Online Dating ... and this is a thread for while we are waiting! Dating thread 109

[loobyloo1234]

I know these threads have come in handy for many dipping their toes for the first time into OLD. So here we are again ... another 1000 posts down:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Yes, number 4 is an excellent filter, it does have that to be said for it.

:)

Oh god Baklava, number 4 is just awful! I see quite a few where the ex is cropped out, or they're relaxing in bed, or the 'doing something manly so I need my shirt undone' brigade!! Why put really old pics up? You might have less interest with more recent ones, but at least its genuine.

Please ladies! As you know, I've met Mr Gosport and he is lovely, I'm desperate to see him again..........but I don't know yet when that will be!

In the meantime, a chap who was messaging me when I first joined Match has looked at my profile again and favourited me. He seemed really nice, but I'm assuming he met up with someone else and I didn't hear from him - so dko I wink back and see what happens!?! I'm so torn/confused!

I've been ghosted again...I don't get it! What is wrong with men? Do they want supermodels?

p.s. I've been lurking for a while reading all your posts. I've been single for 14 (yes, 14) years. I've had so many dates. I've invested hours and hours into OLD but to no avail. This last man was semi RL and I thought it seemed positive. But no.

Baklava - ooh the ex cropped out. Joy. So many of those men. Although I also really hate men that take selfies and pout so I don't think they can win really can they?

MrsFluff - why not? You're still single aren't you?

longtermsinglemummy - I hate these ghosters. So rude? How long were you seeing him and what do you mean semi RL? PS welcome to the thread

I think you should do it, mrsfluff. It's an online wink, ffs, not adultery! You're not marrying Mr Gosport just yet and there is much left for you discover about each other before you'll be anywhere near that point. 1 date is not going steady unless that has been specifically agreed. It never has been and may be even less so in the land of OLD. I think it's about keeping all fun options open and trying to heat up all good irons at this stage. As things ease into long-termness with someone these are conversations you can have with the men who turn out to be special for you, who you'd like to have a more steady relationship with. When you and mr gosport/match/other lovely man you've yet to meet agree that you're walking out exclusively then of course you must drop the others unless you both grow into polyamorous types but until then wink away, girlfriend!
p.s. Would you be upset if Mr Gosport was winking at another?

Sorry to hear about the ghosting, LTSM. I honestly don't think most men are looking for supermodels but it's a part of the territory that isn't easy.:(

Waiting for a call from a bloke from down the road who wanted to talk rather than message.

Hi Longterm!

I've already winked back Looby I keep looking at Mr 31 on WhatsApp, but I'm resisting...........I only told him yesterday, for the 2nd time, that I just couldn't see us happening!

Why not Mrsfluff - you have made no commitments to MrGosford as yet.

I love a good ghosting long - maybe it's the halloween spirit :) I'd rather be ghosted than have someone tell me why they don't want any more dates...

Oh it was only one date. But could have been a second.

We have children the same age, and I've seen him around for years. But got chatting online. Having said that we didn't have a huge amount in common...he's a vegetarian teetotal and I love steak and a glass of red wine. But we seemed to parent the same, and lovely that he lives close.

I'm bored with OLD!

Right, I've given my head a wobble!! No, I don't think I would mind if Mr Gosport was messaging someone else. Well, I went the whole hog and messages him.....just a 'Hello Stranger' type message.

Must restist Mr 31 though, no matter how horny I am!!!!

Good evening all
Good winking mrsfluff!
There was noooooooo snogging!!! We had a lovely walk, then it rained so he came back for a cuppa & we chatted for an age on the sofa--but NOTHING!
He said he has disabled his OLD account as he's really enjoying spending time with me & finds me very attractive but then looked mortified that he'd told me.
I'm giving him one more chance as I think /hope he's just being super cautious or he finds me difficult to suss out, which could well be the case.

Ooh, Hygge, he sounds keen - do you think it's genuine. How do you feel about him?

Hygge He sounds really keen, and quite lovely

He is really lovely and quite serious about it all in quite an endearing way.
I do think he's genuine-he's opened up a lot about himself, his work, family etc He can also 'read' me scarily well
I do like him, quite a bit, and there's a definite emotional connection or understanding there; but I need to feel a physical spark I think, and need something to happen to see if it's there.

I think you really need to have a kiss Hygge!

I agree mrsfluff-I think I'm going to have to try to instigate it next time ( that makes me feel v nervous indeed). It would be easier after a drink, but he doesn't drink .

Well as long as you can have one......or two!!

I'm sat here very bored and daughter is away and I'm actually considering arranging a booth call I'm so not usually like this!!

Good winking, fluff.;)

Kiss him, hygge, kiss him! (she says, like she's an expert which is so so so not the case!)

Oh dear, that was a bit of a dull call. I was boring myself with compensatory cheeriness...

What's a booth call??? It sounds much more exciting than the call I just had!

Could you take a miniture bottle of gin and down it 2 seconds before you see him, hygge?

Lol, on my frustration, predictive text got the better of me!! Booty call

Ah. Love that the woman has gone from afraid to wink to booty calls in the space of 10 posts!

Lol sumo, I've already messaged him

Miniature gin may be the way to go! I would much rather he took the lead, although me may be just as nervous as me I guess.
Oooh, booty call; I have no one I could call, but probably would if I could, also home alone here with daughter at her Dad's.

Long term-Ghosting is infuriating, sorry that happened.