Dating thread 111- just waiting...

[Evilwater]

I know these threads have come in handy for many dipping their toes for the first time into OLD. So here we are again ... another 1000 posts down:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good.

I'm not sure if there's an official definition, mother but the way I'd look at it is:
Dating someone, you've met them more than once in a romantic setting
Seeing someone, it's possibly exclusive. You've met their genitals
In a relationship. Almost definitely exclusive, unless you've agreed otherwise. You've met their family and/or friends

To hook up with is American slang to have sex with, although it can also mean to meet.

I've never heard 'to mooseburger' as a verb before. It does have homicidal connotations in that context.

Best line seen recently on a woman's OD profile:

I'm like Gilette: the best a man can get
(Also, I'll cut you)

Thanks bant I might steal that gilette line.

To Mooseburger someone does sound a bit sinister doesn't it. And I think I've used it incorrectly as a verb. I think the correct phrase on this thread is "to serve mooseburgers" not to mooseburger someone.

Bant that's brilliant: both the Gillette line and 'to mooseburger'... I think that every time I see it used as a verb on here. Who knows, maybe it will make it into the urban dictionary shortly!

Oh wait, I looked and it's already in there... slightly different meaning but not a million miles away

Ha! This is very different from how it originated on here, I think..

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Mooseburger

This place is SO educational!

I really like the Gillette line. Haven't come across it before.

how did the moose burger even started?
(never heard it before this Thread)

what's going on guys? must be end of the year blues, I'm getting msg from guys I've not heard for months

and Mr Two.... yeah right

People want a snog on New Year's Eve, boxing.

Someone went to a mans house where he'd offered to serve burgers made from moose, I believe, I wasn't reading much back then as I was busy.

It reminds me of an experiment with monkeys.

A dozen monkeys, in a lab, with a stepladder. Scientists put a banana at the top of the stepladder, but when a monkey tries to climb it to get the banana he - and all the others - gets sprayed with cold water. Monkey is upset and climbs down. Other monkeys try, and all get sprayed with water.

Then the scientists remove one monkey and replace with another. The monkey sees the banana and goes to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys stop him because they don't want to get sprayed. So no one gets sprayed.

Then they replace the other monkeys one by one. Same behaviour, each time. Until eventually, a monkey is being introduced to a room with a banana on a stepladder but when he goes to get it, every monkey stops him. And no one knows why. None of them have ever been sprayed, they just know that everyone hates anyone climbing the ladder. Hence they stop them, so no one ever gets sprayed.

This is why the thread has phrases like mooseburgers. It also explains religion, and why no one wants to holiday in Belgium.

Anybody tried Once?? Handpicked matches apparently...

Loving that analogy Bant.

Well I have a new iron. Been chatting for a couple of days - quite intensely. Not met yet, but agreed to meet after christmas. I want to take some time to chat before meeting. besides it is a busy time of year.

I also have another who is intermittently getting in touch. But he is a little young and never actually says anything real. Just stuff like "thinking about you". I wonder why as he knows nothing about me...

Ooh thanks Genuine, I just looked up Once and I might give it a try. I have only tried OKCupid so far: I was on for two weeks and found it a bit too overwhelming and time-consuming, then I disabled my profile while I dated someone and haven't returned... I was going to wait until the new year to give it another go, but I think I could cope with one potential match a day!

Well it seems like both the Italian men on this thread turned out to be no go's!

After my really nice lunch date with "my" Italian and my son if you remember, which HE had insisted on because he couldn't wait to meet and insisted he was FINE with kids, he's now cancelled our second date Friday night saying he couldn't take on the responsibilities of "standing beside me raising my child" as lovely as he was
it was one date and I wasn't asking him to!

I was actually a bit annoyed and sent him a stroppy message then blocked him. I proabably over reacted but I was disappointed, a bit confused and a bit hurt..I was actually really looking forward to a proper date with him tomorrow evening, and he'd been so keen it was just a bit of a blow. I mention my kids in my profile and pretty on in conversation too, so I just wish he had thought about it before. I guess at least he was honest, he could have seen me half a dozen more times, mooseburgered then had this revelation. Or ghosted. But still a bit annoying

Oh Last. I am sorry to hear that. Seems like he had second thoughts. best you found out now. Think of it as his loss and you had a nice first date and some good pizza.

The stroppy message hopefully taught him a lesson.

I do a good line in stroppy message

Oh last nickname that's a let down. I'm surprised it seemed really promising from what you said I suppose that's rule number 4. Sorry I'm probably making you feel worse.

I've got a date on sat with mr good manners. The last date I had gave me a scary furvent kiss and I froze. He said he'd see me again go out again blah blah and i never heard back. Oh well onwards

Do I get points for the most polite request?

'Hi, do you mind adding me to whatsapp please? I'd like to show you a picture of this huge pole you could be sat on. Thank you.'

Pahahaha

Arkk - no way! Why am I getting none of these types?

That should be one for social media...

Ark I used to do pole fitness so I'd have added him then said "that's a lot smaller than I'm used to" he asked so nicely as well!

Hi all, not posted much as still seeing same man from OLD. Now at around one month of dating. It's still early days and Bant I think your description of a relationship being about meeting family and friends is true. We've told significant others in our lives and he met my DCs, I'm meeting his but possibly after Christmas, working it out. So I'm still saying 'seeing' rather than relationship, but have referred to him as my BF when easier to explain.

Having set out on OLD with 'ideals', I'm surprised at areas that I am able to compromise on, but have benefits that I didn't expect to have. So think it's more about getting to know a person and working out a 'fit' rather than setting out with someone initially in mind. I hope that doesn't sound calculated, it's just he was a very random man for me to respond to doesn't match ideals as decided to play the numbers game and was writing to 10+ and we texted each other in the same way. Then met and 'clicked' in person.

When I have feelings of doubt, my ex cheated on me and left me I try to think f**k it and move on rather than over worry.

Anyhow OLD has, for now at least, worked for me. If it doesn't work out I'd consider OLD again.

I'd recommend the numbers game. It's tiring writing to lots of different people, but increases your chance of finding a good match.

Great to have a positive update lilac thank you!
It's the odd happy ending that keeps me going...and others I expect!

I've signed up to Bumble this evening, and I see it's the same faces as tinder. Ahh well, it's a numbers game as you say

Have decided to have a break from it already. I have given a couple of nice people my email address and am now suspending my account, as I've had 3 serious over-investors now, one of whom turned quite nasty, and I just can't be bothered policing that...

Have enjoyed my little foray into this thread though, good luck to all, I might try it again in a few months...

Sorry to hear your Italian was a no-go, last. Still, like you say, at least he was honest (not that that helps, I know)

Still exchanging WhatsApp messages with Mr Normal. All very friendly and pleasant. There was a very faint hint of flirtatiousness in one message, but he didn't push it and it was alluding to a predictive text error I'd made

The only thing is- he's 8 years younger than me! I don't know how I missed that. I don't have a problem with it per se, but it means that he's not long out of his 30s and I'm nearer the 50 mark. But then I'm not looking for 'The One' right now, so what the hell.

No other interesting irons to pursue- several men have sent a 2nd message, but honestly, what do you say to someone who thinks "Hi!" twice is a good opener?