a warm, friendly,supportive place with tough love when needed ( slap round the face with a wet squid called Barrie). Join us here.

Oh god book hope everything goes ok, will be thinking about you.
I've got massive health anxiety so am always worried my drinking will cause that but I can't seem to bring myself to stop.

Was af last night thank god, feel so much better today. Not driving the kids to drop offs worrying I'm over the limit was nice. Going to try again tonight which I should manage as dd has her first jabs today so need to keep an eye on her temp. I'm stressing about this mortgage application though so I'm so tempted, saying that I was drinking on Sunday and got to the end of the second bottle and I didn't really even want it but I didn't stop. Does that make sense?

Hope everyone else is ok, here's to a happy sober Tuesday

book I'm sorry to hear about the possible cirrhosis. Perhaps your scan will give better news - fatty liver or alcoholic hepatitis, or something treatable like that? I was so scared myself as my hands started turning yellow, but had an extremely lucky escape I think as my stats were normal (whatever that is). Really hope the further tests bring reassuring news for you.

I had a wobble yesterday - emotionally - but actually didn't want to drink. This is major for me. (The only time I've been tempted at all since leaving detox was when blimmin' Jamie Oliver started waxing lyrical the other day about turning waste bread into Belgian beer. Aaaaaargh. My "poisons" of choice were mainly gin and wine but oh I did used to like a Belgian beer from time to time.

book I'm sorry about your news. I hope you get more answers soon and don't have to wait long for the scan. The big question mark between finding out there's likely a problem and having more concrete information can be the hardest and most frightening time as so much is unknown and the imagination fills in all the blanks. I don't know if you have anyone you feel comfortable talking to irl about this but if you do it can really help to reach out. I had some frightening medical tests done many years back and held off talking to anyone because it made it feel more 'real', but it really did help to let someone know. People don't always know the right thing to say but they can offer comfort and talking can be a good outlet if any dark thoughts are spiralling out of control. And there's always everyone here to talk to as well.

Morning all. Special hello to Mouse (just because haven't seen you for a while - you might know me as Mintyy).

Book, will you go to rehab? I would have thought you qualify. Sorry if that is too direct a question.

Day 7 here. I have a rare treat tonight - one of my oldest and dearest is visiting from Australia and I am going to see her along with my husband and children and mutual friends plus a clutch of various teens.

I might have a drink as I earmarked tonight as my one night "off" the Lent thing, but actually am feeling I probably won't! I'm enjoying the extra energy from not drinking so very much ... we'll see.

Good luck everyone for today .

Book you poor thing, I’m really sorry to hear that. Look after yourself – rest, watch crap telly etc, but be kind to yourself.
Lux how are you feeling now, I hope you’re a little better? I’ve done similar so I know how rough it can be the next day look after yourself, plenty of water and TV.
Mouse hugs and
Theanswer well done on AF yesterday
Flowery it makes perfect sense, it took lots of effort to drink sometimes but still I kept going. Well done on AF yesterday
Bibbity well done
Hello to anyone I’ve missed
Last night was the first night in a while I’ve not taken cocodamol I’ve just got into the habit of taking 3 or 4 before bed to make sure I get a good night (sleep problems) but ran out so I didn’t. Not too bad, I slept, not as well as I would have otherwise but nothing horrendous. Now to make sure I only take painkillers for actual pain . I think I have an addictive personality in some ways – I don’t do anything by halves, it’s all or nothing with me. Spent morning applying for jobs and now going to chill this afternoon.

book, I'm sorry to hear your diagnosis. Hopefully it's not full-blown cirrhosis. The important thing is you recognised it and knew you had to stop. The future will be so much better.

unwise your mum sounds like mine. I'm sorry. Accepting that you cannot change it doesn't make it stop hurting. It's not your job to adjust your mind so that it doesn't bother you, nor is it your job to fix the relationship. There's very little you can do, in my experience, but keep as much distance as possible (physical and emotional) between yourself and your mum. It sucks.

