Brave Babes are boinging into Spring..Join us here!

[dementedma]

We are a bus load of Babes all battling alcohol and trying to resist, reduce and get our lives back under control. Whatever you have to say, we will have heard it before and no-one will judge you. This is a warm, friendly,supportive place with tough love when needed ( slap round the face with a wet squid called Barrie). Join us here.

Typos due to fat fingers and small phone plus aging eyesight .....

Morning all,

Pedro welcome aboard, Ma is right, this is a very friendly and supportive thread, by making your first post you are amongst friends
I get the conflict of drinking too much and wanting/not wanting to stop - I was Lux, the generous hostess who could always offer a drink and good food, the 'fun' party guest, the one who made the dinner party interesting with my views' except no, actually I was becoming a bore, rarely had those guests to look after and was frightening my beloved DD with my drunken (I thought justified) impatience and snapping.
I drank whole lagoons of wine, simply rivers of the stuff. I feel so much better now for stopping it. If you've been reading you will know I haven't quit booze completely, but the odd beer here and there is fine for me - it's wine, for so many of us here it's bloody, bloody wine.

Better welcome to you too, yes, I felt ashamed about my drinking once I'd faced up to it. Writing here is enormously helpful. You've taken the first huge step and things can only get better, there may be wobbles along the way but you can do this if you want to I have a teenager too, and she was all too aware of my drinking.

Bus is busy right now hey? I hope I haven't left any new posters out, I will catch up after I've had a couple of coffees.

Well, I think admitting that is definitely the first step.

Yes!

Oddly enough i can stop at 1 or 2 beers.
With wine lately ive been sneeking a second bottle too and hiding what i havent drunk for the next day
WHY IS THAT?

This is going to be hard as DH absolutely refuses not to drink each night. That is HIS choice though - i dont need to adopt the same problem. I need to be the role model for the teenager in the house - and also for myself.

In my waking hours last night i finally allowed myself to list my issues (in my head) - putting my baggage all together and naming each one has made me realise how much stuff ive swept under the carpet and not allowed myself to process. I guess we all have stuff dont we? Its how we process it that makes all the difference.

Mr Lux is also carrying on drinking. It's like looking in a mirror now tbh (and it's no ta pretty sight!)

Really important to keep hydrated in my view, and try some interesting drinks too, this is a good time to explore all the flavoured waters and cordials available. It really doesn't have to be cola or orange juice.

Hi, I've been following this for a while. What do you do to keep busy. I find that if I can last until 8pm I don't want any wine but if I have a glass as soon as I come in I want more. And more. And more.

Hi guys!

Aye ma I'm ok today just worked myself into a state the past couple of days. Me and baba are at the new house making bacon rolls for dhs friends who are helping. Sticking to magners today cause I know I can stop at a couple. Wine when I'm stressed and haven't been eating was a stupid plan

Hi flowerey big day today, fancy a bacon roll now!

user distraction is vital to get past the danger zone, do anything really, paint your nails, clean out the fridge, read the paper. Breaking your responses helps a lot and does keeping hydrated.

I need to break the routine. Yesterday I had a glass of wine about 2pm and by 8pm is polished off 2 bottles. I feel awful this morning a and missed my fitness class. I was home alone as my family had gone to visit relatives overnight. What a waste of previous alone time. I think I'll stick around and see what tips you all mention :)

Do stick around user and read back if you get the time, I doubt many of haven't done 2 bottles on a regular basis or gone to open a 3rd even.
Yes , it is a waste of time, I have to say I am relishing the extra sober hours now and my skin thanks me too, I was blotchy, puffy and old before my time. My bank balance also thanks me!

www.seedlipdrinks.com/ This looks interesting as an alternative but it's very expensive!

I've got this! It is a good alternative and I managed 4 nights AF before getting back on the wine. That might be tonight's option. I forget I had it in.

Does it taste nice? I'm going to get the garden one I think.

Hello pedro, user and better, you won't find a safer bus to travel on, x

Hey flowery hope today goes well, like lux I could really go a bacon roll now! Moving is an arse, bless you. xx

user wow, they look fancy, might give them a bash.

The hairy alarm clock woke me at 5.30. We've been to the river. Today I sang Living by Bakermat. Saw a kingfisher, just a flash of blue across the river. I went to bed earlyish, I didn't drink. I won't be drinking today, scared myself again yesterday at just how low I felt.

So today Bakermat trumped Judy Garland.

Stuck in a rut you can't get out
There's too much causing you doubt
No cash, no job, no self-esteem
Me I'm takin' and I'm givin'

If you got the gift you should use it
Opportunity, don't want to lose it
Climb over the walls, break down all the doors
When your future calls

Don't let nothing hold you down
Nothing hold you down, down
Don't let nothing hold you down
Nothing hold you down, down

Just surviving and living
Just surviving and living
Just surviving and

Stuck in a rut you can't get out
There's too much causing you doubt
No cash, no job, no self-esteem
Me I'm takin' and I'm givin'

They may wreck your dreams if you let them
Keep them goals in sight, don't forget them
Keep your head up high, yes the future's bright
Keep your head up high

Don't let nothing hold you down
Nothing hold you down, down
Don't let nothing hold you down
Nothing hold you down, down

Just surviving and living
Just surviving and living
Just surviving and
Just surviving and

That's an appropriate song right now dubh

How does anyone join the Bus when so many of you are friends?

Pedro I am quite new (joined the beginning of February). There are lots of folk who have been here a while, hence the chit chat, but you will find everyone is very friendly and welcoming. It's not hard to join in, I think you will find it OK.

Come and chat :)

And on the subject of the Bus, I have to say I always imagine it like one of the city centre open top hop-on, hop-off buses. So we are not all on it at the same time, but sooner or later we turn up.
And we take turns with the commentary/pointing out features of interest!

Well put Grumpy

I am new to the bus too Pedro xx

Just watching DH crack open a beer to go with his lunch - it would never occur to me to do this (would rather a cuppa). My problem with drink lurks in the dark hours and tends to grab me unawares .... bloody wine!
Im going to spend tonight really thinking what my evening trigger is.

Same here better

I try not to drink during the day as then I fool myself it 'doesn't really count'. I also end up thinking 'fuck it, might as well' much earlier in the evening than I would otherwise. My trigger is def dinner. Feeling better today after only a small glass last night. Must be hard watching others at lunchtime. Stay strong!

Afternoon dear babes

Welcome newbies! I am quite a newbie atm (but have been hopping on and off the bus for years).

I find it difficult to write long posts, so selfishly very rarely name check everyone (although I do read every single word that has been written). But this does not mean I am not interested in you or what you are saying. We all learn from each other on the battle bus.

I tend to just respond to one or two posts at a time but I don't "know" anyone hear at all, although I recognise some names from my previous journeys .

Well, babes, I've done it. I gave up for Lent with the honorable exception of having a couple of glasses of prosecco when one of my very best friends was visiting from Australia. Obviously I only see her about once every 5 years so I would have felt embarrassed and churlish not to raise a glass or two with her.

So, 45 days af in the last 46. It feels great!

I am going back to drinking but am going to be very very strict with myself about wine. I'm going to say 1 bottle per week, and see how we go.

I find deciding early in the day that you are not going to drink - say when you have your first cup of tea in the morning - and making that announcement is a great incentive.

If you get a craving (and honestly I've had plenty of days recently where I have not had a craving) do absolutely anything necessary to ride it out until it passes that could include - go out in the car, fill your face with very chewy sweets like Mintoes, lock yourself in the bathroom, post on this thread, order a takeaway if cooking makes you desperate to drink, tell your dp or best friend how hard you are finding it, water your plants, sort out your knicker drawer, go to bed and/or in desperate moment my personal favourite recommendation I have ever seen on here ... bite on a pillow!

When you are starting out, you must have alternatives to wine lined up (fill your fridge with them) and you must have a plan for what you are going to do instead of opening that bottle. Ok?

Much love to every babe xxxx

Bloody well done bibbity, I raise my glass of pink lemonade to you and I'm shoogling the pompoms for all they are worth.

I'm going to take the Terrorist out for another stroll between the showers. It's quite gusty here but it's not a bad day.

Tonight bibbity I will tackle the pyjama mountain. If Marie Kondo's folding is up to the job. I am going to have to cull the pile. It's obscene. When she's been for her last big walk it's straight into jammies for me, make up off and slippers on. Then I am going to streamline my make up bag.

I've decided I'm going to attempt a two weeker. I need a clear head to deal with work. My sister wants me to take a year out, to get myself sorted physically and mentally. Meds apparently take a few months before I'll notice a difference. Depression is common with this condition. Much as it's seriously tempting, I love my job. I'm not the best nurse in the world, some are proper fancy specialists, but I do it because I do care.

I'm away down to M&S after I walk the bairn to stock up on juice. Fill the fridge with lovely stuff to drink.

I'm on duty next weekend so there's a fair chance I will manage to do it.

grumpy I love that thought!! I fancy sitting at the top and letting the wind blow through my hair.

We were all new to the bus once, as soon as you take a seat you are a friend. It's a lifetime ticket. Post lots, post happy, post sad, post scunnered. The good, the bad, the meh. Be selfish, be generous, be short and sweet, be Barried.

There may or may not be green opal fruits hidden about this bus. There are duvets, tea urns, cheese. Hide under a duvet on the back seat or sit up front and peep the horn. There are no rules, only acceptance. You are with people who know you. And you know us. xx

grumpy is right, it's not hard to join in. I waffle on when I'm feart, as I was when I first boarded this marvellous vehicle.

You will find nothing but love and support. The odd kick up the arse. But it's done with love. xx