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Original poster

What kind of men use prostitutes?

999 replies

Snugglepalace · 08/02/2017 09:51

Dh has an outside job which involves spending time on various roads within towns and villages.
A couple of weeks ago he was working on a street in our local town. An everyday street with semi detached homes.
After a day or so Dh and his work colleagues noticed one particular house had a lot of 'visitors'. All the visitors were well dressed men arriving in nice cars. It averaged around 4 men per hour!
At lunchtime a car pulled up (the driver had pizzas) and the door was opened,there was an older woman in the hallway and several younger looking women loitering in the hallway also.

Dh and workmates are convinced it was a brothel. Over the weeks that they were working there they would glare at the men going in and said some of them looked very embarrassed once they realised they had been noticed, one even parked in a nearby supermarket and tried to get in the back way.
I know these things go on but what got me was the thought that surely, several, if not most of these men must have (oblivious?!) partners etc.

OP posts:

Craft1905 · 03/12/2018 09:14

Consent isn't something that can be purchased.

Meaningless platitude alert!

Utter rubbish in any case. Consent is purchased constantly, in a range of scenarios. People aren't doing millions of unpleasant jobs for fun. They consent in exchange for money.

Stop taking in trendy soundbites you heard on the telly and try thinking stuff thru.

AssassinatedBeauty · 03/12/2018 09:24

Consent isn't the same as engaging in a financial transaction or agreeing to work for appropriate compensation. Prostitution isn't another "unpleasant job".

ChestOfFields · 03/12/2018 09:39

Haven't rtft, but in my case he was the kind of guy who ate a dog food pie the day after telling me all about it..

Craft1905 · 03/12/2018 09:51

Prostitution isn't another "unpleasant job".

It is for most, although within the wide range of women (and men) who engage in it, no doubt a few of them quite enjoy it.

AssassinatedBeauty · 03/12/2018 09:56

It's not a job, it's not employment. It isn't an occupation. Clearly men who use prostitutes like to think that, and often make spurious comparisons.

Craft1905 · 03/12/2018 10:51

It's not a job, it's not employment. It isn't an occupation.

Repeating the same ridiculous mantra over and over does not make it true. It is all of those things for the majority of those who do it. And if it was treated as such in law, they would be a damn sight better protected.

Bluerussian · 03/12/2018 11:50

The people I know who were prostitutes considered it to be a job. They earned quite a lot and were taken to nice restaurants, etc. Always had enough to buy what they wanted, wear nice clothes etc. They considered it better than being constantly hard up.

I don't think they had great sexual pleasure from their encounters - didn't expect it from a commercial encounter, but were quite happy to do it, there was a certain excitement/cerebral pleasure in having men appreciate them and some of the men were very nice.

Of course it's a different world to that of girls who are pushed into prostitution. That must be quite soul destroying.

Didn't last forever, they eventually gave up and settled down happily with husbands, houses and kids.

Treesthemovie · 03/12/2018 16:36

Let’s face it, it doesn’t matter whether some prostitutes love having sex with anyone who is willing to pay them for it. There is something wrong with a person who is comfortable with having sex with another person who might be hating the whole thing. How could you enjoy sex knowing the other person is completely unattracted and is faking the whole thing?

AssassinatedBeauty · 03/12/2018 17:21

What makes it true that prostitution is not a job is the fact that it cannot ever be treated as other jobs are, and the men that use women to buy sex don't want this to be the case.

Craft1905 · 03/12/2018 21:17

What makes it true that prostitution is not a job is the fact that it cannot ever be treated as other jobs are

Again, a ridiculous assertion without a scrap of evidence in order to churn out the same boring and untrue mantra.

There's only one reason it's not a job like other jobs, because much of the stuff around it is illegal. Remove that and it becomes a job like other jobs. With health and safety regs, workplace pensions, NI contributions, paid holidays and everything else we all take for granted but seem to want to deny these workers out of some ludicrous adherence to outdated dogma.

You think you're defending women, but in reality you are doing the exact opposite.

Craft1905 · 03/12/2018 21:19

and the men that use women to buy sex don't want this to be the case.

Along with the women who sell sex. Don't overlook them. They don't want it to be the case either.

AssassinatedBeauty · 03/12/2018 21:50

What is boring is the continual defence of men who want to buy sex.

It is not possible to make prostitution, in the way that men want to use women, acceptable as a typical job. It is ridiculous that anyone could seriously suggest it, that health and safety could be addressed. The idea that it could or should be something that is suggested to girls as a career or advertised in a government job centre is ridiculous. A society where buying sex from women is treated like this is not one that I ever want to live in or have my children grow up in, or be part of. So I'm not going to shut up about it.

FamousPJ · 03/12/2018 22:07

Comparing a drug to the use of somebody else's body isn't a equal comparison. I read that. I thought bollocks.

I didn't make a comparison between those two. I was talking about the principle of consent on condition of payment. We are perfectly happy to accept consent on condition of payment in every other aspect of life, so why are the goal posts suddenly moved when it comes to sex work?

Regardless though... I actually would argue that giving someone a novel drug in a clinical trial IS using their body.

I know of plenty of single people who go to swingers clubs. All different looks and personalities. Which makes your statement bullshit. Again.

So are you going to PM me with contact details? I wasn't being snarky or funny, I am genuinely asking you to provide me for contact details for swingers clubs across the UK.

Because you are entitled. Yes it does mean what I think it does.

Entitled;
"believing oneself to be inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment."

So it doesn't mean what you think it means.

FamousPJ · 03/12/2018 22:09

It is ridiculous that anyone could seriously suggest it, that health and safety could be addressed.

As I have already mentioned, sex work is already far safer than many jobs, and it's unquestionably safer than my job.

A society where buying sex from women is treated like this is not one that I ever want to live in or have my children grow up in, or be part of. So I'm not going to shut up about it.

How about a society in which your children are free to make that choice?

Craft1905 · 04/12/2018 09:10

It is ridiculous that anyone could seriously suggest it, that health and safety could be addressed.

Seriously?? You don't think it's possible that steps could be taken to make the lives of prostitutes safer? That's just a plain refusal to accept facts.

ElonMask · 04/12/2018 09:31

The answer is the kind of men who do not see sex as a consensual mutually enjoyable act. Paying someone for it is an admission they won't enjoy it and therfore they have to be compensated for it. Have a wank ? Oh but it's not the same....they prefer touching someone intimately in a way that person does not enjoy.

FamousPJ · 04/12/2018 22:57

The answer is the kind of men who do not see sex as a consensual mutually enjoyable act.

Well I do, so that proves your statement is categorically incorrect.

Have a wank ? Oh but it's not the same....they prefer touching someone intimately in a way that person does not enjoy.

Do you not prefer being intimate with someone else instead of masturbating? With masturbation, you're missing the woman's soft skin tone, her breath, and the warmth of her body... masturbation isn't the same.

Treesthemovie · 05/12/2018 01:11

Famouspj - I’d choose a wank any day over shagging a prostitute. How embarrassing - having sex with someone who’s only doing it for the money.
Feeling someone’s breath etc means fuckall when they'd rather not be touching you at all.

jessstan2 · 05/12/2018 01:16

There's a programme on 5*+1 right now about the 'Sex Business', it doesn't look all that wonderful and I don't know if I will stay up and watch but I thought maybe others would find it interesting. I was flicking through the channels when I came across it.

Cheers.

LadyPasserine · 05/12/2018 06:46

If consent can be purchased then what are pimps for?

ElonMask · 05/12/2018 07:53

Well, here's a little too for you, if you have to pay someone to do something, that means they don't do it out of enjoyment. If a woman actually found sex with you enjoyable, then you wouldn't have to pay her. You're deluded.

I would prefer masturbating to bring intimate with someone who did not enjoy being intimate with me. But then, I have some self respect.

jophie80 · 05/12/2018 08:34

the men who go regularly are normal people, but the one thing no one talks about is what they do with the prostitutes and lets be honest many female prostitutes say they are regularly raped by their paying clients, and so I think a man frustrated with his wife, either sexually or emotionally or both visits a prostitute to have that 1 hour where they get to tell the woman what to do (and she doesn't talk back), they do this before they have to go to their home life where they have to compromise with their wife. So the reasons I feel are complex, as I know many young men who tell their male friends about frequent visits to prostitutes, because lets be honest dating isn't easy and many men don't have the charisma nor the talent to date multiple women in a year and have happy sex lives with said women

Craft1905 · 05/12/2018 09:39

If consent can be purchased then what are pimps for?

Much like celebs and others have agents. Ostensibly, offering some kind of protection and revenue stream in return for a cut of earnings. They thrive in prostitution because of the illegality of the trade. Make it legal and you limit their opportunities.

LadyPasserine · 05/12/2018 10:01

Pimps would be delighted to think of themselves as agents.

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