Online dating...... where have all the good men gone? Thread 110.

[Evilwater]

I know these threads have come in handy for many dipping their toes for the first time into OLD. So here we are again ... another 1000 posts down:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

I ve been on that o k c for a while so if I can be of any help (dish the dirt on some tosser) to feel free to ask ;)

Lilacpink40 have you got a second date planned with Mr Tall?

Clawdeen you will find that lots of profiles "disappeared"
I don't even bother answering if they look new / appear out of the blue as often they are just catfish

Hello all, and to all the new peeps.
My DS is ill, and I've been pretty much bored out of my mind. So far I've pretty much sorted out all the guys in a 50 mile radius, on 5 different sites. I'm now up to 100 miles and working through them. I phoned a guy last night on how looked like mr no commitment, and is 11 years older. The guy was a bit weird, totally OI. I'm glad he lives far away.

I've got a date Saturday night, with mr friend zone.
We seem to get on really well personally, however when I met him for a cup of tea I didn't sense any chemistry. This was a week or so after mr no commitment, and my head space wasn't right. I'm giving it another go, cause why not, mouse burgers might be served as I'm still like a dog in heat.

I've been lurking and reading some of your posts with interest. Are you all young and lovely?

I am separated and although not ready for a full-on relationship, I joined a couple of sites out of curiosity. The only men viewing my profile are miles away and/or about 20 years older than me. I've shown interest in others, whose criteria I meet, but no response from them at all.

The only thing that is bothering me about mr friend, is he keeps asking me if I fancy him.
Why on earth does this make me nervous?

•Evil water• is it not a fair question ? ;-)
How many time have you been out with him ?
I read you stated post first date there was no sparks

I've only seen him that one time.
It didn't help that I saw mr no commitment JUST before meeting mr friend. It has completely confused me, Of course I'm attracted to his picture. I do want the date to go well, and I am nervous.

I'm just feeling very confused.

Evil sounds like you may be in the same frame of mind as me.
I did fancy someone badly ( took me bloody 12 months to meet 1 I actually fancied ) and he cut it short back in September. I realise no one I meet can have a real chance, bless them...

Are you going for a proper drink this time? I hope so. Try to look at him as it was the first time, ask him more questions, focus on him. The reason I say this is because I have noticed that if I go to meet them half hearted I kind of make zero effort and thats a waste of time. SO now I have learnt to focus on them and take an interested (rather than let them ask me quest and get me to talk) By doing that they seem to gain some confidence and brings out the best in them
At least you will have more elements to see if it is worth pursuing for you
Hope it makes sense

I cannot spell anymore, kill me now

I'm going for a real date this time. Baby sitter booked out fit pretty much sorted. All I have to do is book the table. I am looking as it will be the first time. I do have questions for him, so I'll focus on that.

I just hope mr no commitment, isn't there.

cool cool I see - so if he asks again if you fancy him, tell him to ask you over breakfast :-)

I plan to get - baby sitter on friday

Boxing- what is your friday nite looking like?

What Is everyone standard first date like?

If it's a guy I really like, it's a meal at the place where everyone goes to have a nice time. It's by the sea, full of old world charm, nice and relaxed. No drunks, or loud parties. Lots of places to go off for some peace and have a good chat, or other things.....

boxing he's asked if it's a promise!

ahah try
"its a promise... unless you mess it up" :-)))

Well I'm out, I've come to the conclusion I just do not have the disposition for this. The constant rejection is really getting me down. Latest one basically just wants photos all the time, well most of the time I look like shit. I'm a student and a mum. I wear work out clothes with my hair scraped back. I cannot be arsed to get dolled up for a guy I've not even met yet tbh, no doubt that'll finish as soon as I say that. I meet so many beautiful, smart young girls with no kids and they can't even find anyone. I think that's my towel being thrown in right there.

Oh gosh evil no pressure! Good luck I hope you really like him this time after the mr No commitment

My first dates are always a quick drink. Wine in the evening or coffee if it's day. Never a meal! I always like to have the option of a quick getaway, if I saddle myself with a person I'd never met before for dinner I'd worry it would be awful. Usually a drink first time, cinema or dinner next date, or drinks somewhere else.

So after being totally ghosted by MrUnsuitable i have a new iron

But he's 10 years younger than me, fit as hell and bloody gorgeous frankly!
I'm very suspicious and about his seeming interest in me. I think he's taking the pee or something! Why would a guy who's could easily pull anyone be interested in a 45 year old single parent? If it's too good to be true it always is so I'm on high alert but enjoying his attention...

I've named him superman because of a tattoo on his chest

Boxing yes I have a second date planned Fri with Mr Tall and today's coffee date with Mr Smile was good too. Third one, I'll call Mr Young, isnt sending so many messages and my other two backups haven't either as I've not messaged them much. My backups include an older man who lives 50 min away from pretty much any civilisation. We have little in common. Other one is recently separated so desperate for attention. My backups aren't reliable backups but they're stopping my over investing and we're just having general chat on messages.

Mr Smile is keen to meet again, but if I have a good date and enjoy kissing Mr Tall on Fri I'll probably cancel.

Lastnick and evil why not go for it - nothing to lose?

I act as though the men I meet are almost "the one", ask lots of questions and smile lots. I'm then honest soon after on whether I'd be happy to meet again.

Faff I'm on 4 dating sites and live near a big city so it's probably easier to meet single men, but it was quiet for weeks so I did wonder whether my profile was ok. Maybe give it a week or two before changing your profile?

last I'm looking forward to hearing about superman.

Last, Mr 31 is almost 9 years younger than me and I felt like you - why me? Well now I believe him when he tells me that I'm funny, sexy, beautiful, amazing, because his actions back him up. Oh, and the sex is amazing, he can't get enough of me nearly 40 year old body Go for it!!

Cant keep up with all the names
I'm starting a spreadsheet

I have never gone for a first drink+dinner (both places already decided) before either. Too much right? Why did he even suggest that/why did I go for it .... I also hate eating in the evening

•Mrs fluff • you sounds loved-up

Pisssed - can relate to that. Mr Nuclear is being hot and cold, seemingly in relation to my status on pof saying I wanted to date but nothing serious.

Anyway, I'm having a break til after Christmas I think.

Faff! We meet from another thread! I've been OLD for a month or two and now think I definitely wasn't ready when I started. I am already quite jaded by it all, even though I've only been at it quite half heartedly. Feel free to pm me if you how-not-to-do-it-advice-for-recently-separated-people-looking-to-date-but-nothing-serious