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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

2017 - following on from my bolt out the blue

999 replies

aleC4 · 01/01/2017 21:19

So here is my new thread as promised. I have found it so therapeutic writing on here and have received some great advice and support.
Here's to grabbing 2017 by the horns and making it my year.
(With maybe a few wobbles along the way!)
I can't work out how to link to my old thread on my phone!

OP posts:
Original poster
aleC4 · 05/09/2018 22:10

I'm knackered!
Three days in and I need another break!
I will be glad when my own kids are back, the routine still doesn't feel quite right.
A will is something to do in my 'as soon as' list!
I am waiting until the divorce is all done so it is simpler to do.
Still no word on the divorce or any related expenses. I guess these things take time.

OP posts:
Original poster
aleC4 · 08/09/2018 09:34

I made it to the end of the first week and have had a nice lie in this morning.
Dd had her first day at secondary yesterday and she enjoyed it. She's made a few tentative new friends already so that's good. She is good at making friends which is a good job as she said she's not with any of her old friends in any of her lesson except one!
Ds will go back on Monday thank goodness, it has been a kind summer break for him and he's bored now.

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kaitlinktm · 08/09/2018 11:44

I am always glad when the first week is over (after any holiday) - the first week seems such a shock to the system.

Hope the divorce proceeds smoothly.

Original poster
aleC4 · 09/09/2018 22:17

Thanks Kaitlin, no sign of any divorce papers yet...
The weekend has passed smoothly thank goodness, I didn't want the dc having any stress this weekend before school tomorrow.
Ex took them to a theme park today with the witch - he can't afford school uniform but can afford what must have been at least £200 for a day out.

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flowerpot1000000 · 09/09/2018 22:57

Theme parks are crazy money! Did the kids enjoy it

kaitlinktm · 10/09/2018 11:12

It's what being a Disney Dad is all about - he has been such a cliché throughout hasn't he?

Original poster
aleC4 · 14/09/2018 06:27

They did enjoy it yes but I can't help thinking the money could have been better dorky elsewhere.....
Still no sign of the divorce paperwork but don't faint - he paid £6 this week for ds to go on a school trip!
Only because they were at his house. Ds was desperate to go and needed the letter returning the next day! Nice timing, let's hope all trip letters come on a Tuesday!! 😂
Ex has now decided he can no longer do ds's hobby on a weeknight as it is too far now. Suits me fine as it's round the corner and I have lots of friends there to meet up with. No one talks to him when he goes.
In other news I have started couch to 5k. I have only done 2 tubs and this morning my legs are knackered!

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Original poster
aleC4 · 15/09/2018 14:36

I have started C25k this week and just completed week 1 run 3!
This is a major achievement for me. I am overweight and shamefully unfit.
I have joined a beginners group with some friends. We run on a Tuesday then gave the two other runs to do for homework.

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Underthefur · 15/09/2018 23:21

Well done ale I am in similar shape and have just completed week 2, never would have thought it possible!

It's great you're doing something for you at long last x

Original poster
aleC4 · 18/09/2018 06:25

I'm starting Week 2 tonight and I'm a little nervous. I seem to have sustained some kind of shoulder/neck injury - how on earth do you do that running!

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Startoftheyear2018 · 18/09/2018 18:38

Very easily! Make sure you do some exercises with your core. Running is great but you'll feel better if you can also do some stretching like Pilates or yoga.

Wildheartsease · 20/09/2018 20:46

Well done!

Yoga is a useful complement to this. It does help smooth out pulls and it strengthens muscles you never knew that you had.

Original poster
aleC4 · 22/09/2018 14:41

My sister has sent me a link to a quick yoga workout in you tube so I'm going to give that a go.
Just done my last run of week 2 and even added a couple of e tea minutes running on the end. I am feeling good about it at the mo and determined to succeed.
In other news, no nightmares to report from ex but no divorce papers either....

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CitySnicker · 22/09/2018 16:16

‘30 days of yoga’ on YouTube is fab. Workouts from 12mins to 40mins.

flowerpot1000000 · 22/09/2018 20:18

Still no papers wonder what thats about OP surely the inital paperwork would be ready by now, hope there's no surprises

Original poster
aleC4 · 22/09/2018 21:44

I am hoping so too flowerpot!
I had assumed he would be using some sort of online quickiedivorce.com due to the cost.
I am pretty sure I am right on this.
I think (I hope) he is just being his usual crappy disorganised self.
If it is not to my agreement I will be signing nothing, that's for sure!

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TheLastNigel · 23/09/2018 10:53

Good stuff! I joined a gym three weeks ago then promptly developed a chest infection which I'm still in bed with! Not the ideal start Confused

Original poster
aleC4 · 23/09/2018 11:26

Oh no Nigel, sorry to hear that.
At least the thought was there 😂
Ex and I are currently having a text row over Christmas arrangements while he is at a hobby with ds. I am desperately hoping he doesn't take it out on ds after he finishes and on the way home. I would like to think he is better than that but I suspect not.....

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flowerpot1000000 · 23/09/2018 12:49

What is he proropsing OP, perhaps the children should decide what they want to do

TheLastNigel · 23/09/2018 20:20

Oh god-I also need to start the Christmas negotiations soon. I can't muster the energy.

Original poster
aleC4 · 24/09/2018 18:26

I had put it off because I knew it would cause arguments but he brought it up first.

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Apileofballyhoo · 24/09/2018 20:43

Hope it went ok, AleC.

Wildheartsease · 25/09/2018 12:04

Surely the children get to choose? They are old enough to have a say in this matter.

CreativeMumma · 25/09/2018 12:52

Ive just read both threads this morning and i just wanted to say i think you are bloody brilliant and doing an amazing job and a great role model to your DC's.
Your ex is a knob.

Original poster
aleC4 · 30/09/2018 07:59

Things have settled down now a week on from the Christmas argument.
Heard nothing from him all week and the kids two overnights this week seem to have passed without upset.
Still no sign of the elusive divorce papers, god knows what's going on there.

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