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Original poster

Ive made a mistake

179 replies

Bigfluffybear · 03/02/2017 21:31

Years ago i had an affair with a married man. He recently got in touch again to meet but i decided against it. Today he turned up at my workplace and we ended up going home after work and had sex. He left about 8pm. Ive made a mistake

OP posts:
SparklyMagpie · 04/02/2017 16:52

AnyFuck - I have always wondered this.
Especially Jeremy Kyle.I'm not very confident but I know im not bad looking, but I have trouble finding one bloke let alone when these people have up to 4 people on the go Grin ok I have a toddler but fuck me, where do they get the time?!

SparklyMagpie · 04/02/2017 16:52

Apologies AnyFucker not AnyFuck Grin

AnyFucker · 04/02/2017 16:56

I will answer to most things Smile

MsGameandWatch · 04/02/2017 17:04

It's not "cheating" the relationship hasn't been specified or labelled yet.

This is a non problem. The fact that you're posting as though it is says to me that you're a massive drama queen and/or that your developing relationship with the new bloke is galloping along unhealthily quickly if you feel that this is some huge betrayal two weeks in.

SparklyMagpie · 04/02/2017 17:10
Grin
Chinnygirl · 04/02/2017 17:15

If you are serious then block the ex his number, delete him off facebook, never speak to him again and don't be so stupid to sleep with someone while you don't feel available.

SheFeedsYouTeaAndOranges · 04/02/2017 17:18

I've always wondered it too. But then it is, apparently, true that many men do adopt a "any hole's a goal" approach. I guess if you're willing to be the hole...

Sugarpiehoneyeye · 04/02/2017 17:26

FluffyBear, please do yourself a favour, and keep your pants on.
You present yourself as desperate.
If you want an adult relationship, you need to act like one.
I unfortunately, don't hold out much hope.

SparklyMagpie · 04/02/2017 17:51

OP could be wrong here ( but I actually doubt it) - you've been seeing the new guy and been in contact and shagged your ex, is it you like the attention of 2 men?

I can bet you my house, everything your ex doesn't give a shit and you've proved how easy he can get you running by sleeping with him the other night. So he's not going to go away and let's be honest, you arnt going to block him, you'll agree to "lunch" and before you know it, it's back round to yours for another shag and the cycle continues... can I ask, as your son hasn't a father on the scene, where is he when you're doing this? As if he caught you with ex, that's another issue you're going to have

Original poster
Bigfluffybear · 04/02/2017 18:00

I used condoms with both men. My son is staying at my brothers this weekend. I am allowed to have some time off from being a mum. I'm not a jeremy Kyle type or a drama queen thanks

OP posts:
ShatnersWig · 04/02/2017 18:07

Not a drama queen??? Have you read your own threads (this and previous ones)? They're like letters to a tabloid agony aunt (and I believe most of those are fictional).

AnyFucker · 04/02/2017 18:18

That's a matter of opinion, love

Original poster
Bigfluffybear · 04/02/2017 18:22

Think what you like

OP posts:
BingoBingoBingoBango · 04/02/2017 18:23

Your a complete drama queen. You have no idea who your son's father is and have been pretending it's a friend, you've been shagging a married man and now have accidentally slept with him again whilst having started seeing someone else who you apparently seem to like.

You choose to do this! Take some responsibility!

Costacoffeeplease · 04/02/2017 18:25

Crack on then

SparklyMagpie · 04/02/2017 18:38

No that wasn't what I meant, where was your son when you brought your ex back the other night? And when does your " friend" arrive so you can tell your child the truth? Because having all this going on missing out the bigger picture is a bit shit wouldn't you say?

SparklyMagpie · 04/02/2017 18:40

Maybe I'm the drama queen because I prioritise my son, and wouldn't be shagging about with 2 different men when I should be aware of how my child's future could be fucked up...just saying

EverythingEverywhere1234 · 04/02/2017 18:42

Not a drama queen 😂 Oh dear OP, we all told you this would happen didn't we? If I thought you might listen, I'd tell you to block your ex... but you won't. Good luck.

RacoonBandit · 04/02/2017 18:47

Your judgenent seems off OP.

Its like you have reverted back to your immature 20 somithing self because of this man.
You said in your last thread that in the last 10 years you have a successfull career, have matured and regret the choices your younger self made. Yet here you are letting this man use you for sex just like he did before.

This will never go anywhere and you are living in a mills & boon novel if you think it will.

Sugarpiehoneyeye · 04/02/2017 18:57

If you weren't a drama queen, you would have kept this shit to yourself.

ddssdd · 04/02/2017 19:20

If this post is even real, op, why did you do it. Was it for kicks, ego, drama?

FWIW, I used to behave like you when I was younger (not the affair but, just 'juggling' men). I realise that I did it because I was lonely & so I, unwittingly, fed off the drama. I'm not saying this is you, but it was certainly me.

Violetcharlotte · 04/02/2017 19:44

Fluffybear you're getting a hard time on this thread, I can see why people are saying what they're saying, but I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt.

I used to be a bit like you, being a single Mum's not easy, is it? It can be pretty lonely, especially when everyone around you seems to be playing happy families. When you're lonely and your self esteem is at rock bottom, it's easy to latch on to anyone who pays you a bit of attention and makes you feel special. I get that. However, now I'm older and wiser I can see how men go for
women who are 'easy targets' . They're not interested in a relationship with you, they're just after a shag. In the long run this will just make you feel even worse.

I really think you need to take a long, hard look in the mirror and start taking responsibility for your own actions (I know - ouch!) Maybe get some counselling to help you build your self esteem. But you really need to get to a place where you're happy in your own skin and not getting in these situations x

RacoonBandit · 04/02/2017 19:53

OP isnt lonely Hmm she has a new guy.

Also she didnt "get in to this situation" she allowed it to happen. She made a choice.

OP could not say enough on her last thread how successful she was and how much she regreted her past and was a different more mature person.

Benefit of the doubt is one thing....however you seem to have ignored most of the back story and the OP.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 04/02/2017 19:57

Yes you made a mistake, but. There's nothing you can do about it now. Its in the past and you can dwell on it until the cows come home. You can't unshag him, and. It must have been what you wanted at the time.

Original poster
Bigfluffybear · 04/02/2017 20:00

Magpie I've answered my son is staying with his uncle for the weekend. If you're asking do i introduce him to men then the answer is definitely not. I don't know who my sons father is and I think it's clear I'm not proud of that so it's a low blow to make.violet thanks for being understanding. I've ignored all texts and calls from my ex and I'm meeting the new guy tonight I won't be telling him what happened as you guys are right it's in it's early stages.

OP posts: