Thank you StopLaughingDrRoss.
And as for your siblings - they're not having to deal with the anxiety and upset that each contact brings. It is so easy to say 'keep things civil' when they don't experience that gut wrenching feeling when your phone tells you there's a text waiting. They don't deal with the fallout for your gorgeous DC when he once again, fucks them around. I can see it's coming from a place of love but unless you've been there, there is no way to know how a short text about dates can potentially generate a huge shit storm.
It's so, so true, they are amazing and supportive in every single way - my (single, childless) brother has just today booked days off work to take care of the DDs when I am travelling for work, no questions asked. They give me advice to protect me and the DDs, and to keep my head straight, but they are almost too nice and too understanding - they see him as a normal human being in some ways still and so always remind me to keep up my end of the bargain of being a good parent and facilitating contact no matter how infrequent it is.
If I proactively text him he will speak to the girls and make them feel bad. DD1's anxiety will flare up again before our hols, and it's not fair on her. I am adamant I don't want to call him and they really think I should.
The anxiety, guilt, worry and simple confusion over a minor matter like this is horrendous. If he is a good dad he will call them. I'll have to leave it as that I think. He clearly doesn't give a shit though as he has been texting me to argue about this all week but hasn't once actually picked up the phone to speak to his children.
His work have compulsory shutdown over Xmas so I think its only just dawned on him that its xmas and he hasn't got any plans, so the DD should be dropping everything to attend to his needs as he is free.
Natsku your WN sounds deranged. Your poor DD. Somehow the fucking us about feels far worse at Xmas, when it should be a time for happy families and lovely relaxing breaks from work.