I really don't want my son anymore.

[LockwoodJ]

How do I fix this? I don't want him.

So sorry to hear this.

It seems his peers are the triggering culprit here. I might be mistaken but I wonder whether it would be possible for you to get a restraining order from having the 'bad influence kids' come anywhere near you and your family including your DS? As they were instrumental in when your DS assaulted you at 3am.

I hope you find the right support for your DS and yourself and manage to get to the bottom of this.

Thinking of you op. I've worked in this field and in my LA it's difficult to get a child placed into care. I really hope you get the help you all need.

Did you go to school op? I would be working closely with them for support. There's usually a few people who are excellent with complex behaviour in most secondary schools. I feel for you. Your circumstances at the moment sound awful. You poor thing. If possible get him away from those friends: care through ss? Family to take him? Boarding school even if only for a year? Please look after yourself and your other child. Could you write your son a letter explaining how this is effecting you with some photocopied photos of him as a happier child. Might tear it up but worth a try.

I hope all is ok OP.

OP there wants her daughter to leave too.

Sorry OP, you sound really at the end of your rope.

If you are genuinely unable to safeguard your child you could relinquish his care to the local authority.

They can not refuse to accommodate him if he does not have a responsible adult who is prepared to provide care.

Good luck OP and don't be so hard on yourself.

Like many others have stated, although it is probably for the best, it is not easy to get a child into care as there are not places available but social care is the first step.

Please don't underestimate the impact of your DH's illness has had on your DS, not an excuse but may be a reason. I'm sure it's had a massive impact on you too. All these factors could be why he's gravitating towards these other children. It sounds like a difficult situation for you all having your DH ill and living away from you.

Please don't underestimate the emotional and physical risks this is having on your youngest DS.

Seek help from everyone and anyone, social care, school, police, GP, CAMHS.

Lockwood being a parent isn't easy and it sounds like you've stood by your son through thick & thin. You've given over and above the, "norm," (whatever that is), even having your cheek broken in the process.
The beating that your son has given you is nothing compared to the beating that you're giving yourself. Why? Would you be so harsh with a friend who was being treated like this?
If your local SS aren't very supportive, go to your Dr, or the school nurse, or women's aid (because you're the victim of a serious assault), or the police and demand that support measures and respite are put into place.
Short term placements for youngsters are available and with your injuries, you should demand one.
Well done for sticking by your son for so long. You've done all that you can for now, insist on professional support for him, for you, and for the rest of your family.

I feel for you op

Hope you're ok, OP?

Really hope you're ok OP!

My DD behaved like this when she was 14. Sneaking out of house in middle of night to meet some godawful friends. I went marching round to the house to demand she came home but when I arrived there were about 10 teenagers AND the parents sitting out the front drinking and smoking which was very intimidating
I rang the police and they came and took her and her stuff (she'd packed a bag of clothes) and told the parents that she wasn't allowed to stay there against my wishes.
They took her to station and kept her there for hours. She was adamant she didn't want to come home so I walked out even though husband didn't want to leave her. They placed her in temporary foster, gave her a social worker etc and it helped to a degree.
Please get police and SS involved. They can help to give you all some breathing space so that you can find a way forward.

I have had similar with my DS, but not to the extent you have, OP. My best wishes to you. It is not easy.

What happened yesterday when school broke up?

I hope you're ok.

OP I'm so sorry to hear what you're experiencing, it's not your fault.

In addition to alerting the school and social services, I also suggest you get in touch with an organisation called Respect

They run abuse and violence intervention programmes for young people aged 10-25. And have programmes for teenagers who are violent to parents. They would also be a source of advice and support. The phone number is on the website.

Best of luck.

I hope you're getting something sorted

Oh goodness OP, this sounds awful. I've not experienced anything like this, but can imagine how hard it must be for you. I would ignore some of the posts on here which are a bit judgmental.

Can't offer any advice really as I'm no expert, but do try and put yourself first and look after yourself as you'll need to be really strong.

I hope things improve for you

OP, how are you both today?

All the suggestions to work with the school, to team up with the school, the school should help.

Really? Stretched resources as it is and you really think the school should be heavily involved with this issue?

Primary aim of school is to educate. To see the school as a companion in this situation is to just put more pressure on what I guess is an already heavily overworked team.

Social services. This is PRECISELY their remit.

Oh and be beat you up?
The police.

This is your son. He is going to be a wife beater, a child beater and who knows what else unless he gets help quickly. And that help has got to be strong and fierce.

Schools do work closely with SS these days Blonde.
I think our HOY spent more time at SS meetings than anything else tbh.

* think our HOY spent more time at SS meetings than anything else tbh.*

I find that troubling. The education of hundreds of pupils in his hands and yet he is having to be closely involved with the bahaviour of a handful of children.