My husband's away working this week so I'm solo parent. Not sure whether that will make me want to drink more or less. Anyway, Day 2 here and have armed myself against the Thursday booze gremlins. No wine in house. Face and hair mask bought. Food in. Bring it on.

I have just returned from the Ultra Sound, and things could be whole lot worse.

Yesterday the Dr seemed convinced that I had cirrosis, but after todays scan, he could not see the signs he was looking for.

I have definitely damaged my liver, but it may not as far as cirrosis, or not as advanced as I was fearing,

Damaged liver is not something most people would sing and dance about, but next to cirrosis, I am so so releived.

My DW has been so supportive, and I confess that I have been a bit snappy to her. I need to give her a big hug.

They will do a CAT SCAN soon to ffurther verify what is going on in my body.

You lot are a bunch of lovely people, thank you so much for your thoughts and wishes, it has meant a lot to me.

Book this sounds a bit more positive. I'm glad you have a supportive DW. Hopefully the damage is reversible, throw everything you can at beating the monster that is drink.
There is usually always someone here to talk to or distract and while we are all at different stages of the journey, we all 'get it'

I feel dreadful, honestly, my tolerance must have really gone down over the last couple of months, I feel really ill

I was talking to my recovering alcoholic friend earlier and she reckons this is a good thing I feel so terrible, a spur to continue AF.

Sorry not to NC everyone, I'm just so tired today. Hope everyone is ok and I'll catch up later when I'm back in the land of the living.

Book i feel really relieved for you. Hopefully if there is any damage it's reversible if you don't drink. I think the question about rehab is a good one. Have you looked into this?

I am not in the UK, so such things are not available.

I am willing to give it a go on my own. This has been a huge shock, and a wake up call for a possible 2nd chance.

Book I'm so glad for you, it must be a massive relief throw everything you can into beating it

Aw book that's great news.

Hope you feel a bit better soon lux. I'm a massive fan of alka seltzer for such occasions. Fixes my dodgy tummy too.

Flora is Thursday your bad day aswell? It's always mine, I don't know how I've managed to stretch my drinking weekend from Thursday now but it's my killer day and I don't need to drive anywhere on Friday mornings.

We're just back from dds jabs. Was brutal but she's fallen asleep now, feel like I really want wine tonight but I think I'll try and give it a miss. I'm grudging the money aswell if I'm honest. Our tumble just broke so will need to replace when we find out about the house. God I hope they call soon

quick check in from work while waiting for conference call to start.
dd 1s mental health still deteriorating. I cracked and called a hypnotherapist/pyscotherapist I know and he was lovely. He has had some success with OCD and fear/anxiety before but he says he cant make it go away/cure her. He can only make it more manageable and for her to feel happier. I'll take that! its a lot of money per session but I will find it from somewhere. She is completely nocturnal now, awake all night, asleep all day, drugged up on ADS, not eating. Its like she's dying in front of me...she has taken her mattress off her bed and sleeps on it on the floor, always with one particular soft toy for comfort. She is 26 and has no life.
Sorry to derail, just had to let that out. Off to wipe eyes before conf call

Oh ma that sounds awful. What medication is she on if you don't mind me asking. I was quite like that in my early 20s before I met dh for a bit. The mess I'm on now are a world away from what I was put on then but they definitely work better. Can you opt in for listening therapy at the docs where you are? I had to push for it but I definitely needed it.
I'm maybe a bit different cause I was working and had to push myself to get to work everyday but it's honestly awful. Is she working at the moment? Can you gently push her to some part time work that will get her out?
I found staying in made my symptoms worse. If she needs to chat at all you can pm me, I'm close to her age and if that would help at all just let me know. It must be awful for you but what you're willing to do is amazing. I left home at 18 for uni and my mum was and still is less than helpful with things like this
Hope things get better

Book I'm so pleased it's not as severe as you feared.

Thanks flowery she's on a high dose of Sertraline. Shes not working and won't really talk to me. But she has been at my mother's today helping with some painting so that's good. She's brilliant at crafts and making things so am trying to encourage that.

Balls sertralines the one I'm on aswell, I had another one when I was younger can't mind the name but the difference in how it worked was night and day.

That's great though, I still struggle with focusing on a project until things are just so (was diagnosed with OCD/anxiety and depression) hope she gets on ok, but the offers always there.
You're doing amazing coping with all that, I hope I'm as good as that when the kids are grown

You do have some much to cope with ma must be so hard.
And you flowery the mind is still such a mystery compared to physical ailments.

I feel really dreadful still so going to bed now, need sleep.

Hope everyone else is OK.

book that sounds more positive, glad you are getting things sorted.

flowery hope dd is ok after her jabs, bless her. Hope you hear about the house soon- it's so stressful isn't it!

ma poor dd. Has she been offered anything like CBT via the GP at all?

lux hope you and your back are feeling a bit better this evening!

made hope you're ok. Be careful with the cocodamol- taking 3-4 in one go is far too much paracetamol in one dose if your taking them together.

I'm still af tonight, would absolutely love some wine though. Dentist tomorrow morning been looking at 'surgical wisdom tooth extraction' videos on YouTube and wishing I'd gone for the option of sedation. Actually really quite scared, pathetically.

Ran 14 miles this afternoon- was meant to be 15 but literally couldn't go any further. Absolutely no idea how I'm meant to add another 12 onto that! If I have any chance at all of doing it I will need to seriously sort out my lifestyle over the next few weeks- it's clearly not possible to run a marathon on a diet of bananas, toast, wine and Marlborough lights

Going to take a sleeping tablet in a minute otherwise I will definitely be awake all night. Hope all ok

Ma oh poor dd, and poor you too

Hope you have a better night Lux

Elba good luck for the dentist tomorrow, I hope it goes ok and is over quickly Have a good night’s sleep

I’m ok, going to go for another co-codamol free night again tonight I’m at the refuge tomorrow helping out with an event and there’ll be papers about can’t wait!

Just checking into the new thread and saying hello to all.

Dave x

Thanks all. Referrals on NhS take forever. Just got to keep at it.

Morning all.

I'm on day three, but I had a terrible week, drinking a bottle or bottle and a half a night. No good reason other than that I am tired beyond belief with work. I really need to get my head together.

Hello to all of the new Babes, Ma so sorry to hear about DD {{{{t'interbosies }}}} to you all.

Stay strong today.

Mad day at work yesterday. Marriage guidance councillor session and then the inevitable wine when we got home. Although, was only half a bottle and I did resist opening another bottle- had a camomile tea instead.

But still feel like poop this morning. Another early start at work.

Am going to try to be AF tonight.

Morning All

Ma I'm so sorry to hear about your DD1. I've got something similar going on with my DD1 (nearly 18) she dropped out of college (manage to do 1st year AS's, got Ds with no work which was pretty good going) We had to wait for 18 months for referal to CAHMS in the meantime I've been paying for her to see private couciller (£45 per week for 50 mins) We finally get her appointment at CAHMS and the lady announces that she's leaving at the end of March So out of the 6 sessions that they make available DDs only been to one out of four so far. Doc won't give her ADS until she's 18 (beginning of May) and she misses her other counciller (who I can't really afford but she's going back to) so I need to go back to Doc to get her lack of attendance to CAHMs on record so that she's still referred to adult services when she's 18 - it's been a nightmare.
Like your DD1, mine is currently completely nocternal, she's not eating properly and not bathing for days. She's been doing a creative writing course one evening a week (leisure class - £88 per term) she is enjoying that, but decided she didn't want to go last night It is so difficult when us Mums have to go out to work all day when we want to support our DDs I hope you find a way forward and she gets the support that she needs. It's bloody tough.